"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Tips on text game?

The_Crack

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I've come to the conclusion my text game is horrible.. i get solid replys for the first few, but then it either goes no response or really uninterested responses.
This doesn't happen with ALL girls, but has been happening recently quite frequently..
do you guys have any tips?

i use text to build rapport, and not as a mean to meet up. No one usually picks up their phone when calling, but rather miss it and then text back saying whats up?. So i've been playing out the text game and been getting erratic results.i have some pretty good examples of when my text game worked perfectly, and when i just got no replys
I've been trying to reach a medium of using haha's and !'s, but i might be screwing myself over with the content.. not to sure

Would really love to have a solid discussion on how you guys handle text game and maybe a few tips here and there!
Thanks guys!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

SeymourCake

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Greasy Pig said:
Skimmed through it and I like it. It's a good read.

Also, when you're texting, do NOT use emoticons.

Just yesterday I was watching TV and the women who were answering questions were asked, "How do you feel about co-workers using emoticons in their e-mails"?

They said it was innappropriate and childish. Then they asked if it was lame if men used emoticons in texts, e-mails, IMs, etc.

One responded with, "yes", and the other responded with "kind of".

It's either yes, or no. No "kind of". Kind of = 100% yes.
 

The_Crack

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SeymourCake said:
Skimmed through it and I like it. It's a good read.

Also, when you're texting, do NOT use emoticons.

Just yesterday I was watching TV and the women who were answering questions were asked, "How do you feel about co-workers using emoticons in their e-mails"?

They said it was innappropriate and childish. Then they asked if it was lame if men used emoticons in texts, e-mails, IMs, etc.

One responded with, "yes", and the other responded with "kind of".

It's either yes, or no. No "kind of". Kind of = 100% yes.
what age group were these ladies? i'd assume if you were in your 30s and above emotions would be pretty lame
 

Brighty

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Rule 1: Don't.

Texting is for high school girls. If you want to talk to her, hang out with her. If you can't meet up, call her. If you absolutely have to text, keep it as short and as brief as you can, and for the love of God do not carry on an hour long conversation texting back and forth. Seriously, it reeks of AFC and you'd be surprised how quickly girls start to reach the same conclusion (although they have nicer ways of putting it).

You're a man of action, you have things to do, not waste time texting back and forth making small talk about the same **** she'd text her other girlfriends.

It is too easy to misunderstand tone, humor, meaning, sarcasm, and a multitude of other subtle things we convey when we're actually interacting face to face making the concept of text game volatile and unstable to begin with. I get how its more comfortable and less confrontational, but sack up and put that same effort for improving into your actual game. You'll be glad you did.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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zekko

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Brighty said:
Rule 1: Don't.

Texting is for high school girls.
Okay, but don't be surprised when the guy who does text takes the girl.
As the OP notes, you can use texting to build rapport. And also comfort.

Seriously, if you want to text, text. If you don't want to, don't.
Be true to yourself. But don't say that "texting is for high school girls", it simply isn't accurate.
 

Atom Smasher

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Brighty said:
Rule 1: Don't.

Texting is for high school girls. If you want to talk to her, hang out with her. If you can't meet up, call her. If you absolutely have to text, keep it as short and as brief as you can, and for the love of God do not carry on an hour long conversation texting back and forth. Seriously, it reeks of AFC and you'd be surprised how quickly girls start to reach the same conclusion (although they have nicer ways of putting it).

You're a man of action, you have things to do, not waste time texting back and forth making small talk about the same **** she'd text her other girlfriends.

It is too easy to misunderstand tone, humor, meaning, sarcasm, and a multitude of other subtle things we convey when we're actually interacting face to face making the concept of text game volatile and unstable to begin with. I get how its more comfortable and less confrontational, but sack up and put that same effort for improving into your actual game. You'll be glad you did.
Cosign.

Texting is a dangerous game all the way around because once the genie is out of the bottle, you can't get it back in. She will AMPLIFY and misinterpet much of what you say. We speak entirely different languages, and that difference gets leveraged with texting.

Texting is useful for well thought-placed sniper shots (this implies careful thought and very sparing use). Use it like a machine gun and you will destroy your chances.
 

Atom Smasher

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zekko said:
Okay, but don't be surprised when the guy who does text takes the girl.
As the OP notes, you can use texting to build rapport. And also comfort.

Seriously, if you want to text, text. If you don't want to, don't.
Be true to yourself. But don't say that "texting is for high school girls", it simply isn't accurate.
Anti-cosign. Sorry, Z-man, but I must....

I think the whole purpose of this site is to get rid of the "be true to yourself" mindset and replace it with what works and what doesn't work. What works and doesn't work is determined by the inner workings of the object or subject (in this case, women).

Texting is a lit match in a room full of explosives. One false move and Boom! Used carefully and sparingly it can be leveraged to your advantage.
 

Brighty

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zekko said:
As the OP notes, you can use texting to build rapport. And also comfort.
You can also do this in person, and I guarantee it'll be much more effective and impressive to her.

Seriously, if you want to text, text. If you don't want to, don't.
Be true to yourself. But don't say that "texting is for high school girls", it simply isn't accurate.
I'm not saying you shouldn't text at all, I'm saying that less is more when it comes to texting. If you're texting more than you're hanging out with this girl, then it's a huge problem. Obviously for relationships that's a whole different story, but by and large texting is a convenient crutch that guys have come to rely on as a substitute for having to work on their real game.


Okay, but don't be surprised when the guy who does text takes the girl.
Doubtful, because the reason why the guy texts ad nauseum is because he prefers this way of interacting with her. This way in his mind, he always can say the right things, always know how much to neg or tease, and always be on his game with her because he has time to think and prepare his responses. That way he can get rapport the "easy way" and then reap all of the benefits when they're together in person... or so he likes to think. The reality is is that he's neglecting the larger problem at hand - he doesn't feel comfortable enough to be more forward than words on an iPhone screen.

Girls love confidence, and they're extremely perceptive. If the majority of your interactions are through texting, she is going to notice and draw her own conclusions as to why.

Like I said, it's a crutch. You don't need it. Stop relying on the crutch and you'll find out you can walk just fine. Force yourself to be more proactive and to stop relying on texts to get the job done and work on improving your confidence and charisma in person. You'll be better for it, and being able to be comfortable in social situations and in your zone is an invaluable skill that goes way beyond just meeting women.

That's my take, anyway, based off my own experiences.
 

incognito42

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SeymourCake said:
Skimmed through it and I like it. It's a good read.

Also, when you're texting, do NOT use emoticons.

Just yesterday I was watching TV and the women who were answering questions were asked, "How do you feel about co-workers using emoticons in their e-mails"?

They said it was innappropriate and childish. Then they asked if it was lame if men used emoticons in texts, e-mails, IMs, etc.

One responded with, "yes", and the other responded with "kind of".

It's either yes, or no. No "kind of". Kind of = 100% yes.
Some chicks like it and some don't. Tone is sometimes hArd to read via text, and using emoticons really helps with some chicks

I'd say some tips are...

- less is almost always more

- almost alwYs text with a purpose (getting nudes, setting up dates, and depending how you met or how long youve known her you can use it go build a little rapport. I use rApport lightly I mainly mean text just enough to put a certain image of you in her head but be sure notto over do it. Save rPport building for when you're together in person)

- use subtle sexual innuendos and try to portray yourself as having good energy and being fun
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Pimp-sicle

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The_Crack said:
i use text to build rapport, and not as a mean to meet up

That's your problem right there.

As Brighty pointed out, build rapport in person; it has a much greater/lasting effect and will thereby make the girl initiate contact and respond to your texts more often and regularly.

If your carrying on full on conversations with text your on the fast track to nowhere unless her interest is already very high in you.

I do disagree with those saying not to text period; texting can be very effective and save time when done right. It should be quick, and after a little banter to the point.

If your not getting responses via text its not because of your text game specifically, its because their interest isn't high enough. Which means your ACTUAL game needs works.

If you do your job right when you meet them, the rest will take care of itself.








PIMP
 

bigneil

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Texting is good for measuring her interest level. If she likes you she will initiate - a lot. The key is to have the MINIMAL (your) text to (her) putting out ratio.

To achieve this, you have to put it all on the line. When she says "how r u?" you reply "be here Friday at 9PM because it's time for your bath".

If she replies "LOL ok" you are in like (Errol) Flynn.
 

SoSuave666

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Man, I didn't have time to read all the posts on here, so sorry if my answer is replicated elsewhere.

The key to text game is patience. I don't care if you have nothing else going on in your life, if you're texting someone the person who texts less-frequent is the one in control. Now don't get me wrong, you can initiate, respond, what have you. But if you are the type of person who sends back/back messages or texts with the frequency of an 8 year old girl scout, you're in trouble.

Set up the date, bang, call, repeat. It's a simple formula. The more you text, the more you amplify your flake-rate
 

The_Crack

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Thanks alot guys, SO MUCH good advice in this thread!!
less is good is pretty much the general consensus, i'm going to start implementing it! Also going to stop beating around the bush and trying to build rapport through text, and go straight in for the meet up after 1-3 texts.

But in honesty, my problem usually arises when the number i get is a quick number straight of the bat. No rapport has been built up, most likely due to some different situation and i get her number and have to bail. So i usually
Text her later in the day or next day, build some rapport and then try the meet! Its been giving me erratic results, maybe cause i have been texting to much..
gonna stick with the short concise texts with a bit of teasing.
Cheers fellas :)
love this forum
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

zekko

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Brighty said:
Doubtful, because the reason why the guy texts ad nauseum is because he prefers this way of interacting with her.
Well, nowhere did I say you should text a girl ad nauseum. I'm saying don't refuse to text just because SoSuave tells you it's unmanly. I also don't think that the ability to use text means that you can't interact in person. In fact, if you have good people skills, you should be able to communicate that both in person and in text. Don't be afraid to have a little playful back and forth.

Usually these guys who say you should never text and should maintain mystery are the same guys who complain about girls flaking on them. If you get a girl's number, texting allows you to build some comfort and rapport before you have your meetup, lessening the chance for a flake. Here's an extreme example, but if you are a total mystery, she has no idea who you are, you may be a serial killer for all she knows. Why should she meet up with you?

Atom Smasher said:
I think the whole purpose of this site is to get rid of the "be true to yourself" mindset and replace it with what works and what doesn't work. What works and doesn't work is determined by the inner workings of the object or subject (in this case, women).
I respect your opinion, Smasher, but I am actually an advocate of "be true to yourself". Improve yourself whenever you can (by not being an AFC/pvssy). But I think you should remain essentially true to yourself. Especially when it comes to something as trivial and unimportant as texting. Text if you want, don't text if you don't want. Some girls will be attracted to you, some girls won't. Appreciate the ones that do for their good taste, and let the others fall by the wayside.
 

NobodyCares1

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I don't get some guys saying here that you should only use texts for setting up a dates. That might work on some age group and in some regions, but for example here where I live if I want to set up a date too soon after meeting her, let's say I met her a week ago, we texted twice and I want a date... SHE WILL REFUSE... on the other hand, when I text with her a bit more, build some rapport she will ask ME out. Now I'm not saying that you should wait until they ask you out, but some girls just won't go out with you without some rapport and if you ask them out too soon they even might lose interest.
 
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zekko

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NobodyCares1 said:
let's say I met her a week ago, we texted twice and I want a date... SHE WILL REFUSE... on the other hand, when I text with her a bit more, build some rapport they will ask ME out.
^^^
This.
 

Zerro

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If she's already using emoticons then feel free to use them as well. Especially if you're ever being sarcastic, without hearing tone of voice such things can easily just sound mean and put her off.

zekko said:
Well, nowhere did I say you should text a girl ad nauseum. I'm saying don't refuse to text just because SoSuave tells you it's unmanly. I also don't think that the ability to use text means that you can't interact in person. In fact, if you have good people skills, you should be able to communicate that both in person and in text. Don't be afraid to have a little playful back and forth.

Usually these guys who say you should never text and should maintain mystery are the same guys who complain about girls flaking on them. If you get a girl's number, texting allows you to build some comfort and rapport before you have your meetup, lessening the chance for a flake. Here's an extreme example, but if you are a total mystery, she has no idea who you are, you may be a serial killer for all she knows. Why should she meet up with you?
Building comfort first is key, especially if you don't have mutual friends to vouch for you. I've had it before where another guy got the girl not because he was better looking than me or more confident but because her friends already knew him so he was pre-approved. If you don't have that in you need to create it before she'll agree to a date.
 

SamTheHobit

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Zekko seems to be spot on.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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