This is F-d up!!!!!!!!!

[zerocelcius]

MOST OF OUR INSICURITIES ARE INTERNAL. May be that her fear was a projection. Which is a red flag. When people do things like that they are really saying "Hey don't trust me cause I have a problem, that I am going to project on you, so I can find your weekness and feel better about mine."

You are going to take a big step here and it is normal to be nervous, but she just told you she has an issue with faithfulless.

Projecting her weekness on you.

I would be seriously set aside by this and shaken by her projection.

 

[Luveno]

jprjrjr,

That experience sounds like it really hurt you, and rightfully so. Your good word was not taken as gold by your very own fiance. What to do, what to do?

Many replied saying that those with the fears are those who are themselves guilty - projection, they call it. This is a very plausable theory.

What I'm about to tell you to do is underhanded, but it is a very effective way of deciphering whether or not YOU can actually trust your fiance.

Get a keylogger for your computer and discover the password for her email account. Periodically sign in and see what kind of messages she has been sending/receiving. You would be surprised at how many lying women are caught red-handed by this method.

Fickle women can't keep their mouth shut about their prospects and insecurities, and that includes email as well.

 

[frivolousz21]

well I can see why she would think that..ur 6 5 and huge...prolly alot of women want you.

but regardless there is no reason for it..ur in the US military isnt that enuf for her to know you stand for integridy and loyalty.

Id have it out with her if I were you..but if you love and she loves you...work threw it.

 

[jprjrjr]

Thanks for the advice guys. This really did hurt me. She's been ringing my phone off the hook, but I just can't bring myself to talk to her right now.

Not only did she not trust me, she punked me infront of my boys. They all said it was bullshyt what she did, but I can't help feeling like they're laughing at me behind my back.

I can understand having cold feet, but I never did anything to make her not trust me...

I really have to take some time to evaluate this....I feel like someone kicked me in the gut.

 

[italostud]

I knew after the first couple of sentances what was going on. One thing you have to learn is to trust your gut. You knew something was weird about it. I've had a girlfriend do this to me before and it really sucks. Because for a second, you're thinking "man, this is the easiest puzzy i've ever gotten! haha", then when you find out what's really going on, you get pissed.

Just to let you know, what your gf did was way out of line, and I'd seriously reconsider your engagement to her.

 

[jprjrjr]

Originally posted by italostud
I knew after the first couple of sentances what was going on. One thing you have to learn is to trust your gut. You knew something was weird about it. I've had a girlfriend do this to me before and it really sucks. Because for a second, you're thinking "man, this is the easiest puzzy i've ever gotten! haha", then when you find out what's really going on, you get pissed.

Just to let you know, what your gf did was way out of line, and I'd seriously reconsider your engagement to her.

You know, that's exactly it. It felt weird because cute chicks like her generally aren't that aggressive. I mean I've had women come on to me before, but something about the way she was doing it felt fake.

I guess the old saying "If it seems too good to be true, it probably is" holds.

P.S. Now she has the brunette calling my cell telling me it was more her idea, and I shouldn't be mad at my fiance

 

[DJDamage]

That was a rotten thing to do. For her to question your loyalty by trying to trick you has actually caused her loyalty for you to suffer.

Your woman sounds insecure immature and manipulative to pull this off. If she saw this as a harmless act shows that she is not really ready for marriage.

On the other hand people do make mistakes and her way of thinking was that you would have laughed it off because that is what most AFC's would do (since they let their women test them all the time). Her friend did reveal the plot behind it so it was not like she tested you and never revealed to you that she did.

Never the less ,you should prospone the wedding indefinatly and evalulate if you really want to marry her because without trust you got nothing.

 

[aftershock]

Ouch....

Yes, call off the engagement, but stay in the relationship for the time being.

Thing is, you're going to be constantly suspicious of her now. It'll probably break up in a couple of months.

I agree with what most of the guys have said above.

 

[BrWnSugaMan]

*Read this*

Here is the most important aspect that everyone is overlooking.

*Your fiancee has just realized that you are a great guy because you did not accept the other woman's moves and she is crying because she is afraid of losing you.

 

[italostud]

Re: *Read this*

Originally posted by BrWnSugaMan
Here is the most important aspect that everyone is overlooking.

*Your fiancee has just realized that you are a great guy because you did not accept the other woman's moves and she is crying because she is afraid of losing you.

No, the important part, like someone already said, is that she was manipulative, deceitful, and tried to entrap him. Do you think that this was a one time thing? Can you seriously believe that? This is the kind of wife that will have strange men in black sedans following him in his car.

 

[loco2chon]

:O

Oh my goodness!.... That was pretty messed up. Especially if the burnette was hot. But look at it this way. You can take control of the situation from here. It's good that you're mad because now she's the one looking bad. Especially since you didn't fall for it.
If I was you, I would take the best of the situation and get something good out of it. ;-)


-Juan

 

[Eyes_Of_Fire]

IF SHE DOESN"T TRUST YOU SHE DOESN"T TRUST HERSELF!!!!

What happens when you are away and some sexy DJ rolls up and seduces her, what would she do? Well you can tell from her actions already so you have to decide what you are going to do from there.

Eyes_Of_Fire

 

[jprjrjr]

Originally posted by Eyes_Of_Fire
IF SHE DOESN"T TRUST YOU SHE DOESN"T TRUST HERSELF!!!!

What happens when you are away and some sexy DJ rolls up and seduces her, what would she do? Well you can tell from her actions already so you have to decide what you are going to do from there.

Eyes_Of_Fire

I never thought of it that way...interesting

 

[MixMaxster]

actually that guy does have a good point, but i wanted to say man that i'm happy to hear that you took it the way you did. Because seriously I think what she did was totally disrespectful of you and she felt she had something to prove or something?

Man I hope you don't hold on to it forever, but really I have this new thing now adays where I tell someone no when they say they're sorry. It's harsh I know, but really i feel people get off too easy by thinking sorry is enough. I'm an understanding and accepting guy, but they need to know that they can't get away with that behaviour and they need to engrain it into their heads that it won't happen again.

It honestly may sound like it's rough or being too hard on them, but I think it does the job.