Do you think that someone who has been in a relationship for a few years where they were treated badly (put down, never made to feel good etc) but then decided to leave, can subsequently be in a loving relationship with someone who treats them well, where she has not had any therapy....???? Thoughts guys?
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
THOUGHTS on this one....
- Thread starter George
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
bukowski_merit
Master Don Juan
how long ago was the split? women addicted to jerks have a hard time not going back to the jerk if he trys to come back into her life... and very few guys know how to handle the guy trying to come back into her life, and in return they push her back...
but to answer your question... with you saying "be in a loving relationship with someone who treats them well" - what do you mean treat her well? do as she tells? supplicate? take her out to dinner? shower her with compliments? etc??? she'll probably be very aggresive-passive with you if so... and could become a bigger headache than you can imagine...
but to answer your question... with you saying "be in a loving relationship with someone who treats them well" - what do you mean treat her well? do as she tells? supplicate? take her out to dinner? shower her with compliments? etc??? she'll probably be very aggresive-passive with you if so... and could become a bigger headache than you can imagine...
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
It depends. Remember, that just her side of the story. You didnt mention any physical abuse, so thats a good sign. You have to be more detailed about her. From what you have stated, its not too bad.
What the above posters are saying, is some women get addicted to abusive relationships, and if you dont abuse them, they dont feel loved, and will treat you like shyt. Ask her about her father, and her childhood. That will give you loads of info about her. This is really important to do. Chicks with really bad upbringing, can rarely if ever function in a healthy relationship. If she has a Leave it to ****** childhood, she may well be a keeper.
What the above posters are saying, is some women get addicted to abusive relationships, and if you dont abuse them, they dont feel loved, and will treat you like shyt. Ask her about her father, and her childhood. That will give you loads of info about her. This is really important to do. Chicks with really bad upbringing, can rarely if ever function in a healthy relationship. If she has a Leave it to ****** childhood, she may well be a keeper.
WC2
Master Don Juan
What kind of relationship are we talking here?
Do we mean some dude who's hitting her or just some dude who isn't being her little servant and put her in her place?
If it's the latter (which it usually always is), then no, she doesn't want a loving relationship.
The simple fact of the matter is that she's addicted to being treated badly. Maybe not badly, but she likes being put in her place. Consciously, she denies it. However, why would she stay with someone like this for so long?
Deep down subconsciously she actually thrives off this type of relationship. She is so attracted to the whole being dominated part of the relationship, that she doesn't know how she can trust a man who she can dominate.
I always remember my best friend from back home (the only one of my friends who I can hands down say has out of this world game). He had this girl named Gina.
Gina was beautiful, grew up with wealthy parents, and is now in law school. However, Gina didn't like 'loving' relationships. Sure, my friend would take her out from time to time, however she much better like to have sex and do what he wanted to do all the time.
I'll never forgot what he always use to say to her that blew my mind.
Whenever she would make a smart comment, he'd turn to her and say,
"Listen babe, you know you can't be makin' smart comments like that. You know I'm just going to f*ck that little mouth harder later tonight."
He would say things like this to her in front of her friends.
And that's the softcore version.
She didn't mind it.
And this isn't your town hoe; this is a successful woman who goes to law school @ an ivy league school.
Plenty of women like being treated like this. Once they learn it, it's like a drug. Nice guys drop in to the category of friend ever so easily.
Do we mean some dude who's hitting her or just some dude who isn't being her little servant and put her in her place?
If it's the latter (which it usually always is), then no, she doesn't want a loving relationship.
The simple fact of the matter is that she's addicted to being treated badly. Maybe not badly, but she likes being put in her place. Consciously, she denies it. However, why would she stay with someone like this for so long?
Deep down subconsciously she actually thrives off this type of relationship. She is so attracted to the whole being dominated part of the relationship, that she doesn't know how she can trust a man who she can dominate.
I always remember my best friend from back home (the only one of my friends who I can hands down say has out of this world game). He had this girl named Gina.
Gina was beautiful, grew up with wealthy parents, and is now in law school. However, Gina didn't like 'loving' relationships. Sure, my friend would take her out from time to time, however she much better like to have sex and do what he wanted to do all the time.
I'll never forgot what he always use to say to her that blew my mind.
Whenever she would make a smart comment, he'd turn to her and say,
"Listen babe, you know you can't be makin' smart comments like that. You know I'm just going to f*ck that little mouth harder later tonight."
He would say things like this to her in front of her friends.
And that's the softcore version.
She didn't mind it.
And this isn't your town hoe; this is a successful woman who goes to law school @ an ivy league school.
Plenty of women like being treated like this. Once they learn it, it's like a drug. Nice guys drop in to the category of friend ever so easily.