"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Time for a field report

McKindley

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There aren't many of these anymore, so here's what's up with me.

This past weekend I went to a party. A cute girl showed up so I kinoed her. Generally enjoyed ourselves and she warmed up. At the end of the night I asked for the number and got shot down.

Which is cool. At least she didn't give it to me and ignore me when I call, which has happened in the past.

I know what I did wrong. I just read her wrong. She warmed up to me, but obviously wasn't terribly attracted to me (I'm a really fun guy, so I have a problem where girls just want to be friends, sound familiar?) I went for the number anyway (hey, the worst thing she could do is say no, right?) Me and the guys got a big laugh out of it anyway.

Another situation that turned out better:

So a few weeks ago I was over at a friend's house I used to hang out with in High School.

We we're watching a movie, and she was cuddled up with me. I knew she wanted me to kiss her, so there was little fear of rejection.

At one point we were flirting really heavy, and I kissed her. And we made out for awhile. Which is nice.

Then I left. and she's been texting me incessantly since, asking me when I'm coming to town next (I live about 3 hours away from my hometown, where she lives).

Any thoughts?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Layla

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Thats good, nice make out at the end. It's good that your out in the field, most people on here just read.


Originally posted by McKindley

(I'm a really fun guy, so I have a problem where girls just want to be friends, sound familiar?)

Any thoughts?
hmmm... i cant really say that i understand that. If your a fun guy, this wont stop a girl from attracting you. Maybe you mean it another way?
 

McKindley

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Layla:

To clarify: I'm a really fun guy, but I'm not a "hot" guy. So its kind of hard to gauge if a girl is attracted to me, or just generally likes being around me. I usually wait until it is painfully obvious a girl likes me before I make a move
 

medik167

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why wait to make sure its painfully obvious? most girls will give up before putting themselves out of the line like that. as far as i know, you only live once. this may just be a phrase to some but think about it. lets say you try to make a move and get rejected. thats a rejection that won't matter in the big picture and more than likely be forgotten in time. on the other hand, that one move that you made can alter your life, mainly sex life. i know when i die i don't want to be on my deathbed regretting decisions or wishing i could live my life over again. thats why its best to move through life with no regrets all the while doing things you want without regret (to a certain extent...ie obey the laws, ect.) thats just me though.....
 
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