"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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To the Recorders/Musicians/Engineers

SickAgain

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I need to buy a mic to record my jam sessions. I need something that has a wide frequency range and that can connect to a computer either by USB or mic line. I wanna spend around $20-$80. I am not doing this for professional cuts, but just to record my jams for fun but with quality too. Does anyone know of a mic that can fulfill this?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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ready123

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I'd go with a Shure SM57 if you need a cheap dynamic mic

are you going directly into the sound card or do you have an audio interface? also, what instruments are you recording?
 

SickAgain

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I just have a laptop, so it has a mic in jack and a usb port. i'll be recording electric guitar and some drums, mainly guitar though.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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WhitePimp

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Are you recording a full band, or just your own ideas by yourself? And if it is just you, is it acoustic or electric?


With a dynamic mic, you need to pretty much have the mic placed facing the source of sound and be relatively close, unless you're in a very loud band in which case backing it off is necessary to get instrument separation and clarity. But to just have something to remember ideas by, your best bet is just set it up facing the instruments and monitor the levels until it sounds good recorded.
 

SickAgain

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I'd say 90% of the time its just gonna be myself playing electric guitar. The amp i use is a Fender Hotrod, its about 40W if you're not familiar. What is consider relatively close? 1 foot? 2 feet?
 

WhitePimp

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You could probably get away with just placing it a few feet away if you're blasting a 40W amp. SM57's are great for close micing of the speaker but that pertains mostly to recording professionally, etc. To just get your stuff clear and sounding good, just place the mic in the room relatively close and adjust until it sounds good to you. Micing an amp properly is really difficult but an SM57 is a great mic for it.
 

DarthJuan

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WhitePimp said:
You could probably get away with just placing it a few feet away if you're blasting a 40W amp. SM57's are great for close micing of the speaker but that pertains mostly to recording professionally, etc. To just get your stuff clear and sounding good, just place the mic in the room relatively close and adjust until it sounds good to you. Micing an amp properly is really difficult but an SM57 is a great mic for it.
I use a SM58 for vocals.
When I record my amp, I just take the top off.
If I'm not mistaken, a SM57 is basically a SM58 without the top.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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DarthJuan

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SickAgain said:
I'd say 90% of the time its just gonna be myself playing electric guitar. The amp i use is a Fender Hotrod, its about 40W if you're not familiar. What is consider relatively close? 1 foot? 2 feet?
I place my mic right up next to the grille.
Try different placement for different sounds.
 

Mandiblard

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I put my mic so close to my amp that it's touching. It's a crappy $5 mic and even still the sound it records that way is quite good, definitely listenable. Just experiment.
 
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