trouble with life balance

[Chromeo]

So I was reading an article about this entrepreneur who started scvngr.com, how the most amazing entrepreneurs like steve jobs and the like have this near manic personality where all they do is seek to acheive all else and others be damned. And how many venture capital firms even conduct personality test like interviews seeking to give there money to these type of people.

the guy behind this scvngr.com has a sleeping bad on a couch in his office, admits to having nearly no friends, or at least never seeing them as he works 8am to 10pm and has had only one girlfriend. Money is not his motivator either, simply to win.

Now this is a pretty admirable drive for a person to have, being an entrepreneur I realize some of this drive that it takes. However its a little disheartening. I really dont want to have to work these insane hours, sacrificing friends and women for the chance to be a millionaire before I die.

I have fun being an entrepreneur and being the boss but at the same time I am envious of the 9-5 I see, having decent money to go out any night they want, weekends off and 3-4 weeks vacation a year.

Maybe I enjoy life and save some money and fund a business later in my life? Im really much happier person when im earning decent money doin any kind of job. Feeling as tho I might be wasting my youth. Always wanted to act or be a musician, real estate interests me. Or should I stick with it?

Basically am un happy doing the things im interested in because Im not making great money, got school loans comin and staying at my aunts house (terrible situation to snag women). And I dont want to end up hating the things I like doing because Ive turned it into my business.

Anybody have experience's like this?

 

[^__^]

There are ways to have the business practically run itself so you can remove yourself from the equation and still earn profit, but you will still have to suffer long hours at one point or another. That's inevitable.

 

[f283000]

I don't think you have the right entrepreneur mentality yet. You think all those successful entrepreneurs you mentioned were thinking "man i hate working 10 hours on this I wish i was out with friends or going out with women."

friends and women are the least of your worries when you are really passionate about your business and being successful. Your mentality right now is just wanting the money and benefits but not the hard work/sleepless nights and no social life that may be required to make it big.

I used to go out every week, then I started working on my own business and learning marketing. I got a lot of flack from friends, people started thinking i'm some kind of nerd and I wouldn't be surprised if some people that had not known me for a while thought I was gay or something! In their mind a guy not in his 30's should be out getting drunk, going out with women or at the club on a saturday night, and not spending it on his computer working on his website!

Once you get into it you won't care about anything else. Realize that you don't get to take a break until you make it big. If the guy at scvngr.com is still sleeping in his office and has no gf even though he is probably a multi-millionare then that to me is wrong. Once you make it big then you can take the foot of the pedal and have other people do some of your work and you can live a normal life again and play lots of golf

 

[Chromeo]

There are ways to have the business practically run itself so you can remove yourself from the equation and still earn profit, but you will still have to suffer long hours at one point or another. That's inevitable.

yes obviously, and thats the goal. Trying to do that sooner than later right now.

I used to go out every week, then I started working on my own business and learning marketing. I got a lot of flack from friends, people started thinking i'm some kind of nerd and I wouldn't be surprised if some people that had not known me for a while thought I was gay or something! In their mind a guy not in his 30's should be out getting drunk, going out with women or at the club on a saturday night, and not spending it on his computer working on his website!

I mean thats exactly where I'm at. I know what it takes, and I could easily do that, and I do. But I see everyone else around me living up their 20's. Although I guess my last two gf's are now dating service industry workers in their 30's. Im sure If i keep it up I'll be making much better money by my 30's but I will no longer have my youth. Maybe its because when I was in school I feel like I didnt live it up enough because I was working in a restuarant making just enough money to pay for rent and while taking out just enough loan money to pay for school.

I had one summer/school year of having enough money to live and play and I was probably the happiest I had ever been, and it showed, the ladies loved it (I think I had 5 interested girls at that point, but stupid me didnt spin them all at the same time).

Im just wondering if I shouldnt be just working to live right now, and start working for the future a little later, maybe when I have a little money put away from a regular job and a solid girl to come home to, and wouldnt have to worry about going out so much. At least have an apartment back in the city, Not living at my aunts house to save money because my self made income is not steady. Sh!ts just frustrating and i dont want to end up hating what I'm doing.

Everyone always says do what you love, but what happens when what you love turns into a chore. Where you could have any other job, where maybe your proud of what you do, or enjoy it somewhat, but its still a chore, still work. You have that differentiation of what is work and what is play. Me, trying to do what I have fun doing, its starting to become a chore, and I'm losing that differentiation of what is work and what is play.

 

[f283000]

I mean thats exactly where I'm at. I know what it takes, and I could easily do that, and I do. But I see everyone else around me living up their 20's. Although I guess my last two gf's are now dating service industry workers in their 30's. Im sure If i keep it up I'll be making much better money by my 30's but I will no longer have my youth. Maybe its because when I was in school I feel like I didnt live it up enough because I was working in a restuarant making just enough money to pay for rent and while taking out just enough loan money to pay for school.

I totally understand that but you are still young in your 30's. You make it sound like you can no longer party and live it up once you go past 29 and become 30 years old!

You said you situation is similar to mine, and mine is similar to yours. I also struggled with the thoughts of "losing my youth" and not living life a little more. I think most of us do that are young and trying to do something for ourselves.

I personally set 1 day for fun out of the whole week to have fun. I work in a regular job, come home, work on my project, sleep like 5 or 6 hours, go back to work on my regular job, and repeat the process. Sometimes I go out with friends friday or saturday, and sometimes not at all. I'm so into working that going out is more of a chore than staying home. Sometimes i'll do nothing but work all 7 days of the week.

Maybe you should try something like that. Talk to your friends during the week, figure out on what day you guys want to go hang out and do stuff and then assign that as your free day. I don't know if you like the idea of just 1 free day a week maybe have 2. It's up to you.

When it comes to women I pretty much gave up dating since I started working on my projects. You just can't be a full time entrepreneur and have a girlfriend. Women won't be able to accept you being busy all the time. My mentality changed to just trying to fudge a woman in as few dates as possible and that's it. I can't afford having relationships due to lack of time. If I can get some action by the 2nd or 3rd date i'm happy. Like I said anything relating to going out goes into that 1 free day out of the week.