"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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To Drop or not to Drop standards

mackdaddy27

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I guess, i can't really be speaking since i m a virgin and not really experienced. but it seems to me, like I can't 'get' mysefl to call and continue with some of the girls that are below HB 7 status. like i can only go for a hb 7 and above but to get one of those isn't so easy without experience .but i haven't tried. like unless they are in that high range, i don't want to waist my time, but then again i really shouldn't be that picky since i have no experience. well, do i drop my standards for now..or do i just up the game and never drop my standards....
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Existential

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Interesting question.

The problem is what you logically want isn't consistent with what you internally feel like you deserve.

Gaming a 9 is no more difficult than gaming a 7. In fact, in many senses, they are easier. The only significant factor would be that a 9 is rarer than a 7 and so you have less opportunities to practice.

Now, you seem to be of two minds here. The first just wants to get experience. You've mentally tied this to and made it a prerequisite to getting the girls with whom you are actually interested. For this reason, you either need to a.) get that experience or b.) remove that tie or c.) resign to the fact that you won't be getting that higher echelon of women.

The easier course of action would, of course, be 'a' (well, c would be the easiest, but, I'm certainly not going to tell you to give up. I wouldn't. :) ) . Once you have the experience and a little more confidence you can game the more attractive girls. At that point, what you logically want will mesh with what you feel like you internally deserve and you'll find much more success in that range. As it is, you're straddling a fence and not going to find much of anything.
 

Paper Man

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I actually posted the same some days ago.

Should one lower his standards as a means to increase his experience, having as final goal the achievement of one's goals? Or should we stick with what we really want, keep trucking forward against the wall?
 

Technical1

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this is a really good question.

Its so hard not to flake on HB7s though. Hard to be congruent with them..

Existentials answer is interesting. Food for thought.
 

Maxtro

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If they are attractive to you on some level and they can get you hard then go for it. Experince is priceless and I wish I had a lot more of it.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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BMX

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My first girlfriend was about an 8 or 8.5, maybe a 9 to some. It turned out she was far from my personality and what I really wanted in a gf. She drinks and parties way too much for my liking among other things and I proved myself right in what I wanted before dating. Now for whoever, I definately have a lot clearer picture of what type due to experience.
 

Joe The Homophobe

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dropping your standards is not about "gaining experience" but about satisfying your hunger for sex. It all depends on you and how long you hold out and just your will power to work hard for it. Would you rather play the game and get rejected most of the year and just be alone that year or maybe even 2 years, but get 1 hb 7.0+ in that period? Or would you lower your standards because you are horny thus getting you a couple hook ups with some hb 6s in that same time??

the most important thing of all is animal attraction. If she is a 6 in the eyes of all your friends but she attracts you then nothing stops you, what matters is how attracted you are.. But lowering your standards and getting it on with a girl with a gut just because you want "experience," i don't know how that is going to help you grab the hb8s. Might as well just admit you lust for lovin which there is nothing wrong with that.
 

SinJester

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I almost 'lowered my standards' just to get into a relationship for my experiance. When I realzied that I wasn't attracted to her I backed down. Just couldn't do it, didn't seem right. Don't regret it.

However just for the hook up I would be more like to let the standards drop... a little.
 

Joe The Homophobe

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I think we have to define what "standards" we are dropping. Are we talking about forgetting about our dream girl hb 8.3 we see in school who is popular, hot, dresses to make guys drool, and is probably out of our league because we lack game and she is going out with a jerk? and instead going for an hb 6-6.5 which is a cute girl with a not so hot body who doesn't dress sexy or in a way to make herself look hot, but cute nontheless and at least has a pretty face.

or are we talking about just letting ourselves go and just going with whatever wild beast shows interest so we can get some luvin?
 

DoctorLW

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Standards are not as easily "dropped" as you think (without the aid of alcohol at least).

The reason I say this is because I simply cannot hook up with a girl I'm not attracted to. Just can't go through with it. There have even been some girls that are considered by most to be hot, and even I find them aesthetically pleasing, but still have no desire to fvck them. Just can't bring myself to go through with it. Makes no sense, I know, but your going to have a very difficult time getting legitimate practice when the girl you are practicing on you aren't even attracted to. In the end, isn't that exactly what dropping standards means? Either you are attracted or not.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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comic_relief

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Simple answer. No, one should never drop their standards.

I have very low look standards, but very high personality standards that I keep at all times. People seem to want to get the experience, but one thing that people forget about is the fact that once you are on a level within yourself, you will attract women and people in general at that same level.

Like attracts likes. No way to look around it. it is the law of attraction.

Actually, Pook made a post about this. The more confidence that he had the better the women that he attracted.

Personally, I remember the girls that i used to attract before sosuave was none that I would ever date.

For a year or two, I swore off dating entirely and did my own personal soul searching. I personally, improved myself to a plateau and attracted a girl like myself (my ex-girlfriend), but broke up with her a year ago.

Now, I got a girlfriend that is at my same level in most places. I still believe that I have a lot of self-improvement left within me.

The girls and standards that you have/get will be in direct proportion to the amount of self-improvement and confidence that you have achieved.

comic_relief
 

Andromax

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If you have little to no experience you should be dating as many women as you can whether you really like them or not. Don't bring home anything you'd get made fun of for, though!
 

mackdaddy27

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thanks the fear is , i dont want to lose my standards because i dropped them i dont want to start suddenly being attracted to hb 6s you know what i mean..

i want to keep being selective...
 

Rollo Tomassi

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Don't wish it was easier, wish you were better.
 
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