"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Touchdown

Dali_tx_o

Don Juan
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Hello gentlemen,

Seeing a lack of actionable and fun little tips, I've got a little golden move to share. Best suited in mixed social circle situations, for those under 30 or so (a lot depends on your personality).

When a girl says something (incredibly) stupid, interrupt and ask her if she knows what “touchdown” means.
Ignore her lack of football knowledge, shake your head and proceed to tell her that it has another meaning. Ask her if she has ever heard of Down’s syndrome. Tell her that it’s a tradition in your friend circle, that once someone says something not-so-very-smart, you proceed to do a “Touch-Down”, as you touch her shoulder. If she doesn’t get it, do another “touchdown”.

Congratulations, you just got a “pass this ****-test and collect tingles” card for the particular girl. From that moment on, anytime she says anything you dislike or throws a **** test at you, all you will have to do is simply place your hand on her shoulder and give her a knowing look, every so often accompanied by a patronizing “touchdown” coming from your mouth. No effort, no thinking, just a little touch.

If your social circle knows this little move, it actually becomes a lot more fun when someone who is not in-the-know gets "touchdown-ed", and can quickly spread around.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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