Those confident in their abilities... please take a look at this

TonyTheTigerOI

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I am 17, I finished High School early and I attend a NYS University. I am good looking (9.2) and I am a very successful Don Juan (5 years). I have never been on a 3rd date. I would see girls once or twice, get as far as I wanted (usually head, not sex) and then move on.

She will be 18 in two weeks. She is nearly as precocious as I, having dated 3 guys in her life, all at least 2 years older (the most recent was 7 years older). She is cute (8.7) and sweet... the nicest, most caring girl I have ever met. She is very religious and I am not, but other than that we were raised on many of the same values.

We were freshmen at the same high school, three and a half years ago. I met her during the last few weeks of school and we were obviously crushing on each other... but as I was just beginning to mature physically, intellectually, and socially (implementing DJ principals) I did not JUMP on the opportunity. She offered her phone number one day, but before we could get together she picked up and moved a thousand miles away (literally) when her step-dad was offered a new job.

In a local coffee shop four months ago I saw her – I pushed a slutty 8.2 off my lap clean onto the floor and jogged across the length of the shop to see her. She looked like shyt (8.0 MAYBE)... a few pimples, her hair looked ratty, and she was dressed poorly.

None the less, she had my attention – something deep inside was pulling me towards her. In front of her 24 year old boyfriend, on his birthday, she gave me her new phone number.

A month later I called. We hung out a few times and she cleaned up (averaging an 8.5). But the more time I spent with her, the more time I WANTED to spend with her. She was the nicest, most polite, sweetest, most caring girl I had EVER met. And what made it so beautifully pure... she was a wonderful person not because of insecurity, but because of confidence! We grew into great friends over the next month. One night, I called, sighing about a sour date with a very beautiful girl. Chelsea had been complaining about her boyfriend a lot, I interrupted her – “Honey, maybe we are just cursed to fall for the wrong people?” She agreed.

One night, while she was driving me back to her house from Starbucks a rabbit ran in front or her car. She slammed on the breaks and we slid 5 feet off the snow-covered road... we were literally one inch from the make-shift guard rail overlooking a 400 ft gorge. I wasn’t wearing my seatbelt – my head had hit the windshield pretty hard. She climbed halfway over the center consul to see if I was ok.

Now, I have been in my fair share of nasty fights – but I can’t remember my head ever hurting that bad.

She leaned closer and pressed her hands to my forehead. “Your gonna have a nasty bump, but I think you are all right.” My headache was gone. All I could see was her –
 

TonyTheTigerOI

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her soft, nurturing hands on my forehead – her soothing voice. I was 14 years old again, I WANTED her.

She must have felt a change, because she began acting different. She is the consummate sunshine girl – she works a room like few girls can. She is outgoing and affectionate with everyone she meets. She began exercising reticence around me. She got quieter, shyer.

A week later her boyfriend dumped her. We went out to dinner. I went to kiss her, but she climbed out of my car. I got angry and yelled at her because her body language was blatantly saying that she wanted me...

“Either A, you are falling hard for me, too... but you are really, really bad at showing it or B you are just trying to hold onto an old friend, against his will. And god-damn it-“
She cut me off, “A!”

We talked for a long time, I promised to take it slow. We [barely] kissed goodbye on the side of the mouth.

For the next six weeks we really struggled. We were so nervous around each other. We barely ever had fun together. We were totally unaffectionate. When we kissed, our lips were wet and there was awesome rhythm – but it never FELT like a REAL KISS.

But the Friday before last was different. She looked the best she has (8.7). I faked like I was the confident, charismatic, charming young man I was 4 months earlier. Instead of sitting 6 feet away from her on her couch, I sat 6 inches from her. She took off her sweater revealing a napkin of a black shirt... her toned abbs and arms, her soft tan skin...

How long does it take to check a girl out? 3 seconds? A second down, a second up, a second to pause at her tits or ass. I hadn’t looked at Chelsea like that in 3 years.

I made up for it... I took 30 seconds to just look at the woman sitting next to me. I took 30 seconds to just let her know I WANT her. And finally, she relaxed... I took her hand and pulled her close... we cuddled (my first time doing this)

When we kissed goodbye she pressed her ringed-tongue against my still closed, dry lips. No rhythm. Kind of painful, my skin was so dry. It was UNBELIEVABLE – it FELT like 3 years of energy and feeling passed through our lips.

And since then she has been really evasive. I got in touch with her once, she said her friends loved me and wanted to hang out again... and they wanted to know if I had friends. She said she would call me back, but didnt. This was last Thursday. Usually she calls every 2-3 days without me calling... and ALWAYS returns my calls in 3 hours MAX.
 

TonyTheTigerOI

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Different friends have reached different conclusions – most think she has started seeing someone else. Some think she is just scared. Others think that she was just using me to rebound off her old boyfriend. What do YOU think? And what can I do about it?

I have called once on Friday, once Saturday, once Monday to no avail (I have not left any messages). She did call on Saturday morning, but didn’t leave a message (very unusual).

This Friday there is a bible study that her and I have attended the last 3 sessions in a row... if she doesn’t answer her phone this may be a way to get some air-time.

I was scared of this girl and being in a relationship. That fear is gone, I have no problem confidently, charismatically, charmingly doing ANYTHING that will allow me to set things right. Thank you so much for your input, I am terribly sorry for the length of this post.
 

xomel

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Hello there, Lorenzo. I hope my advice will come to service you. I am confident in my abilities.

Are you sure you're attracted to eachothers personalities as well as looks. From the sounds of things, you two had a history of attraction. Let's not forget the rules of attraction. Once you're attracted to someone, you're always attracted to that person. This situation all seems weird to me but I can take a shot at it. Its my gander but you can take it for what its worth.

The only thing I can come to is that your relationship with this girl was based upon dreams of the passed and attraction. Your personalities didn't click. Physical attraction and emotional attraction are two different things. Honestly, if you didnt like her so bad you would have dumped her instantaneously, correct? Hell, if a girl doesn't show me that she loves me, I'd cut her off. I sure as heck know that If I didnt get a kiss for the first date AND didnt get to make out by the third I would never date her again. She probably has some insecurity issues reguarding you. Most charismatic, affectionate girls are secure with themselves.

Id also wait til you see her again before you can come to a clean clear judgement.

Good luck,
xomel
 

ohiofutballa

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I am also confident in my abilities.

Tony you had said that you always keep it to a minimum of 2 dates, and that you date very frequently. You had a plan, 3 dates max, and then im out.

Then you meet this pretty sweet girl again, the rules dont matter anymore, shes not just some girl you met at a club. Shes different. I know she feels the same way about you. She gave you her number right infront of her bf on his birthday, if that doesnt spell interest i dont know what does. She feels that you are special, and you think that of her.

You both want each other but dont know how to make it work. The reason that it was so awkward before, was because you both did not know how to treat each other. You have never been in a situation like this. Tigers dont live in forests, but give him enough time and he will survive.

I think that all of this is over-analyzation. She likes you, she just doesnt know how to act. I would stop thinking about why she didnt call you, that will only hurt you.

Ohiofutballa
 

LikRetsam

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Your story is quite charming. Now this is something worth reading and replying to!

I like this bouncing around. Hot, then cold. Screwed up then perfectly fine.

Awesome chick... naturally falling for her. Her naturally falling hard for you... What's wrong? What isn't letting things click?!

You don't want things to click. Look at you. A story so amazing that You came here to post about it! You're not ready to let go of this adventure. It's the journey, not the destination. What can I say? Enjoy ;)
 

Nocturnal

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Originally posted by TonyTheTigerOI
I went to kiss her, but she climbed out of my car.

...

“Either A, you are falling hard for me, too

...

She cut me off, “A!”

Originally posted by TonyTheTigerOI
When we kissed goodbye
...

It was UNBELIEVABLE – it FELT like 3 years of energy and feeling passed through our lips.

And since then she has been really evasive.
Seems almost like a pattern to me. She seems kind of scared to go through with it.

You mentioned bible study. Is she very religious? She might have thoughts flashing in her mind that she needs to restrain herself.

Another possibility is that her boyfriend is trying to get her back and she hasn't revealed anything about it yet.

However, plain and simple, there's not much you can do about it without contact from her, and it's obviously too soon to forget about it completely. It also seems like you're not thinking 100% clearly, so if I were you I'd just try to relax for now and see what happens in the near future -- without worrying about it too much.
 

Jay-X

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r u really able to recognize a 8.2 from a 8.7?! and a 8.0 from a 8.2?! man u r a genius, but still i don't get why a 8 is ugly to u, while a 8.7 is beautiful:-D
 

TonyTheTigerOI

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Xomel - I hope that she is insecure with herself when she is next to me... and that is the root of her evasiveness

Ohio - I really needed to hear that, thank you

Lik - This is a DEFINATE possibility. Julian and I used to talk about this a lot. Deep inside we all are fully aware of ourselves. I have an unusual connection with my subconsious, partially due to my study of seduction/women/people/myself.

This is both good and bad. Good in that I can easily sacrifice things like candy and watching TV so that I am constantly improving and growing into my potential self. Bad in that when I want to eat candy or watch TV I feel very guilty - and I have no control over this guilt.

So what, its just candy? Well, [real] relationships are funny, in that they moderate your mood. When you are feeling really down, your girl will bring you back to a healthy mood. But, when you are feeling really good, your girl will bring you back down to a normal mood. Basically, they distribute your emotions between two people, lessoning their impact.

Because I am constantly improving, I am opperating at a very high, efficient level, and I feel GUILTY settling down with one girl. And so, my mind plays tricks on me... subconviously I work against myself and try to ruin my own relationship. Julian can back me up on this one. Sadly enough... this is what tore his nearly perfect relationship apart.

So you are definatly right. I was scared of her... nervous around her, frightented to kiss her... because I was working against myself the whole time. But I am not afraid any more... and I am looking to set this right.

Nocturnal - As I said to Xomel, I hope this is correct. She is NOT a virgin by any means, however. Shes had far more sex than me, in fact. She has, however, told me she is scared that I will see her the same as her X boyfriend (he called her a host of nasty things, refering to her sexual energy).

Jay - A 5.0 is average. There is one 10.0 on earth. And one 0.0. A 9.7 can make a living modeling. A 9.8 makes a good living modeling in recognizable adds (claiborne, ect). A 9.9 is a supermodel. I date 8.9-9.2s. I have dated a few in the 9.4-6 range. An 8.0 is just nowhere near as attractive as my usual date. An 8.2 is a little cleaner looking, but still nothing to take a second look at. An 8.7 is what most guys would consider "hot" and it is a very clean, attractive presentation. When you meet as many girls as I do youll find ways to illustrate how they look as effectively as possible. This is the system I have found.

So what would you guys do, from here? I am debating calling her again tonight and/or showing up uninvited on Friday.

Oh yeah, one last thing. BUMP!
 
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Smooth as Anything

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Look at yourself! You're a Don ****ing Juan.

Look around you! No one else is a ****ing Don Juan!

Case closed. It's been solved. Who's going to replace you, my man? I mean, unless, of course, it's me... but it's not me... ;)

You've got your **** together. Don't sweat it. Thinking about it is going to do nothing.

Act! Act! Act!

Act now! Time is limited.
 

Serg897

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Tony, buddy, Im sorry I didnt get this reply to you sooner.

Ive followed your situation with you and seen you go through various ups and downs here. Just like LikRetsam said...there is a lot of bouncing around.

Im not sure what the most likely scenario regarding what exactly is up with Chelsea is, but I will say to you again what Ive said before....do not hesitate to get rid of her if she causes you too much trouble now, despite all the progress that has been made. I see this girl causing you a lot of stress, and that is not a good thing.

Dont just next her though, and see if you can find out exactly whats up. Just my two cents.
 

Luscious

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Nocturnal's comments are spot on, exactly what I would be saying right about now.
 

Sammo

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Your story is exciting, I have faith that it will work out for you in the end.

One thing, don't forget who you are. ;)
 

The Antichrist_Star

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Damn it Anthony, shooting yourself in the foot just like we always talked about eh? No worries man... I did the exact same thing. Anthony, I want you to listen and listen good:

You have this girl Anthony, you know it, I know it, and every single person that has replied knows it. The only person who seems not to know you it... is you. So she is playing a little hard to get, so she may be getting a little cold feet, so she is giving you the run around. None of this matters Anthony... the very things that Chelsea is doing to you Anthony this girl is doing to me... and she just admitted that she was in love with me yesterday.

So, be the sexy mother****er that we both know you are Anthony, and get this girl. How you ask? Do what I did... laugh it all off, and let her know with the sexiest smile that you have that she can do whatever she has to do to pretend that she is not head over for you... and then let her know that you know. ;)

Good luck bro...

Reload...
 

TonyTheTigerOI

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Well... to keep ya'all updated... I gave her a call at 9:30 tonight. No answer, again.

Thanks for the faith guys! I was telling Julian that I recently adopted some relaxed confidence regarding the whole situation. Seeing things a little clearer... I have been tossing some possibilities around in my head. I KNOW I can make this right... Ive just got to first, talk to her in person and second, smash through some barriers. I do not normally see her anywhere, she lives pretty far away from me so I was thinking of showing up at bible study on friday to confront her. Id pardon the interruption and then...

This is where I have a few options:
-Do I begin the discussion infront of everyone... or do I take her to the hallwa (within earshot of those inside)... or do I take her outside?
-Do I just stand there, making eyecontact, untill she says something... or do I ask questions first... or do I tell her how I am feeling and evoke a response?
-Do I play agressive, try to get her angry, then make a quick transition to a wild kiss... or do I play neutral, explain the reticence I have exercised throught our relationship, then make a slow transition to a mutual expression of emotion and kiss... or do I play it sappy, tell her the "perfect love story" and get her to take her own barriers down?

Hell... I could show up and act like nothing happened... confident charismatic, and charming. Invite her out for a cup of tea and a bite to eat. If she declines just be smooth and let her know shed have more fun with me, and then go enjoy myself with some other girl.

What would you do?
 
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Nex

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Originally posted by TonyTheTigerOI

Hell... I could show up and act like nothing happened... confident charismatic, and charming. Invite her out for a cup of tea and a bite to eat. If she declines just be smooth and let her know shed have more fun with me, and then go enjoy myself with some other girl.
Perfect. That's what I'd do. ;)
 

LikRetsam

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Hey, analyzing is done. It's time to go out and have *fun*. Wasn't that why this whole thing started? FUN!?

Live alittle, you won't find a right way.
 

chill

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I can see only one problem: your questioning yourself. Im guessing your very expirienced, and that you never question yourself, but now that you have found a girl you realy like your getting nervous. So, you begin questioning yourself, and slowly your nervousness over powers your confidence.for the first time in years, your are nervous, and that knocks you clear off your feet. But now your getting back up and regaining your skills. Trust me, she will never meet another man of your ability and stature, You got this sh*t in the bag, GO FOR IT!

I also think she is just afraid of comitment.
 

TonyTheTigerOI

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TonyTheTigerOI: wow
Serg465: tell me everything
TonyTheTigerOI: serg I feel so empty
TonyTheTigerOI: just... debackled
TonyTheTigerOI: I show up at bible study
TonyTheTigerOI: and I look GOOD
TonyTheTigerOI: this is the best, arguably, that I have EVER looked
TonyTheTigerOI: grey slacks
TonyTheTigerOI: dark red dress shirt with deep tan pinstripes
TonyTheTigerOI: completely clear complexion [which is a total rarity]
TonyTheTigerOI: my hair looks GREAT
TonyTheTigerOI: i mean... I didnt even do much
Serg465: k
TonyTheTigerOI: I just put some gel in, shook my head... went to "touch it up" with my fingers... and couldnt, it just looked too good
Serg465: then?
TonyTheTigerOI: today... I am a 9.4
TonyTheTigerOI: easily the best looking guy around
TonyTheTigerOI: well...
TonyTheTigerOI: I walk into bible study
TonyTheTigerOI: which is a 20 min drive at 80 mph from my house
TonyTheTigerOI: Im about 10 min late
TonyTheTigerOI: she isnt there
TonyTheTigerOI: I pardon the interruption, ask if anyone has seen her, explain that she is very punctual and Im a lil worried
TonyTheTigerOI: no one has talked to her since Sunday morning... so Im very worried
TonyTheTigerOI: especially cuz Dawnette, the discussion leader's fiancé, had talked to her last, and she said she was coming tonight, to bible study
TonyTheTigerOI: but, they invite me to pull up a chair
TonyTheTigerOI: and I do... we talk for about 45 min about bibley stuff
TonyTheTigerOI: but its not bad... i get into the discussions
TonyTheTigerOI: it ends
TonyTheTigerOI: dawnette calls chelsea, unbenounced to me
TonyTheTigerOI: chelsea answers, dawnette asks whats up
TonyTheTigerOI: she says "oh im... a little busy with john, if you know what I mean"
TonyTheTigerOI: [or so the convo was retold to me]
Serg465: she is no longer of your concern
Serg465: I cant believe it
Serg465: honestly man
TonyTheTigerOI: and so dawnette walks over, and tells me this
Serg465: that this girl would do this to you
TonyTheTigerOI: and then the
TonyTheTigerOI: leader of the discussion says "oh Im sorry, Anthony"
TonyTheTigerOI: "well... at least I dont have to worry anymore... and Im not sure who john is, but dawnettes tone would lead me to believe It was a mistake coming here, tonight"
Serg465: this makes me sick
TonyTheTigerOI: and he said "well john used to be a friend of mine... he is what the bible defines as a 'fool'"
TonyTheTigerOI: "a fool?"
TonyTheTigerOI: "I-Im sorry Anthony"
TonyTheTigerOI: everyone was having their own side discussions at this point, as the session had ended
TonyTheTigerOI: I just, got all their attention
TonyTheTigerOI: and I said
TonyTheTigerOI: "Hey everyone, I just want to sincerely thank you for being so open and friendly to me - even though I didnt share your beliefs" They all nodded "sure, no problem" and I continued, "I hope that there is a heaven, because you guys deserve it - I have never felt so welcomed by strangers, or so thought of by new friends"
TonyTheTigerOI: I shook the leader of the discussions hand and thanked him, wished him a wonderful married life
TonyTheTigerOI: wished one kid, eric, good luck in forming a youth group at his particular place of worship
TonyTheTigerOI: wished another kid, whom I dont know his name, good luck finding a job and a car
TonyTheTigerOI: another 2 kids good luck with their computer business
TonyTheTigerOI: and I left
TonyTheTigerOI: and I yelled at the top of my lungs for 10 minutes straight
TonyTheTigerOI: and I drove home at 105 mph, my cars top speed
 

TonyTheTigerOI

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Serg465: .......
TonyTheTigerOI: serg
Serg465: well im in shock
Serg465: this turned out to be the worst case scenario
TonyTheTigerOI: this was the girl who cleaned my glasses with Windex and Kleenex
TonyTheTigerOI: the one who when we met at a review class late freshmen year... saved me a Popsicle because I showed up late
TonyTheTigerOI: the one who would call me 30 min after we said goodbye if I didnt call her... just to know I was home safe
Serg465: unbelievable
TonyTheTigerOI: the girl I spent an hour on the phone battling her religious intolerance... only for her to tell me I was "so many wonderful things..." and that all I believed, tho so different from what she believed, "Baby it IS enough"
TonyTheTigerOI: the girl the girl who looked at me last Friday like she WANTED me
TonyTheTigerOI: and kissed me like she MEANT IT
Serg465: this coming from a religious girl just shocks me even more
Serg465: even though I dont think it should...religious people can be the most hypocritical people alive
TonyTheTigerOI: the girl who made me realize I do, in some tiny place in my heart, believe there is some presence that I cannot taste or touch or smell... something I can place y faith in – “god” if you will
TonyTheTigerOI: and it makes me SICK to think that she wanted to include me in a religion where people like HER find solace
TonyTheTigerOI: Im going to burn in hell - if there is such a place
TonyTheTigerOI: but Im walking there with my pride
Serg465: hehe
TonyTheTigerOI: I hope she thinks of me when they drag her, kicking and screaming, with her hypocrisy
Serg465: just think - all the cool people are in hell
TonyTheTigerOI: dont make jokes
TonyTheTigerOI: Im so far from humor
Serg465: okay
Serg465: Ive never had any instance like this happen in my life
Serg465: someone cheating on me so boldly
TonyTheTigerOI: she ASKED ME
TonyTheTigerOI: if I would ever cheat
Serg465: I can only imagine how pissed off you must feel
TonyTheTigerOI: and I said "I would never begin a relationship with someone I could not remain faithful"
Serg465: so more hypocrisy
TonyTheTigerOI: and she said... redundantly over 10 minutes... that she could not live with herself if she cheated, because of her religious beliefs
TonyTheTigerOI: serg
TonyTheTigerOI: I could kill someone tonight
TonyTheTigerOI: with my bare hands
TonyTheTigerOI: I am so angry
TonyTheTigerOI: I am one of the sexiest, most successful 17 year olds in the COUNTRY
Serg465: lol
TonyTheTigerOI: I sent my applications in not 3 weeks ago and I already have 2 acceptance letters to 2 honors programs with FULL RIDES
TonyTheTigerOI: I play on the STATE SOCCER TEAM... the 3rd best state in the country
TonyTheTigerOI: I may not have had a lot of sex... but Ive ****ed hot WOMEN, not girls...
TonyTheTigerOI: and Ive been USED by a fickle 17 year old high schooler whos looks dont warrant a 3rd date
TonyTheTigerOI: I have NEVER been this angry in my entire
TonyTheTigerOI: WHY?
Serg465: ......
Serg465: Im not sure what to say
TonyTheTigerOI: there is nothing to say
TonyTheTigerOI: last friday was so wonderful...
TonyTheTigerOI: when I woke up Saturday I wasnt afraid of her anymore... I was finally ready to be the confident, charismatic, charming man she had asked out so many times...
TonyTheTigerOI: and now - she doesnt deserve me
Serg465: no she doesnt
 
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