"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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this guy was touching a girl on my couch when she was past out.

MattS

Don Juan
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this girl and her friend were over my house last night and we all got drunk. i actually like the girl that this post is about. this guy was over who knows me and all my roomates, he was actually best friends with my roomate before but he just kept on getting to drunk and doin stupid sh1t so they stopped hanging out bascially.

we get drunk and the girl passes out on the couch. i pass out there along with her friend. the guy is sitting on the couch and drunk. i open my eyes and he has this crazy look on his face (he didnt know i was awake). he starts rubbing the girls azz and legs with this insane look on his face. it was the weirdest sh1t. he does it for like a minute. if i said something he probalby wouldve flip out on me and start sh1t with me. hes a big dude 6 2" about 220. if sh1t got really bad i would have no choice but to say something and face an altercation. anyways my roomate comes up stairs cause his gf told him to bring the girls down stairs. apparently she knew something was going to happen and so some crazy look on his face and was worried. when he came up the dude acted like he was sleeping. he took the girls downstairs and they went to sleep.

my roomate called me this morning and asked what happened blah blah blah. i told him and he said he talked to the girls friend first and mentioned something...i dont know if he straight up said the dude was touching your friend who was past out. when i was on the phone with him the girl called my roomate and i dont think he told her exactly what happened...i think he just said dude was being creepy etc but no details.

i texted her in the afternoon and said hey roomate told me xxxx was being shady/weird with you last night. just wanna make sure u r ok. 2 hours later she texts back and says yea im fine thank you. the fvcked up thing is that i dont think she realizes what exactly happened. i see this girl a lot her and her freind are always hanging out. i might see her tomorrow but i dont know if i should even say anything like did you know that dude was rubbing you when you were past out. shell probalby ask why i didnt do anything and i guess i could say i woke up for a second and saw it then my roomate came up right after. besides the point i just dont know if i should say anything or just wait to see if she asks me. yes i know hes not coming over anymore
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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DonutMan

Don Juan
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( . )( . ) said:
Calm down Francis, some weirdo touches a chick while she sleeps?

Not the first time its happened and wont be the last. No need to turn it into an episode of Gilmore girls.

Unnecessary drama is not a skill you should be practicing. Like your big weirdo mate Lenny did "put it to bed" :p

LOL.......HAHAHAHAHA
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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DJVladdy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2007
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Matt, I wanna say:

chillax, bro - just chillax mah man. She'll survive, trust me
 
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