"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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To kino or not to kino

V

viking22

Senior Don Juan
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I hear different views on the use of kino.

Some guys say that touching a girl too much on a first date makes you seem needy/desperate and makes her uncomfortable and it is better to let her come to you and wait for her to touch you and then mirror her. Doc Love would be an example of this school of thought.

From my experience Ive seen some validity to this. Girls usually will find an excuse to touch me if they are interested and then by mirroring them back they will usually keep touching me and that way we get touchy-feely with her feeling comfortable with it leading to physical rapport.

Other guys say that touching her a lot on the first date turns her on and gets her into a sexual state which makes seduction easier. While not touching her makes her see you as not interested or asexual.

What do you guys think?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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I

Iceberg

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I think there's a big gray area between "touching her too much" and "not touching her at all." And that's where you want to be.

One seems like neediness. The other seems like lack of courage/sexuality.
 
F

fatdog

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You have to gauge her reactions. Start off with light kino and see how she reacts. Remember all the tips and "tricks" you read about are merely guidelines to real life encounters. Each girl is an individual, and although they all tend to have a herd mentality, they're still human and still make individual choices. Not to mention how they feel about you makes a big impact.

There is no way to measure "too much" or "too little" as a general metric. Those are subjective to a number of things, including but not limited to: A) what she's comfortable with B) how she feels about you C) how appropriate the touching is for the situation

You'll have to gauge it yourself because no two situations will be the same, even if its the same girl.
 
E

Elephant

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I you do it right, a light touch on the first date should not seeem needy at all. However, if you do it in a creepy or nervous way or constantly use light touches then you will seem needy.

As far as waiting for her to touch you: I would recomend you should act and start the touching(something you want to start) opposed to waiting for her to do it. Just get in one touch. It will say it is ok to touch me back and I'm not an asexual. One light touch won't come across as needy. Just do it with confidence.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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