"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Too good to be true?

Brian Drake

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I've been a lurker for a long time (I think this is only my second or third post) because I've found the answers to questions in other threads but this time I need either a reality check or a kick in the pants for being stupid...

I went to the mall today to finally cash in a Christmas gift certificate and had to run the gauntlet of sales kiosks that line the middle of the walkway. This very attractive blonde approached me with a sales pitch on skin cream or something, and I decided I would flirt with her for a bit (for practice) before telling her I didn't have any money. Anyway while she demonstrated the product on my hands I started flirting and she flirted back and yadda yadda yadda 20 minutes later I decided to buy the product (a face cleanser--I thought, heck, maybe it will help give me a fresher look for when I'm talking to other women) and ask for her phone number (for practice).

But... Toward the end she asked if I was on Facebook but then said, "No, not Facebook, I'll just give you my number," and she wrote it on my receipt. I asked if she liked to dance, and she got very excited about that and said yes. Because her scratches are hard to read, she told me, she made sure I could read her number before I left. "This is a four, that's an eight...." She asked me what I was doing on Valentine's Day and when I said I was straightening my sock drawer she laughed and said she wanted to go to a particular restaurant...

She's from Israel and just moved to the U.S. so maybe they do things differently over there but I can't help but wonder if this is the real deal (it's never happened like this before!) or a hustle or what. I really feel like I lost control of the situation and she led me by the nose. But if she was just hustling for a sale she (a) didn't make much money and (b) revealed way too much about herself (her full name and more!). I'm going to do the follow-up, but I thought I would ask y'all your opinion.

I know that when chicks like you, they help you; I've never had this much help before and it's left me scratching my head.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Htienvu

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Damn dude, give her a call in a day or two and set up a date. This cat is in the bag if you play your games right.
 

oneboy21

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There might be lots of things here.She is new to US and western culture. Play the cards properly she will be yours. Hanging out on valentine day might be little too much if you know what i mean.
There will be lots of cultural differences you need to think here.
 

Serg897

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Thats more straight-forwardness than I see ussually in women. Give her call, set up a date - this one should be easy.
 

Atom Smasher

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These girls at these kiosks are tatally scamming you, guys.

They are notorious for flirting in order to generate sales. They will go to practically any length to manipulate you into a sale. I know exactly what you're talking about. They're from the Middle East, they take your hand and apply this or that cream, they polish one of your nails, and slowly suck you in by giving you the attention that you demonstrate to them that you need.

They are truly experts at their craft. Proceed with caution. I have experience in this. There's nothing wrong with playing around to see for yourself but you will find yourself short of at least $40 in the process.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Brian Drake

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Atom Smasher said:
These girls at these kiosks are tatally scamming you, guys.

They are notorious for flirting in order to generate sales. They will go to practically any length to manipulate you into a sale. I know exactly what you're talking about. They're from the Middle East, they take your hand and apply this or that cream, they polish one of your nails, and slowly suck you in by giving you the attention that you demonstrate to them that you need.

They are truly experts at their craft. Proceed with caution. I have experience in this. There's nothing wrong with playing around to see for yourself but you will find yourself short of at least $40 in the process.
^ Yes.

You have articulated my reasons for not being all fired up better than I could.

However "for practice" I will make the call. I've been out of the dating scene for almost two years now (been unemployed or underemployed and just trying to survive lately), and now that things have settled down I am working my way back by practicing on anything that moves.

Thanks for the input, everybody.
 

Leporello

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It's not 'too good to be true'. It's what would happen if our culture were the least bit honest about dating and we didn't act like hypocrites all the time.
 

mustfirstregister

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Good for you. I feel your approach was a little bit weak. You could have qualify her and kino her. Tell her you don't have plans for Vday and ask her out. Bring flowers. Chicks dig that.
 
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