"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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too much sarcasm = douche?

ne0phyte

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good point about using descretion and taste. that's definitely something i want to improve on. have i just been making crude jokes then? i'll give you guys the background story.

so I got ppl to come out for happy hour on st patricks. the bar actually ran out of green beer, so one of my female friends ragged on me for picking a bar with no green beer on st pattys. so i told everyone it was all a trick, and that it was actually my herpes coming out party, and they should all need to get tested now. another girl chimed in and said, hey at least it's not aids. that's when i countered by saying the whole you can fight off aids if you're rich like magic johnson, herpes stays with you forever. then girl3 says that's because magic had hiv, not aids. that's when i made my comment, "really, you're going to be super technical here?" with a grin and a light jab on her arm.

these people are all from my master's program in health (which is why we talk a lot about diseases and such). i've known them since school started. the style that I'm going for is more like will smith (friendly, joking, easy to talk to) than james bond (strong silent). it suits my personality better
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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st_99

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I don't think your comment was sarcastic at all. It would have been sarcastic if you said "ohhhhh, is that what he had? you're smart." in like a monotone dry voice.
 

magickarl

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You don't have to mentally script everything you say. Go ahead and speak extemporaneously. Just be conscientious of whom is in your presence. Personally, I was raised to behave politely in front of aquaintances, especially of the female variety. For example, my father always told me it was low-class to curse in front of females. So, as you might expect, it's very rare (though it happens) that I curse in front of a respectable lady.

With loose aquaintances, I talk in about the same fashion that I type. Imagine Morgan Freeman reading these words exactly as they've been typed. Thats how I talk. Only, I'm white.

With close friends in privacy, it's a bit different. My mannerisms become more relaxed, and I usually talk in a way that would make a nun sweat. Imagine Joe Pesci in GoodFellas. I talk about like that. Only, with a much lighter accent.

Will Smith has some definite style. He has a lot of class too. Dialogue like the one you described sounds more like a bad saturday night live skit. Not too offensive for TV, but definitely low brow. It conjures a mental image of the guy about to fall off the bar stool. Don't be that guy.

Watch a few episodes of House, MD and watch how Greg House behaves. Bear in mind you'll want to tone the dialogue down several notches. You are observing his style and delivery, not the words themselves.
 
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