You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
true dat some guys here have real wisdom.☜╬☞ said:
that can true. You should becareful though about the mods. I'm poor and black and I've been relaxing my speech lately. I won't lose my intergrity to anybody though.BigJimbo said:
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Chosen1 said:
Finally, out of all the inane ramblings that you have posted....I agree with something you said! Very true about all these suburban white kids and asians as well trying to emulate ghetto black guys. Have never understood it!BigJimbo said:
Why am I a troll, I'm just stating how I feel. If I would have listened to you guys earlier in life I would be way better off. Examples are what's been happening to me in my life lately and the advice you guys give.It is really golden and I appreciate those who give honest advice even you mantis.Mantis Toboggan said:
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
BigJimbo is the troll. Good lord, buddy.Chosen1 said:
Apologies Mantis, I agree 100% pachuco. This site really works if you're willilng to follow the advice given. You should only use any site like this for so long then explore on your own just like you say.HeyPachuco! said:
There was a passage in the book of pook( that thing was funny as hell) where it talks about guys going back and forth to a manual for advice, when the key is to take your knowledge and apply it to real life, otherwise what was the point in learning if your never willing to do anything on your own.HeyPachuco! said:
