"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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this girl at work

M

MP5583

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I work with this girl, she's cute, but really shy. I kinda like her a little, and I would ask her out if I was positive she's feelin me, cuz i dont wanna look like a jerk and then have to work with her and have it be awkward.

She sent me a text a few weeks ago saying how we could have "maybe" hung out if I wasnt working. But I was already supposed to work, and she knew that. If she really wanted to hang out, wouldnt she text when I wasnt working?? LOL, just makes more sense that way...

But when I talk to her, I notice that when I'm facing her in my chair, and shes sitting in her chair, she never completely turns her chair around to face me too, shes always kinda perpendicular to me, lol. U would think most people face the person when ur having a conversation, lol. Also shes always fiddling with things, like her keys mostly. Thats a good sign right, means she nervous talking to me, and that maybe she's interested? She blushes sometimes too when we talk.

This girl is really shy and even if she was interested i dont think she would really give me any "hints" or anything that would help me gauge her IL. I try to show her im interested by holding doors open for her, doing little favors, eye contact, talking to her alot, but its hard cuz i dont wanna be too obvious in case she doesnt like me.

Any ideas on what I should do? Also, any ideas what shy girls do when they are interested? anything i should be looking for?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Z

Zombie

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This text she sent you - was this in response to one of yours, or was it out of the blue?
 
R

reyalp

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don't dip your pen in the company ink
 
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MP5583

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it wasnt in response to a text, but to something i said, i said had requested to work that night, which was new years eve, because i had no plans and i didnt wanna sit home and do nothing, so i guess she remembered i said that. her text was something like "we could've maybe hung out if u didnt request to work...then u'd have something to do"...
 
Z

Zombie

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Oh sh1t. You told a girl you REQUESTED to WORK because you had no plans?? Major no-no.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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AmIAFC

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Look, man...

You hear this a lot, but you never have it explained to you why...

Do not mess with girls at work. I had to learn this lesson the hard way. I know, right now you're thinking, "I know this girl, we'll be all right...you messed up somehow but it won't happen to me bla bla bla," but TRUST me...you don't want to go this route regardless of what your head, your heart, or your second head dictates.
 
M

MP5583

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ok, how bout forgeting about the whole "dont date people u work with thing." the thing is, its not a strict work environment at all, its just a part time job, and everyone is pretty chill. i mean as long as were not all over each other in front of customers, i dont think it would be a problem....so can we forget about that part?

and whats bad about saying i had nothing to do? id rather make money while i can then sit home...
 
Z

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and whats bad about saying i had nothing to do? id rather make money while i can then sit home...
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lol, that's my point. You're telling a woman you have nothing to do on New Years and are so bored out of your mind you want to work. She was probably wondering why you weren't going out with your friends drinking, or doing something. New Years is a pretty big holiday to not be doing nothing on. You want this girl to believe you have a social life here. Get my point?
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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