WestCoaster
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 8, 2003
- Messages
- 2,028
- Reaction score
- 31
OK, JSH encouraged me to post here and I must admit I'm very impressed with the dialog going on in the high school forum. There's a post on the mature man site (I'm about twice your age) that I started in how the main board has gone south. This board thankfully hasn't gone south.
I post here today because I used to be a mixed up AFC in high school, college and beyond. Luckily I caught myself later on in life ... this website helped. So I'll give you a few rules from experience and from watching my friends' mistakes. I've never been married, but have had plenty of girlfriends (good and bad) and dated up a storm so I think I have some insight. Trust me, with this website you are WAY ahead of the game. I never had this when I was your age. If I did, I never would've been an AFC.
Some rules for the road:
1. No woman is worth your self-esteem: I don't care how hot she is, I don't care how nice she is. I don't care if you think she's the "one." Not one woman on this planet is worth obsessing over or contemplating self-harm after a break-up. Your life is too valuable.
2. Take ownership in this life of yours. Work on your education, career, confidence, hobbies, interests FIRST before chasing women. My friends who put women first are now in miserable jobs AND marriages. Women are attracted to men who have their own lives. Top managers, CEOs, presidents of companies, and successful men focused on their inner qualities and careers first. I'm on my second career and have been in two highly competitive professions. The guys obsessing over women are unfocused, mixed up and not going anywhere. The guys focused on their inner qualities and career are moving forward in life.
3. Break-ups happen, hurt happens ... learn to move on. This is a tough one. When I was an AFC it took me a wasted year of my life to bounce back from a break-up. Frankly, the woman wasn't worth that. I want that year back! I was in a funk for 12 freakin' months. It's not worth it. Acknowledge the pain, understand it, even feel it ... don't let it linger. Go out and get some excercize, develop a new hobby, hang with friends. Again, no woman is worth this pain. You may think she is; she isn't.
4. Women change ... sometimes for the worse. This is why you shouldn't obsess. That hottie who is controlling your emotions may someday turn into a nottie ... as in not-hot, not-fit, not-nice, and not-smart. Again, don't obsess.
5. Always treat yourself and women with class. If a woman doesn't like being treated with class and likes only abusing "bad boys" she is not for you. And you'll watch her multiple divorces down the road. If you treat yourself with respect, CLASSY women will gravitate towards you.
.... Probably stuff you already know, but it's stuff I wish I knew when I was your age. Read the DJ Bible or variations of it posted on this board. A lot of that is golden. Read the "Kiss of Death" article written by Allen Thompson on this site.
Take ownership in your self. Women are the spice of life, but not the main meal.
I post here today because I used to be a mixed up AFC in high school, college and beyond. Luckily I caught myself later on in life ... this website helped. So I'll give you a few rules from experience and from watching my friends' mistakes. I've never been married, but have had plenty of girlfriends (good and bad) and dated up a storm so I think I have some insight. Trust me, with this website you are WAY ahead of the game. I never had this when I was your age. If I did, I never would've been an AFC.
Some rules for the road:
1. No woman is worth your self-esteem: I don't care how hot she is, I don't care how nice she is. I don't care if you think she's the "one." Not one woman on this planet is worth obsessing over or contemplating self-harm after a break-up. Your life is too valuable.
2. Take ownership in this life of yours. Work on your education, career, confidence, hobbies, interests FIRST before chasing women. My friends who put women first are now in miserable jobs AND marriages. Women are attracted to men who have their own lives. Top managers, CEOs, presidents of companies, and successful men focused on their inner qualities and careers first. I'm on my second career and have been in two highly competitive professions. The guys obsessing over women are unfocused, mixed up and not going anywhere. The guys focused on their inner qualities and career are moving forward in life.
3. Break-ups happen, hurt happens ... learn to move on. This is a tough one. When I was an AFC it took me a wasted year of my life to bounce back from a break-up. Frankly, the woman wasn't worth that. I want that year back! I was in a funk for 12 freakin' months. It's not worth it. Acknowledge the pain, understand it, even feel it ... don't let it linger. Go out and get some excercize, develop a new hobby, hang with friends. Again, no woman is worth this pain. You may think she is; she isn't.
4. Women change ... sometimes for the worse. This is why you shouldn't obsess. That hottie who is controlling your emotions may someday turn into a nottie ... as in not-hot, not-fit, not-nice, and not-smart. Again, don't obsess.
5. Always treat yourself and women with class. If a woman doesn't like being treated with class and likes only abusing "bad boys" she is not for you. And you'll watch her multiple divorces down the road. If you treat yourself with respect, CLASSY women will gravitate towards you.
.... Probably stuff you already know, but it's stuff I wish I knew when I was your age. Read the DJ Bible or variations of it posted on this board. A lot of that is golden. Read the "Kiss of Death" article written by Allen Thompson on this site.
Take ownership in your self. Women are the spice of life, but not the main meal.
