"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Tough Situation

StarmanDeluxe

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Here's the (long) story:

I'm a freshman. I've known this junior for like three years, but didn't get really close with her till this year. We eventually went out.

So, I kind of discover within a week or so that this isn't for me (spare me from the "You're a freshman guy going out with a junior girl and YOU dumped HER?" thing please), and I dump her after about three weeks. She gets really pissed for no real reason, but then comes clamoring back, saying that she wanted to still be friends. So, after some deliberation about how she doesn't want to be physical at all with me, we work some things out.

For a week or so, things were great. Then, all of a sudden, she slips her hand into mine. I sort of retract, and she gets really pissed. After a day or so, things patch up. She still hugs me and stuff whenever she can.

So, before you go off saying "she's a *****," know that she's a super awesome person most of the time. It's just that she gets really awkward around relationship stuff--prime reason I dumped her.

Anyway, I get to liking this other girl. We're totally set to go out, but I'm afraid my ex is gonna get flip out on me. I'm also totally afraid she'll pull out the big guns and excommunicate all her friends from me. I attend a small arts school in which I am a freshman and don't know all that many people. She knows EVERYONE. I will become, by and large, a loner if this happens.

So, quick recap summary: former girlfriend wants to remain friends but will probably get really pissed if I advance on other girls. This is bad.

Any suggestions?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Supero Masculus

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Hmmmm.... Well i think you should flirt a bit with the other chicks and see how she reacts. If she reacts positively then go in for the kino. If not try to subtly find out why. if that doesn't work then try being freinds with all the other girls so the wont excommunicate you. If not then try sources outside of school if possible.
 

StarmanDeluxe

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I guess I didn't make it clear, but she totally flipped out last time she saw me flirting. I nipped it in the bud by immediately going and having a face-to-face talk with her, where she said "I really like you, and I know we're not going out, but seeing that really hurt me, and I don't want to lose you because you're with other girls..." blah blah blah.

So possessive :(
 

Supero Masculus

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Ouch... Fear not for where there is a will, there is a way. Ok, does this ex-girl have a current boyfreind? If not then set her up with one of your dudes, if yes then blow up on her for being like with another guy and she's bytching about how you flirted with another chick. Oh and make sure the dude you set her up with will keep her busy for a long, long time.;)
 

LikRetsam

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Lol. I've never been in that situation but I think it's funny. Since I've never been, I may be wrong BUT:
I would take the chick I wanted. Period. You are going to change your life around some *****? lol. She can tell everyone to hate you! Oh no! Now what?! All the dumb****s hate me.

What would it matter? those are the people you don't wanna associate with!

Guy, life is short. Ain't no way you are going to miss out on things for some other dumb ass.

Lik
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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