"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Timesinks

mikhailsadvice

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Hi everyone, today I talk about 3 major timesinks in life and the extent to which they waste it - antisocial media, television, and gaming. While relaxing with some mindless entertainment is perfectly fine, too many people underestimate the impact it has on their overall life. When you add up a few minutes here and there, you end up with months over the course of a year. I provide specific examples and illustrate the vicious cycle it creates. Enjoy & discuss!

EDIT: I should note that spending too much time on dating sites for example is just as bad of a timesink.

 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Yewki

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Everything is timesink. Life is a long series of timesinks. Participate as much as possible in timesinks which you have a passion for and bring you happiness. Only the empty timesinks that serve no other purpose than pass the time are a waste.
 

ubercat

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Haha SS is one of my time sinks which sadly I'm going to have to cut down as I have a new girlfriend and and the heat is on at work. Don't regret it I've learnt a lot here and I like to give back a little.

I agree with @Yewki . Learning a language or how to play guitar is a huge time sink but it's also an exercise in will power so you'll be a better man at the end of it
 

mikhailsadvice

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Everything is timesink. Life is a long series of timesinks. Participate as much as possible in timesinks which you have a passion for and bring you happiness. Only the empty timesinks that serve no other purpose than pass the time are a waste.
I think you misunderstand. The implication of a 'timesink' is that it has no long term benefits - that's the difference.

Learning another language (I'm bilingual since 7) and playing a musical instrument (I can draw like a beast, but I did learn piano) both have HUGE mental development benefits. You think more creatively, efficiently, logically, and that has very long term benefits and implications.
 

Alvafe

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I think you misunderstand. The implication of a 'timesink' is that it has no long term benefits - that's the difference.

Learning another language (I'm bilingual since 7) and playing a musical instrument (I can draw like a beast, but I did learn piano) both have HUGE mental development benefits. You think more creatively, efficiently, logically, and that has very long term benefits and implications.
and what make you think others timesinks don't also give such things? for me drawing and music are useless, I don't see a damn usefullness on this.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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mikhailsadvice

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Art/music develop parts of your brain that video games and television don't, for starters.

And fringe benefits. You can play guitar at a party and everyone will love you. Start talking about gaming and who cares.
 

Alvafe

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Art/music develop parts of your brain that video games and television don't, for starters.

And fringe benefits. You can play guitar at a party and everyone will love you. Start talking about gaming and who cares.
everything you do develop something, televison I don't even care anymore, video games? meh I can pull some games talk here and there and people care, why? its pertinent, if you want to be a show off seeking validation of people you hardly know to be liked, then I prefer to be the dude then people stop to listen he talks because he have something interesting to say
 

Yewki

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I think you misunderstand. The implication of a 'timesink' is that it has no long term benefits - that's the difference.
Anything you have a passion for can provide a long term benefit

Start talking about gaming and who cares
The people you're talking to who share the same passion would probably care. But your assumption that other people must care for your activity to have a long term benefit is unfounded anyways
 

Amilz

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Art/music develop parts of your brain that video games and television don't, for starters.

And fringe benefits. You can play guitar at a party and everyone will love you. Start talking about gaming and who cares.
Logical is being able to look at things without bias. And no that is not true. Video game tourneys can fill stadiums in South Korea. Some of the players are celebrities. To say games don't develop the brain the same way art/ music does well that's obvious. Playing basketball develops muscles in ways playing baseball doesn't. The brain is complex. It develops from a multitude of experiences.
 

mikhailsadvice

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Logical is being able to look at things without bias. And no that is not true. Video game tourneys can fill stadiums in South Korea. Some of the players are celebrities. To say games don't develop the brain the same way art/ music does well that's obvious. Playing basketball develops muscles in ways playing baseball doesn't. The brain is complex. It develops from a multitude of experiences.
Observational bias with little info to go one. Here's something to consider:

1) Do you live in Korea?
2) Do you want to spend 16-18 hours/day playing video games and nothing else?
3) Do you also want to have the same chance at stardom as an olympic medalist or first draft pro sport player? Esports is no different, in fact the competition is even tighter. There are less than 20 people in the entire world for any given game who are of the same caliber.
4) Do you want to look like a pro gamer? Don't think the handful of 'celebrities' get to do much with it. Not if they want to be celebrities next season.

There's actually a good documentary on Netflix called 'All Work All Play' check it out.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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Yewki

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Observational bias with little info to go one. Here's something to consider:

1) Do you live in Korea?
2) Do you want to spend 16-18 hours/day playing video games and nothing else?
3) Do you also want to have the same chance at stardom as an olympic medalist or first draft pro sport player? Esports is no different, in fact the competition is even tighter. There are less than 20 people in the entire world for any given game who are of the same caliber.
4) Do you want to look like a pro gamer? Don't think the handful of 'celebrities' get to do much with it. Not if they want to be celebrities next season.

There's actually a good documentary on Netflix called 'All Work All Play' check it out.
Why do you have to be a renown, top caliber player to have a passion for it?
 

Amilz

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Observational bias with little info to go one. Here's something to consider:

1) Do you live in Korea?
2) Do you want to spend 16-18 hours/day playing video games and nothing else?
3) Do you also want to have the same chance at stardom as an olympic medalist or first draft pro sport player? Esports is no different, in fact the competition is even tighter. There are less than 20 people in the entire world for any given game who are of the same caliber.
4) Do you want to look like a pro gamer? Don't think the handful of 'celebrities' get to do much with it. Not if they want to be celebrities next season.

There's actually a good documentary on Netflix called 'All Work All Play' check it out.
No, I don't live in Korea but I've been in involved in Esports for many years. I've played against some of the best players in the world who make a living playing games. You assume I don't know much about Esports. Chess is a game. Are master chess players wasting their time?

Not all pros spend time playing like that. Some people like board games that take weeks to complete. It's a social thing, and something creative to do with others. You are taking it to the extreme as if playing at all is the same as playing 10 hours a day. There are lots of very good players that don't even come close to half of what you stated in hours played per day. Did you get all your observations about esports from this documentary?
 
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Amilz

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Why do you have to be a renown, top caliber player to have a passion for it?
Some of this is baiting. I don't think this topic was really meant to be discussed. It's kind of a "I have the answer and here is why thread".
 

mikhailsadvice

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No you don't have to be a pro to be passionate. But you do have to be a pro to be 'famous', which is the only positive case you make for it.

I play video games too, probably about 10 hrs/week, after/if I get all the important stuff done. I realize it's not beneficial in any way, like television. That's ok. I'm talking about excessive play, like 20 hrs+. You can easily log 20 hours on a weekend without sacrificing sleep/food/etc .. and that's a wasted weekend. A lot of people do that.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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