INXS
Don Juan
It seems like lots of guys lack good topics or ideas for the first date conversation. While there is certainly not a set "in stone" design/layout for the first date conversation, there are some things to do and some things to avoid.
Here are some worth mentioning:
1)Don't talk about the lame borrrrrring stuff (IE- Your car/your job/how much money you make!) Ahhhh. Every guy talks about that stupid crap. Be orignal.
2)Don't break eye contact first UNLESS you look away to something more interesting then her. (On a first date I would advise against looking at a more attractive woman.)
3)This tip is something you would do before the actual date itself, however it is a powerhouse when done right, so take good notes. It is good to be social. If you are social, and perhaps another woman sees you out and says hi, say hi back. Don't feel like the woman will automatically throw you into this dark hole of "He is a player." If anything, she will wonder what it is about you that other women like, and if other women like you, this will give you bonus points. (This is true with more then just women when you think about it. Suppose you have something that you know your friend really wants, won't you value it more? Exactly! Same thing here.)
4)TREAT HER WITH RAPPORT. This one is probably the most important. If you act insecure and unsure of what to say, she will pick up on that and respond that way to you. However, if you just act comfortable, and like you are with someone you have known your whole life, she will pick up on that and respond that way. (IE - Instead of saying "Nice to meet you" say, "Hi, how are you?" Even little things like that make a BIG difference in the long run.)
5) Don't EVER EVER EVER ask her "What do you want to do?" or have the date unplanned. This is like wuss squared behavior and women by and large don't like it. All this shows is one or two things, if not both. 1)It shows that you are insecure and couldn't think of something you thought she would like and were too worried about her enjoying herself, instead of you enjoying yourself. 2)It shows that you didn't give the date much thought if you leave it all to her. Here is a technique I have used that works well for me: If I am hungry or thirsty on a date - I say "I am hungry/thirsty. Lets get something to drink/eat." This says all the right things. It says, we are doing it because I want to, and I have the power, as opposed to being a wuss and asking "So...are you hungry?" And honestly, what woman is going to say "I am starving." Get real.
6)I mentioned eating, so while on the subject, here is another. DON'T TAKE HER OUT TO DINNER ON A FIRST DATE. A great conversation isn't built around food. It is built around an interesting environment. (IE - Mall / Park / Interesting Place) but not a resturant. Get real. And beyond that, taking a woman for an expensive dinner for a first date, says all the wrong things. It is almost like saying: "I don't think you would go out with me, just to get to know me, so lets have dinner, and I hope as a side effect of us having dinner, you will get to know me in the process and hopefully like me." Ewwww. This is just BAD BAD BAD. DON'T DO IT.
6.5) If you insist upon taking her to dinner (Wuss!) then I would say, do it somewhere that ISN'T expensive. Don't make it about the money. Once money gets into the picture - it is NOT good. Or, mention that you are eating, because once you again you are hungry and not like it is some way to impress her.
7) Be interesting. Get into Palm reading or hand writing analysis. This stuff is very interesting to women. Learn it. (And you might actually get into this stuff yourself. You never know.)
8)Don't ditch the ****y and funny once you are out with her. This isn't the time to be "Mr. Romance." Just keep being the guy she liked, and agreeded to go out with.
9)Send mixed signals. This is good stuff. Hold her hand some of the time, act like you are into her and then say something like "I am glad we are friends." This will totally throw her off gaurd.
10)Lean back if you are sitting down and act confident. Don't put your head down when walking!!! Act secure. I don't care if you have to fake it at first. Practice by putting a book on your head and making sure you can carry it without it falling. If it falls you must be looking down, and this is bad!
11)Don't cuss. DUH.
12)Good Hygiene Please.
I'm sure there are more..lets keep the list going......
Here are some worth mentioning:
1)Don't talk about the lame borrrrrring stuff (IE- Your car/your job/how much money you make!) Ahhhh. Every guy talks about that stupid crap. Be orignal.
2)Don't break eye contact first UNLESS you look away to something more interesting then her. (On a first date I would advise against looking at a more attractive woman.)
3)This tip is something you would do before the actual date itself, however it is a powerhouse when done right, so take good notes. It is good to be social. If you are social, and perhaps another woman sees you out and says hi, say hi back. Don't feel like the woman will automatically throw you into this dark hole of "He is a player." If anything, she will wonder what it is about you that other women like, and if other women like you, this will give you bonus points. (This is true with more then just women when you think about it. Suppose you have something that you know your friend really wants, won't you value it more? Exactly! Same thing here.)
4)TREAT HER WITH RAPPORT. This one is probably the most important. If you act insecure and unsure of what to say, she will pick up on that and respond that way to you. However, if you just act comfortable, and like you are with someone you have known your whole life, she will pick up on that and respond that way. (IE - Instead of saying "Nice to meet you" say, "Hi, how are you?" Even little things like that make a BIG difference in the long run.)
5) Don't EVER EVER EVER ask her "What do you want to do?" or have the date unplanned. This is like wuss squared behavior and women by and large don't like it. All this shows is one or two things, if not both. 1)It shows that you are insecure and couldn't think of something you thought she would like and were too worried about her enjoying herself, instead of you enjoying yourself. 2)It shows that you didn't give the date much thought if you leave it all to her. Here is a technique I have used that works well for me: If I am hungry or thirsty on a date - I say "I am hungry/thirsty. Lets get something to drink/eat." This says all the right things. It says, we are doing it because I want to, and I have the power, as opposed to being a wuss and asking "So...are you hungry?" And honestly, what woman is going to say "I am starving." Get real.
6)I mentioned eating, so while on the subject, here is another. DON'T TAKE HER OUT TO DINNER ON A FIRST DATE. A great conversation isn't built around food. It is built around an interesting environment. (IE - Mall / Park / Interesting Place) but not a resturant. Get real. And beyond that, taking a woman for an expensive dinner for a first date, says all the wrong things. It is almost like saying: "I don't think you would go out with me, just to get to know me, so lets have dinner, and I hope as a side effect of us having dinner, you will get to know me in the process and hopefully like me." Ewwww. This is just BAD BAD BAD. DON'T DO IT.
6.5) If you insist upon taking her to dinner (Wuss!) then I would say, do it somewhere that ISN'T expensive. Don't make it about the money. Once money gets into the picture - it is NOT good. Or, mention that you are eating, because once you again you are hungry and not like it is some way to impress her.
7) Be interesting. Get into Palm reading or hand writing analysis. This stuff is very interesting to women. Learn it. (And you might actually get into this stuff yourself. You never know.)
8)Don't ditch the ****y and funny once you are out with her. This isn't the time to be "Mr. Romance." Just keep being the guy she liked, and agreeded to go out with.
9)Send mixed signals. This is good stuff. Hold her hand some of the time, act like you are into her and then say something like "I am glad we are friends." This will totally throw her off gaurd.
10)Lean back if you are sitting down and act confident. Don't put your head down when walking!!! Act secure. I don't care if you have to fake it at first. Practice by putting a book on your head and making sure you can carry it without it falling. If it falls you must be looking down, and this is bad!
11)Don't cuss. DUH.
12)Good Hygiene Please.
I'm sure there are more..lets keep the list going......
