i am currently 17 years old and i want more women in my life i have been reading and trying my best to improve myself but i have this fear that i am afraid what will people will say if i get rejected. i've had nightmares that i was in the subway and some girl rejected me bad and the train was packed!!! alot of people looked at me ever since that happen i have been scared straight that might happen to me in public i just cant deal with i am open to any criticism , i am open to hear honest comment s from u guys.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
This fear is ruining my chances with women
- Thread starter Joey23
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
EvilAgenda
Senior Don Juan
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- 372
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High five everyone in the train. You went for what you wanted like a man.
self-respect
Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 25, 2012
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- 59
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The key to just going for it is having absolute disregard for what other people think or say. Don't give a fck. You live your life for yourself, not the other people around you. The only person you ever have to answer to is yourself, and I'd hate knowing that I wussed out and lacked the balls to go through with what I wanted because of others much more than caring about those people staring at and judging me. Practice so that this becomes a gut reaction. As someone who used to be one of the biggest thinkers you'll come across, I have to tell you: DON'T let your brain stop you. It makes you over-think it, build it up and make it into such a big deal that you'll get way too nervous and blow any chance you had to begin with. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Things you need to approach:
1. Positive, happy mindset that shows you feel good about yourself - confident but relaxed body language, the ability to smile and laugh
2. Some observational skills to break the ice
3. Stop thinking
Talk to everyone you can, not just girls you see. It's amazing how many more people say hi first when you stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, look them in the eyes and smile. Do this as a natural reflex that you do for yourself, based on trying to become the person you want to be. Don't let others dictate what you can and can't do.
1. Positive, happy mindset that shows you feel good about yourself - confident but relaxed body language, the ability to smile and laugh
2. Some observational skills to break the ice
3. Stop thinking
Talk to everyone you can, not just girls you see. It's amazing how many more people say hi first when you stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, look them in the eyes and smile. Do this as a natural reflex that you do for yourself, based on trying to become the person you want to be. Don't let others dictate what you can and can't do.
btownbuck2012
Master Don Juan
Joey23 said:
im just gonna be straight up with you man. you can't go through life with this attitude. Life is a gamble. In fact, having a perfect life, not getting rejected, etc, wouldn't be really living.
without pain, how would you know pleasure? without sadness how would you know happiness? get my point?
The biggest thing you need to learn about dealing with women, and life in general, is that IT IS OK FOR SOME PEOPLE NOT TO LIKE YOU. THIS IS NORMAL
Please read that again if you have to. Look at great men throughout history. They all have their fair share of people who absolutely HATED them. Check out my signature below man. Nobody knows the key to happiness, it's something you've gotta figure out on your own, but the key to failure is trying to make everyone like you.
Therefore, my advice to you would be the following: approach girls. just do it. Will it be really hard at first? yes. will it suck really bad when a sexy girl blows you off in public because she thinks you're a loser? of course. But just remember, this is all normal and part of the process! Keep your head up and always try to keep things in perspective.
good luck
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
nightcrawler
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 12, 2007
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- 420
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stop trying to improve yourself young one...self improvement is masturbation.Joey23 said:
If you're in OK shape not fat etc focus on THE GIRLS..that is all...the girls. Focus on what they want, what they like, etc.
Don't fall into the trap of self improvement...if you do you'll be another one of these idiots making weekly posts about how to be an alpha male.
What do you mean? You are telling a guy to focus on what girls want or like? Who gives a crap what they like I say! I'll tell you what they like...tall handsome gentleman, a man who is comfortable in his skin, playful and whos company is just irresistable.nightcrawler said:
Isn't overcoming a fear to approach women actually an improvement in ones life? You can go into the field and fail miserably multiple times, eventually you will score, but...who the hell wants to score eventually. You need to be that guy who attracts eyes of beauthiful ladies, the top 20% percent who is laying 80% of the chicks. Every minute here on theoretical field is a waste if up mentioned thing is not the ultimate goal. You may satisfy for less, but that's up to your ambition. He needs not to be an 'alfa male', but a male for a start, and for that he has to work his way up.
Cheers.
PapiChulo
Master Don Juan
Not only that but fear ruins chances in all aspects of life for exemption of self-preservation where it keeps you in check. You simply have to learn how to overcome it. The worse thing one can do is be a coward.