"This date is going to be purely platonic, right???"

[Merlin777]

She agreed in principle to go out to dinner. (Yes, I know, rookie mistake, should have proposed a light lunch instead since it's less involved. I should not have proposed a steak house either.)

So I kept her in suspense for a while until the week of the planned "date".

Today I asked her if she likes a certain restaurant. She replies that she likes it a lot.

But then she also writes back, ""This is purely Platonic right????"

What the heck do I say?

Do I subtly put my foot down and say no?

Do I feign confusion and say what do you mean?

Do I say "sure" and just apply my DJ game there and over the course of time turn platonic into romantic?

?

 

[plate's_empty]

This is somewhat of a sh1t test.

Just go with it. "sure" is just fine. or "that's cool, I just want to get out." Then don't press for anything.

I put this in the same realm as "you can come in, but we're not having sex." Which usually means an automatic lay.

Also, make sure she pays her half And if she complains say in a serious way: "I liked your idea of us just being friends."

 

[Zarky]

She agreed in principle to go out to dinner. (Yes, I know, rookie mistake, should have proposed a light lunch instead since it's less involved. I should not have proposed a steak house either.)

Um no, you should have proposed drinks in the evening near one of your places, so you could go home and f*ck after a few drinks.

So I keep her in suspense for a while until the week of the planned "date".

I don't know what this even means.

Then she writes, ""This is purely Platonic right????"

What the heck do I say?

You say nothing and delete her number. Find a chick who doesn't dry-heave at the thought of having sex with you.

 

[nwgforlife]

sounds like a waste of time

But if you go out together after that, you must must make her pay for her own **** at the very least.

 

[VladPatton]

Option#1: Don't reply. Be sure, she KNOWS you want a date and is diffusing it ahead of time because she doesn't want you to try any moves, but wants to go have steak at the same time. I'd cancel at the last minute. Steakhouse? After that comment? Fück that, go cheap and ask her to go to a cafe. I'm willing to bet she'll say no or flake on you. This chick is lookin for a free steak dinner.


Option #2: Reply. Say, ''actually this is a 100% pure date''. And she what she says. If she wants Platonic, hit the nuke button and kill it right there. Refuse anything but a date. It'll show she's not going to steer you and get a free steak dinner. I've done this before. No hard feelings, bıtch, you wanna bang her, not be her girlfriend with a penis.

Good luck and let us know how it turns out.

 

[FairShake]

Platonic is coffee or beers dude, not steak.

Ask her if her girlfriends take her out for steak dinners after just getting to know her.

 

[TheStig]

Option#1: Don't reply. Be sure, she KNOWS you want a date and is diffusing it ahead of time because she doesn't want you to try any moves, but wants to go have steak at the same time. I'd cancel at the last minute. Steakhouse? After that comment? Fück that, go cheap and ask her to go to a cafe. I'm willing to bet she'll say no or flake on you. This chick is lookin for a free steak dinner.

Her: This is platonic right?
You: I haven't decided yet.

I like these two scenarios the most. Depending on how I felt at the time, I would do either one.

 

[MascaraSnake]

Her: This is platonic right?
You: I haven't decided yet.

:rockon:

 

[Zarky]

All the above advice is silly, because her "question" was not a question at all. It was a frame-setting device. It was a statement.

She basically said, "You're free to take me out to dinner but I'd rather saw off my own thumbs than have sex with you."

Any guy who would take a girl who said that out for anything at all is the epitome of AFC. The fact that OP is even wondering what to do shows that he's got a looong way to go.

 

[Big Nuts]

NEVER have a first date "dinner date"...lesson learned.

Quick drink with a quick escape if she's a goon.

 

[plate's_empty]

Her statement was dumb. Like a lot of statements that come out of girl's mouths. She was asking YOU. You decide. Like Dangers' response.

Guys can't get too butt hurt about what comes out of girl's mouths. Half the $hit they say shouldn't even enter into your brains or mean the slightest thing. You are the Alpha, you decide what the fvck the date is going to be.

Even if she says it's just going to be as friends. Is that what she really means? Who the fvck knows. They sure as hell don't. Besides, the time they usually decide they are going to have sex with you is DURING the date, not before.

Personally I like it when they say things like that. That way, when the date's going well and you've built up the attraction, then when they try to hold your hand. You can bust out: "I thought we were just going to be friends."

Every dumb $hit test they do is just another opportunity to throw it back on them and get their hamster spinning. Spin that $hit!!

 

[bluejay83]

Her: This is platonic right?
You: I haven't decided yet.

THIS OP

regain the control by reminding her you have the choice.

 

[Desdinova]

In other words, "I'll let you buy my food but I won't fvck you." If I had a woman tell me that, I'd wait until after we ordered our food, excuse myself to the washroom, and then fvck off out the door. There's no reason for her to say "yes" to a meal and expect it to be platonic. It's disrespectful.

 

[LorenzoVonM]

I agree with Zarky

She agreed in principle to go out to dinner. (Yes, I know, rookie mistake, should have proposed a light lunch instead since it's less involved. I should not have proposed a steak house either.) ?

What does agreeing in principle to go out to dinner even mean? Either she agrees to go or doesn't.

So I kept her in suspense for a while until the week of the planned "date".

She wasn't in suspense. It wasn't even a thought in her mind

Today I asked her if she likes a certain restaurant. She replies that she likes it a lot.

But then she also writes back, ""This is purely Platonic right????"

This is not a **** test. You are in the friend-zone. I have never ever heard this come out of a woman's mouth after asking them out. Because I don't get in the friend-zone to begin with. She doesn't see you as a sexual threat. If she did you wouldn't have heard that. She doesn't say that to men she has attraction for. Some more information about how you know this girl would probably clear things up.

What the heck do I say?

Do I subtly put my foot down and say no?

Do I feign confusion and say what do you mean?

Do I say "sure" and just apply my DJ game there and over the course of time turn platonic into romantic?

You don't say anything. You forget about her and do better with the next girl. This will be a complete waste of time.

 

[NewAndImproved]

Agreed with the above. There's a lot of strange stuff going on here:

"We agreed in principle..." I'm not sure what this means either. This isn't business it's dating.

"She was waiting in suspense" Only if you made her wet which you don't

Etc etc...

Maybe some guys on here can attest to turning around a situation like this but tbh I've never heard these words before. Hell yeah I've been friend zoned before but after that I had no expectations of doing anything with her. Seems to me to be a case of the OP not knowing when he was already cooked.

 

[Vidrio]

You say nothing and delete her number. Find a chick who doesn't dry-heave at the thought of having sex with you.

This. She's not interested. Don't waste anymore of your time on this girl.

 

[cordoncordon]

To be honest, if a girl said this to me, I would not waste my good time and money on her by taking her to a nice dinner. I'm sure you have enough friends, you don't need to go spend $100 or more on another one you barely know.

What I would do is not respond to her text, just ignore it... but tomorrow say something like this. "Hey, turns out I have (whatever reason you can give for eating dinner that night-business dinner, eating at parents, whatever) so I am going to have to take a raincheck on dinner, but why don't we meet for drinks at such and such a time?" And judge her reaction from there. If she him haws around and acts like she might not want to, then you know she just wanted a good, free dinner. If she is enthusiastic about meeting for drinks, then odds are she is open to something more than friends. And the alcohol will make that quickly apparent....or not.

Plus, if she brings up the issue of it just being platonic, then at least she is thinking about sex. How she is thinking about it? That remains to be seen.

Good luck.

 

[Wolfgang D]

Her: This is platonic right?
You: I haven't decided yet.

God yes, you have to do this one. Awesome comeback. Major props to Danger.

 

[Tomthebomb]

I try to always act from a set of principles, it makes life a lot easier. Instead of trying to always find the extract, most perfect answer you can just defer to these principles. One of them is to always tell people what I want - call it honesty. I encourage everybody to say what they want and what they mean. In this case I'd tell her no, it's not platonic at all, it's a date.

 

[BigSmooth]

I've had a girl say this to me before when I asked her out. We were clearly flirting with each other and she replies with, "this is a friendly dinner right?"

I told her "nah, I have enough friends" then gave her a knowing wink.

Fvcked her later that night.

This whole interaction was in person by the way...not digitally so who knows what your girl is implying. However, I do not think your situation is the same as mine.

Go with Danger's reply. And asking her to a steak dinner was a huge mistake.

It's ok. You'll learn.