Tips for breaking up

[cracengl]

I guess I'm being a wuss about this, but I have this girlfriend that I can't bring myself to break up with. I know I want to, but I know it's not going to be pretty and I don't want the guilt.

She's just not what I'm looking for, physically or mentally. I have no mental connection; while she is not that bad looking, she doesn't do a thing for me. When we have sex, I cannot get off to save my life. It's impossible. And she doesn't seem to be into it.

Basically, I'm just having trouble because I know she's going to resent having sex with me and then me dumb her. I don't want to hurt her, but I just don't want to be around her. She's been ****ed over too many times and I guess I think she's gonna be all depressed.

The more I write this, the more I feel like I need to not worry about her so much, but I'm open to suggestions and/or strategies to soften the blow.

 

[-HPNOTIQ-]

Every guy on here is going to give you advice like he's a comedian..

"Tell her your gay"
"Tell her you are sleeping with her mom"
"Tell her you have 4 testicles..that should scare her"

Yada Yada Yada.

Bro..all you have to do is be straight with her. You don't have to be brutally honest by telling her that having sex with a empty Coke bottle is more enjoyable than her...but..

Lay out the facts.

Say: Hey..I'm not going to lie to you..but the chemistry is gone. I care about you and don't want to waste anymore of your time or my time in a relationship that isn't working in the first place.

Simple and to the point.

Reassure her that you plan on keeping your business with her private..so she doesn't have to worry about any gossip...and if people ask what happened, you'll just tell them it didn't work out and leave it at that.

This makes it easier for you and her to start off fresh without that 'he said she said' gossip that comes out of many break ups.

Do it right...and if you want it...you may just have a good f*ck buddy for a couple months until you find some fresh meat.

 

[GirlCrazy]

Just tell her that the relationship is not what you're looking for and leave it at that.

The less you say to her about it, the less she will have to obsess over and second guess herself.

The last thing you want is to give her a laundry list of why she's not good enough to be with you.

 

[cracengl]

thank you

I actually did it pretty much like you all said before I got a chance to check the responses. It just worked out that way.

I will have no **** buddy out of this one. Actually the thought of that sickens me because the lack of any kind of pleasurable sex that resulted in this relationship had a lot to do with its demise.

But thanks for the advice! I just told her I didn't have it in me to be as serious as she wanted and didn't have the time really. I tried to build her up as much as possible as well. I wanted to make an effort to keep her from feeling bad about herself; at the very least I thinK I showed her she has more to look forward to, as we are both young.

Thanks, and later.