Time to call back?

[slaog]

Ok I went on a date which was good and bad. It was a long date and started out well she smiled when she saw me and there was plenty of eye contact and laughing etc. We went for a meal and the same but towards the end of it we were both tired and the conversation didn't flow as much.

I was calm and cool on the date and didn't come on too strong to the point I don't know if she knows I was interested though there was plenty of eye contact as I said. So we hugged goodbye and I said I'd call her during the week...

I think I'm getting oneitis again even though I have a few plates but she is very nice. So I have 3 questions

Q1: When dates go very well and sometimes level off what does that mean? As I said we were both tired after a long day.
Q2: When would be the best time to conact her?
Q3: Is it best to always show you are interested or pretent you are not interested?

 

[jophil28]

Q1: When dates go very well and sometimes level off what does that mean? As I said we were both tired after a long day.
Q2: When would be the best time to conact her?
Q3: Is it best to always show you are interested or pretent you are not interested?

Q1: Things level off for all sorts of reasons. It does not mean much ar all. Perhaps you stayed together too long. There is some thinking around which promotes the belief that you should leave her on an upbeat note.

Q2: Contact her when YOU feel ready. Somewhere between 2-3 days is about right. This is NOT an exact science and it never will be. Do what feels right for you .

Q3: Women are interested in men who are interested in them . However it all comes down to the WAY that you express your interest. NO late night calls, no early morning calls. No whiney "hallmark card" messages on her Voicemail.

Just say things in a manly way. NO long stories about your ex or how she hurt you. No "i had a rough childhood" stories either.

THis is the time to set the frame and begin to lead her .
YOu do not have to "pretend" anything at all - all that PUA mind game stuff is pathetic .Grown men playing mindgames like cunning women - geez !
However, there are some things that are always helpful -
The 3 C's always apply--
Confidence,Control(of your emotions) and Challenge ( reveal yourself slowly)
Remember this - she is only ONE woman in an ocean of others..

Good hunting.

 

[slaog]

Thank you jophil28!

I won't contact her tonight I'll wait till tomorrow night which will be 2 days after seeing her.

What I will do tonight - and I'm wondering if it's a good idea - is to send her an email I have of funny animal photos because she likes animals. So although I won't be there I have left something that has little effort to send but it's the thought that counts as they say.

 

[jophil28]

Thank you jophil28!

I won't contact her tonight I'll wait till tomorrow night which will be 2 days after seeing her.

What I will do tonight - and I'm wondering if it's a good idea - is to send her an email I have of funny animal photos because she likes animals. So although I won't be there I have left something that has little effort to send but it's the thought that counts as they say.

Funny Animals ? Kinda corny dude- your mission in the first few weeks is to build ATTRACTION and RAPPORT. Maybe you need to understand a little more about what qualities women find attractive. Here is a clue- women like FUNNY men who are confident enough to say amusing things without fear of offending her. THis is probably the opposite of what you would normally do . MOst of us used to tippy-toe around watching our mouths - just like Mother said.
Nah - do the opposite amd watch her interest level rise up..

 

[slaog]

Funny Animals ? Kinda corny dude- your mission in the first few weeks is to build ATTRACTION and RAPPORT. Maybe you need to understand a little more about what qualities women find attractive. Here is a clue- women like FUNNY men who are confident enough to say amusing things without fear of offending her. THis is probably the opposite of what you would normally do . MOst of us used to tippy-toe around watching out mouths - just like Mother said.
Nah - do the opposite amd watch her interest level rise up..

Yeah I think you're probably right. I have other funny emails that are more adult but I won't bother sending them or contacting her.

She's very laid back and for the date I wasn't texting her at all. She just text me on both days before hand to ask was the date still on. Ironically then I hadn't much interest in her....

I'm a bit worried that if I don't contact her she'll delete me but thats my old logic getting in the way!!

 

[guru1000]

Funny Animals ? Kinda corny dude- your mission in the first few weeks is to build ATTRACTION and RAPPORT. Maybe you need to understand a little more about what qualities women find attractive. Here is a clue- women like FUNNY men who are confident enough to say amusing things without fear of offending her. THis is probably the opposite of what you would normally do . MOst of us used to tippy-toe around watching out mouths - just like Mother said.
Nah - do the opposite amd watch her interest level rise up..

Bang on. Let us look a little deeper into the rabbit hole.

The key word here is FEAR.

If you do not FEAR losing her, your actions will be congruent with your mindset and gut. In other words, you will NATURALLY be in the flow of building Attraction.

Attraction can be summed up as "I WANT you, but I dont NEED you".

How does this work?

A woman wants to feel GOOD; she wants to feel WANTED.

BUT

She does not want to feel NEEDED initially. That is an attraction killer.

Why is initially feeling NEEDED an attraction killer? It covertly shows you lack options. What girl wants a man with no options?

The more options you Overtly and Covertly display, the more Desirable you will appear.

The best way to Covertly display an Abundant mindset (mindset of options) is to be Abundant. Yet if you are not Genuinely Abundant, you must initially Believe you are. This will be congruent with future manifestations of displayed covert options.

When a girl sees no FEAR in your interaction, she sees a man with CHOICE. A man with options certainly does not Fear a woman's opinion of him. An Abundant man simply does not NEED because he has a harem of women DYING to be with him.

The question of "What do I do Next?" is a Pedestaling question. Why would you NEED to care? The one who is Most concerned about what to do next is the one who is pedestaling the other.

You already lose the battle before it began.

This is not about ATTAINING the woman. This is about CONTROLLING your thought process in relation to the frame. Be conscience of the frame, and surely all the answers to your questions will come naturally.

 

[NickSCFC2000]

Q1: When dates go very well and sometimes level off what does that mean? As I said we were both tired after a long day.
Q2: When would be the best time to conact her?
Q3: Is it best to always show you are interested or pretent you are not interested?

1. Not your fault she can't keep a conversation running.
2. She might contact you, sometimes girls will txt me right after a date saying they can't wait to meet me again, sometimes they're shy.
3. If she acted like she wasn't interested in you during the date, you'd think she was a right loser for spending time with you.

 

[slaog]

Thanks for all the replies gentlemen!

Tried to contact her today and it looks like she's avoiding me. She said she's very busy "this week" and hopes to talk to me next week "if all goes well".. and to make matters worse she sent it via email and not even text.

I'd doubt it's a sh!t test too...

I'm very depressed to be honest cause I thought the date went well... she was laughing through it and seemed in good form but it fizzled out near the end alright. Second time feeling like this in a month and it's really getting me down.

I know I shouldn't feel this way and I knew I shouldn't put her on a pedestal but how do you do it??? I tried not to but I put her on the pedestal!!

 

[cordoncordon]

Then just take her off the pedestal like that guy took the crystal skull of the gay azz aliens in what was the worst movie I have seen in a LONGGG while, "Indiana Jones and the crusade of the crystal gay skull"!

Internet dates are hard to read. Since you haven't met up before hand, its hard to judge chemistry..which is everything in dating. So when you first meet up, that is thing that you go by. Unless someone is a total idiot or a monster, most people will stick the date out, be polite, and have the best time they can even if they arent into you. Thats why you can't judge how well a first internet date went until you have a second one lol.

Chances are she just wasnt that into you and this is her way of being polite. I mean lets face it, if it was Brad Pitt she went out with instead of you, trust me she would find the time to talk to and see you this week.

NEXT!

 

[slaog]

Then just take her off the pedestal like that guy took the crystal skull of the gay azz aliens in what was the worst movie I have seen in a LONGGG while, "Indiana Jones and the crusade of the crystal gay skull"!

Internet dates are hard to read. Since you haven't met up before hand, its hard to judge chemistry..which is everything in dating. So when you first meet up, that is thing that you go by. Unless someone is a total idiot or a monster, most people will stick the date out, be polite, and have the best time they can even if they arent into you. Thats why you can't judge how well a first internet date went until you have a second one lol.

Chances are she just wasnt that into you and this is her way of being polite. I mean lets face it, if it was Brad Pitt she went out with instead of you, trust me she would find the time to talk to and see you this week.

NEXT!

Theres something within me that puts women on pedestals. I don't like 99% of women but the ones I do like are so few I automatically put them on pedestals.

I'm talking about a certain mindset. I try not to act like it but it comes out eventually.

I've accepted it's over now. You're right that she'd find time if she was interested.

 

[guru1000]

If you want to KNOCK women off their pedestal, you MUST bring Abundance into your life.

Stop shooting for the cream of the crop. Shot shooting for ONE. Throw your net in the water and catch many.

You cannot CATCH a good one, unless you are an experienced fisherman. Experienced guys catch many and do not look for the great white shark.

When you are experienced and the great white shark makes an appearance, you will be secure enough BACKED by your positive experiences to give it the good ol' hook, line and sinker.

Remember, FIRST a boxer trains. Then he fights many chumps before he is GRANTED a title fight. Had he just jumped into the title fight, how successful would he be?

I speak to you from experience. I have dated many 9-9.5s. I as well dated alot of 7's and 8's. When my confidence is down, I don't jump into a 10.

As we speak, I just dumped an exclusive 9.5 on her ass for not jumping through hoops for me. I do not regret it as I know there are many more out there. Does that mean I only shoot for 9's+? Absolutely not. I date them all and if one PROVES worthy enough, she is rewarded with exclusivity.

Keep your chin up and keep dating.

 

[slaog]

If you want to KNOCK women off their pedestal, you MUST bring Abundance into your life.

Stop shooting for the cream of the crop. Shot shooting for ONE. Throw your net in the water and catch many.

You cannot CATCH a good one, unless you are an experienced fisherman. Experienced guys catch many and do not look for the great white shark.

When you are experienced and the great white shark makes an appearance, you will be secure enough BACKED by your positive experiences to give it the good ol' hook, line and sinker.

Remember, FIRST a boxer trains. Then he fights many chumps before he is GRANTED a title fight. Had he just jumped into the title fight, how successful would he be?

I speak to you from experience. I have dated many 9-9.5s. I as well dated alot of 7's and 8's. When my confidence is down, I don't jump into a 10.

As we speak, I just dumped an exclusive 9.5 on her ass for not jumping through hoops for me. I do not regret it as I know there are many more out there. Does that mean I only shoot for 9's+? Absolutely not. I date them all and if one PROVES worthy enough, she is rewarded with exclusivity.

Keep your chin up and keep dating.

Yeah you're probably right. I'm the sort who is either interested in somebody or not so i have to change that.

You're right about the FEAR of losing. The other day before we met I was on top of the world and confident and it started off good but as I got to like her I sensed a fear of losing her. Something I'll keep in mind next time.

I woke up the morning and felt like it was all a bad dream. Feeling disconnected from everything today. It's a horrible feeling but I'll bounce back stronger I usually do.