"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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to ask her out or not to ask her out

titoman

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ok as some of you might know, i'm at a new highschool, i sit with these these girls at lunch these couple days (i know them from work) anyways there is like 5 girls at the table, i'm pretty social with them, and they think i'm a hilarious guy (that's what they told my friend from work) anyways i sat with them 2 times so far, so i'm interested in one of the girls, should i ask her out as soon as possible, or build some rapport between us?

also i work out on my lunch, but these last 2 days the gym was closed that's why i got to sit with the girls, the gym is closed on fridays, should i put my "priorities" first and keep goin the gym everday except gym, and show some balls, or just go sit with them and have fun, and build some rapport?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

milkman

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Originally posted by titoman
they think i'm a hilarious guy (that's what they told my friend from work)
That´s good. :)

and: if you like this girl, then tell her that you like her and ask her out.
 

Alphathree

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Re: Re: to ask her out or not to ask her out

Originally posted by milkman
That´s good. :)

and: if you like this girl, then tell her that you like her and ask her out.
No, just ask her out, don't "tell her that you like her" jesus h christ

Say "Hey, by the way, are you free this friday? Let's grab a coffee." or whatever
 

Alphathree

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You're asking if you should go sit with them to build rapport. You seem to have some sort of limiting belief that this is in any way necessary.

You should need anywhere from zero to fifty words in total to make a girl attracted to you. Once you've done that, you can:

- become more scarce/challenging to increase her interest level if you think this is needed

and then/or

- ask her out

I know there are a lot of guys on here whose advice to everyone is "just kiss her" "just tell her you like her" "just ask her out".

Well that's great. If you want to listen to their advice, fine. But if you actually have some concern with getting this particular girl rather than just the experience of rejection, try taking my advice.

My advice is to judge her interest level first, if it's not high enough, then in Style's words, pump the buying temperature, AND THEN ask her out.

EDIT: and in general, you're not going to pump the buying temperature by spending a few HOURS extra talking to her unless you REALLY know what you're doing.

I haven't seen many people who generate MORE interest by blabbering at her or letting her blab.
 

milkman

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Originally posted by Alphathree
You seem to have some sort of limiting belief
You too, when you think it is a bad idea to tell/show a girl that you like her. ;)
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Alphathree

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Originally posted by milkman
You too, when you think it is a bad idea to tell/show a girl that you like her. ;)
I give advice that is actually relevant to the OP.

Maybe YOU can tell a girl that you like her. I can too. But I know how to say it in such a way that I don't come off like a dumbass.

Do you trust the OP to do that?
 

milkman

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Originally posted by Alphathree
Maybe YOU can tell a girl that you like her. I can too. But I know how to say it in such a way that I don't come off like a dumbass.
That´s great to hear.

Originally posted by Alphathree
Do you trust the OP to do that?
Sorry, what is an OP? If you mean the thread starter: yes I trust him to do that.

And even if he would come across as a dumbass, next time he will come across less as a dumbass and next next time, he will be able to say it with the same great effect like you and me. ;)

But again: I trust him. :)
 

TxCowboy

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Re: Re: Re: to ask her out or not to ask her out

Originally posted by Alphathree
No, just ask her out, don't "tell her that you like her" jesus h christ

Say "Hey, by the way, are you free this friday? Let's grab a coffee." or whatever
HAHAHAHA ! .... couldnt have put it better ... thats plain English for ya right there ... just get the # and ask her out for coffee on whatever day ....

SIMPLE AS THAT
 

titoman

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wow great advices guys... i think i'll just work out at the gym till friday, say hi to her if i see her, then friday i get to sit with them, then after talking to her a while, i'll try Alphathree's advice, and say "Hey, by the way, are you free this friday? Let's grab a coffee." or whatever...
 

Alphathree

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Originally posted by titoman
wow great advices guys... i think i'll just work out at the gym till friday, say hi to her if i see her, then friday i get to sit with them, then after talking to her a while, i'll try Alphathree's advice, and say "Hey, by the way, are you free this friday? Let's grab a coffee." or whatever...
Do it AS YOU'RE LEAVING like an afterthought. And don't linger. Or stay for a long time. Or be a dumbass.

Actually, just tell me where in the world you're going to do this and send me a PayPal for $1000, and I'll be there in a jiffy to stand next to you and b!tch slap you if you do anything stupid. :D
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Marlimus

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do an actio date. movies are out. anything that involves talking for overly long periods of time is out.

Take her bowling or rollerskating or something that is fun, but doesn't seem like a date cliche.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Alphathree

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Originally posted by titoman
hahaha what city do you live in man? and how old are you?
I'm 22 and I gave you a radius. I'm not giving out my city on an Internet forum. How do I know you're not an axe murderer? Lol

You can PM me your MSN if you want to talk privately.
 
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