Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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This one's going in the bible for sure :)

T Money

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Keep a bottle of hot sauce every place you have sex (Bathroom, bedroom etc.) After you use the condom, put a few drops into the used condom and throw it away. This results in the "Burning of the cooch" if the ***** tries to actually use the contents.

This is a DAMN good idea, because I had an ex gf who sais she was allergic to latex, so stupid me didn't use a condom. She said she was on the pill (who knows, maybe she wasn't) then every time she wanted me to *** inside her so I did. Then when we were done she would go into the bathroom for a minute and "clean up" she said. Who knows, maybe she was rubbing it in trying for me to get her pregnant so she can get child support payments. Crazy b!tches.

This came from Leykis 101. I'm sure some of you have heard of Tom Leykis, he's a radio personality on FreeFM who teaches men how to get the most tail for the least amount of money. His stuff has never worked for me but other guys out there seem to love his work.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Keeper

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LoL. "Would you like some hot sauce with that, sir?" Is what you'll be hearing from now on whenever you buy condoms at the store. :-D

This isn't serious enough to go into the bible.
 

Soprano

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i believe that our poor little sperms die as soon as they leave our **** and dont have a warm **** to go in
 

Skel

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Good idea though or just flush it down the toilet
 

flippinfreak

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Man, this is old

Leykis stole it from an old 60's movie...
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Bible_Belt

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There's a recent court case where a doctor was gettings BJs from one of his office workers. She was saving the evidence of these encounters by I think spitting in an ice cube tray and freezing the sperm. (I am trying to find verification of the freezing part, but can't) Then she made a hobby out of incubating the jizz cubes until one of them took, and she sued the doctor in a paternity suit (and won). The doctor countersued for theft of his sperm, but the court ruled against him. The court said that the BJ and the jizz met all three elements of a gift: offer, acceptance, and donative intent.

http://archives.tcm.ie/irishexaminer/2005/02/26/story52130863.asp

Apparently, it is no big deal to freeze sperm for later use:
http://www.infertilitydoctor.com/lab/lab_freeze.htm
Sperm can be frozen on demand and tolerate freezing more readily than embryos.

Freezing is a very traumatic procedure for an embryo and not all embryos survive. It is normal for one or more of the cells in the embryo to die as a result of the freezing and thawing procedure. However, provided that the majority of the cells in an embryo survive, the embryo still has a chance to establish a pregnancy.
 

Cruise

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An idea mentioned on DYD Advanced Dating Techniques...


although...



tried and true :nervous:
 

flippinfreak

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lol, Bible Belt

Seriously, I just talked to my mates here at work, and they just laughed.

Mens rea, there was no intention of her creating a child with the sperm... I'm not too sure about the "donation intent" though... that sounds corny:p

Tomorrow I have to ask these two paramedic dudes... damn, I gotta ask their girls

DHV(doctor getting tooled), storytelling, and opinion opener...
 

T Money

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blueangel83 said:
"This is pathetic."
Consider yourself lucky that you don't think like other women. I'm not saying they ALL think like this, but some of them do. Like my ex gf in that little story I told.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Potbelly

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This is Bible for sure. :up:
 

T Money

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I hope you guys understood that was a joke, I KNOW this isn't going in the bible, it was sarcasm.
 
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