"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Those of you over 30: If you were 25 again, what would you change?

hadoken

Don Juan
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doing it over

I have a slightly different opinion here. Everyone probably wishes they dated more, made better investments (eg real estate), was less foolish about money etc. The truth is, did I really have the capacity at that age to do all these things? For me, the answer is no. So the things I would re-do would be modest..incremental improvements that would have been realistic. Even though I am single and 33, I have no major regrets so my do overs are modest. They are:

1) Go out and make more friends, but the key is find a friend who is a PLAYER. He'll force you out of your comfort zone and slowly you'll get better at this girl thing even if you don't have many natural talents.

2) Travel more. Go to places like Asia or South America where women are plentiful and an average guy can feel like a stud.

3) If you are going back to school, get the process down earlier rather than later. 2-4 year out is the ideal time b4 going back FT for say a masters.

4) Spend time with grandparents and parents if you can. Life may take you far away from them and before you know it, every visit home may be the last before you see them pass on.

5) Find friends who like to go clubbing and go once in a while even if you suck at dancing. this is a young person's place and you don't want to be 30 and visiting these places unless you live in LA or NYC.

6) Join those young professional groups and go to mixer or two. Again, not for picking up chicks per se but improving your conversation game.

And finally, spend within your means. Nothing is more pathetic than a guy driving a new BMW and living at home with mom and dad. You just want a car that doesn't scream cheap or a loser.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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milesman

Senior Don Juan
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Jun 12, 2000
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Great thread and definitely a wake up call! I'm 25 now and while I feel proud of my educational and career/self-improvement paths, I know I'm missing out on some great women because I'm SO damn serious. Thanks fellas.
 
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