"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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this chick

kk2004

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ok guys i gotta ask a question. Im not sure if what im thinking is right or wrong.

I have this gurl, and she talks alot of stuff, like oh i "Miss u" and "i luv u" but im always the one to suggest that we get togther and hang out. Now I know that the MAN is the one who decides the time and place. It says so in the dj bible. That the man is always in charge. So if he wants to meet the woman, he tells her and he does it.

BUT..

What if ur the ONE all the time, suggesting to get togehter.

Look at this convo (on the phone)

me: hi
her: what are u doing today
me: nothing (bad answer, cuz i do have stuff too do, but oh well ill let her know later on)
me: u?
her: im gonna go hang out with my friend nick (gay guy) at the mall
me: oh okay (me thinking, if she knows im not doing anything why didnt she ask me too come)

then we just talked about some other stuff

Now what i dont get is that she says all those things, but she doesnt follow up. So naturally we have a bull****ter. So i shouldnt believe what she says or, maybe im reading too much into it or her intrest level isnt as high as i thought it is. Its gotta be one of those three things.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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NoMoreAFC

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i think it says on the dj bible the following


" pay attention to what women do for you not to what they say "
 

kk2004

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yeah

yeah. i kno.

I rembember this saying. So i guess what ur trying to say is that she TALKS alot but she doesnt follow up. So i guess her intrest level isnt as high as i thought it is. I guess ill just act aloof to her and just let her know that i dont care by not showing any intrest.
 

NoMoreAFC

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that's right. the operative word is get more contacts of girls that really show interest in you and NEXT the *****. One more thing, real men are always Busy, don't say you are doing nuthin', or she will see u as loser and boring guy also, get lots of woman contacts, next time when one girl doesn't want to go out with you, you have more options to go with.
 

kk2004

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ic

but this gurl is my gf, and she says alot of things and during sex, she tells me

her: plz dont leave me, i love u so, so much

she realli convinced me that she did care for me and that she was attracted. Her words made it seem her intrest level is sky high.

Funny things is that she is gonna come over my house this saturday for the first time. with her moms permission. she is 17. We talked about this yesterday, so we planned out something for saturday a week in advance. But i guess she only wants to see me on weekends. She must have a weekely limit for me, signs of low intrest level.

IF her intrest level was so Sky high wounldnt she want to see me today, at the mall even for a few hours, she would at least ask and id let her know, prob no.

Her not asking me today, is it a sign of low intrest? Even after all she has said, and the fact we have planned her commin over this weekend. Im confused cuz i dont know which way she is leaning
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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NoMoreAFC

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yeah my ex last week told me that also, please don't leave i love u so so much, a few days later i was being dumped, go figure. woman are indecisive beings, what they think or say today, they will say or think different tomorrow.


when a woman loves you she has time to be you, she doesn't go and check her agenda to see if she can.

dude she's too young, she is in the process of making discoveries and she doesnt know what or who she wants in her life.

do the following cut ALL contact with her for a week or so and she how she reacts, if she misses u she will show u. dont answer her phone calls, dont call her, be busy during that week. be a CHALLENGE to her.
 

kk2004

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we speak everyday, it just hurts to realize that she never meant it. If i cut contact she will just get mad and sad and that will put the relationship even downward.

It sucks man, i believed her.

Should i just confront her, tell her that what she syas she doesnt show. Cuz she told me " u cant talk to me about anything"

I figure i tell her that she says she misses me but she wont show it and ill give her the example. And tell her that i lost alot of love for her.

or shud i just let it go and then reduce my love for her.
 

ARK

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I think your over analyzing it too much. Just let it go and don't contact her for several days. Women say one thing and do another. Actions speak louder than words.
 

GrimPhallic

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Dood you are taking an AFC approach... Remember SHE needs YOU, not the other way around. NoMoreAFC is absolutely correct, cut all contact with her... This worked for my best friend with his current girl and it has worked for me before. My best friends girl didnt want the title of gf and he wanted it to be more serious, so he cut her off for one week and she called countless times every day and when he finally did answer she was crying her heart out and told him that she was sorry and all that sh!t so now they are a perfect couple. Oh she was 18 by the way. My current girl didnt take us serious (she had some guy friends and a couple were ex's) so when I found out she was talkin to them still (as friends) I cut her off for one week, and she called countless times and was crying when I answered and she appologized and I let her know why I did it and what not and she is now totally obsessed with me :) It just seems to be the thing to do if you want a perfect longterm relationship with a girl... It shocks the fvck out of them and they realize how much THEY need YOU afterwards. Try it... 5 to 7 days of ignoring her... It really makes you into a stronger person as well...
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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