this chick said to me "do you want to get in my pants" wtf!

[aix237]

I known this chick for like a couple of weeks. she is pretty cool but a little awish. she doesnt act really promiscuos, but has a lot of guy friends, sits on peoples laps (usually a guy friend only). she gets hit on a lot by guys and dudes call her up or text late at night. I know all this cause her and her best friend, who is fvcking my roomate, come over a lot and party. i have yet to see her really make a move on anyone. ive been just throwing negs mostly at her so far.
she actually came over to my house when i asked her to a couple of nights ag. i think it was because the way i asked her, a nonthreatening way. she came with her friend when she just knew it was going to be me at the house and my roomate was gone (her friend is fvcking my roomate). then she said she had an extra ticket for a concert so i agreed to go. we got drunk her friend cbd despite me not even showing a sign i wanted her to stay over. but thats a whole other story.

i cant really read this girl its kind of hard. we were at the concert everyone was kind of drunk. then all the sudden
her: do you want to get in my pants? (in my head im like yea duh that would be nice)
me: do you want to get in my pants?
her: no
me: well i guess we are on the same page then.
i think i saved it nicely.

later on in the night it was hard to remember how the next convo started but she initiated it and said something like
her: sorry for asking you that cause now that im single it just seems like every guy wants to get in my pants only.
me: do i really act that sexual towards you?
her: no
me: well there you go
me: anyways (with my arm around her) you know what you are real pretty girl too bad your not my type.
her: blah blah blah (cant remember what she said)

i figure i need to keep negging and disqualifying and wait to get some better ioi's even though i get some but nothing convincing me to go into a3. How should i act with her the next time i see her cause i guarantee it will be thursday or friday (they always come over after the bar). i do want to get on this girl, i do go kino on her sometimes etc. but i really need to still fly under the radar i think?


HERE IS WHY I THINK SHE ASKED
well another thing is that she knows im selective because my roomate always cracks jokes in front of her about how i dont fvck every girl that i get in bed with. she even seems bothered by that. shes like

"thats fvcked up to get a girl in bed with you and not mess around with her, why dont you just not let her sleep in your bed? why do you do that"

me:"if shes not hot enough then i dont, if my back is to you in bed that means you need to leave"
her: "wonder what you do with me i slept in your bed"

thats honestly what was said before.

so she i think she asked the pants question cause she knows i dont fvck anything. she could be trying to see if she is worthy enough for me to fvck her....thats why i think she asked now that i think of it.

 

[aix237]

hahah yea i shouldve been like yea of course what else would i think i wanted with a serious look.

 

[BeyondCharm]

I known this chick for like a couple of weeks. she is pretty cool but a little awish. she doesnt act really promiscuos, but has a lot of guy friends, sits on peoples laps (usually a guy friend only). she gets hit on a lot by guys and dudes call her up or text late at night. I know all this cause her and her best friend, who is fvcking my roomate, come over a lot and party. i have yet to see her really make a move on anyone. ive been just throwing negs mostly at her so far.
she actually came over when i asked her to. i think it was because the way i asked her, a nonthreatening way. she came with her friend when she just knew it was going to be me at the house and my roomate was gone (her friend is fvcking my roomate). then she said she had an extra ticket for a concert so i agreed to go.

i cant really read this girl its kind of hard. we were at the concert everyone was kind of drunk. then all the sudden
her: do you want to get in my pants? (in my head im like yea duh that would be nice)
me: do you want to get in my pants?
her: no
me: well i guess we are on the same page then.
i think i saved it nicely.

later on in the night it was hard to remember how the next convo started but she initiated it and said something like
her: sorry for asking you that cause now that im single it just seems like every guy wants to get in my pants only.
me: do i really act that sexual towards you?
her: no
me: well there you go
me: anyways (with my arm around her) you know what you are real pretty girl too bad your not my type.
her: blah blah blah (cant remember what she said)

i figure i need to keep negging and disqualifying and wait to get some better ioi's even though i get some but nothing convincing me to go into a3. How should i act with her the next time i see her cause i guarantee it will be thursday or friday (they always come over after the bar). i do want to get on this girl, i do go kino on her sometimes etc. but i really need to still fly under the radar i think?

First off, your main problem is you see her as the prize. All your comments/question/worries are based on what she thinks and perceives. You have it all backwards.

There is no radar. You can do whatever you want.

If she asked me "Are you trying to get in my pants?" i'd say "Just because you want me doesn't mean i'm going to start cross-dressing. I like my own pants, thank you "

She's throwing you ****-tests. By taking her seriously, you are giving her what she wants. She knows you're interested dude, whether you think she knows it or not, especially if she's hot.

You need to make her think you are the prize otherwise she will not be interested in you. You could also have said:

Let's pretend she was really negative and you were very positive. It might go like this?

Her: Are you trying to get in my pants?
Me: Is that really your best pickup line?
Her: Haha, yea right, I'm not interested in you!
Me: Of course not. You're interested in getting in my pants and thats it. Look, i'm not just a sausage with feet.
Her: You're a funny guy, but your not my type, sorry. (she's attempting to make you qualify yourself here)
Me: Nice try dork, i'm every womans type. (saying I'm Confident and I'm a man)

 

[Wodan]

Pretend you only enjoy spending time with her because she has such a nice personality and LJBF's her (tell her lets just be friends) then kino her lmao

 

[aix237]

beyond charm you are right. next time i see her i might call her out infront of some people and be like "you should hear hbs pick up line, do you want to get in my pants?"

 

[LeComteDeMonteCristo]

Don't play into her $hit test. Whenever they give you crap like "are you a player?" "do you want to fuk me?" "do you just want to get in my pants?" the are expecting you to get defensive and say no just like you did here. Forget that. Just say yes and move on like it doesn't affect you. It's all about controlling the frame.

 

[Interceptor]

Are you embarassed with your sexuality? Somehow ashamed to show you are attracted?

Are you interested in being just her friend?

Are you not sexually attracted to her?

Do you want to be her boyfriend?

I keep hearing in my head "Friend Zone!!" over and over again.

I would never downplay my attraction to a woman.
Let her feel uncomfortable if she cant handle it. Hell, Im a Man..not some freak show...
If I want her sexually , I let her know it.

I dont want to be her 'friend', man.


I don't know, but I think you actually failed the test.

I think she was trying to find out if you are sexually confident.
But it appears like you demonstrated "NO!! Im not like all those other guys!!! Im nice!!"


I dont think you WILL get any IOIs because you shut her down with your "same page' comment.

Meaning, you have no sexual interest in her.
So in her mind, she may just look at you as an orbiter.

I think you took yourself off her 'radar'
So I dont see how congruent you'll be Escalating with her.
Since you told her you dont like her 'that way'


You may have made this harder on yourself than necessary.

I think a man should never deny his attraction to a woman.

IF a woman is BLUNT with YOU...........be BLUNT with HER.

Do it.

She is trying to communicate in both mediums manspeak and chickspeak.

Her: "do you want to get into my pants?"

Me: "well, that depends.. will you make it worthwhile for me?"

Youre displaying confidence, and your acceptance of your sexuality, and attraction to her. In addition , youre also demonstrating that youre not Desperate as well.

Women KNOW we WANT SEX.

so it can be weird when you dont acknowledge your sexual desire....

Remember, she was BEING BLUNT.
We need to be BLUNT Back at her.





Or you could just cut through all the BS and say :
" Of course, look at you...you're smoking, babe. Me like.... "


And leave the ball in her court....

But NEVER try to EVADE her.
This is super important.
Women do not want to be with guys who are insincere with them, or their own desire.
They want to know if youre genuine.

So always be genuine with her.


Why would anyone want to lie about their desire?

Do you see the incongruency here?






When she's blunt with you, you be blunt back to her.


It's a test.
And she is used to all the guys not being up front.

Think about this..what if she DID want you to say 'Yes, of course."?


a woman is going to be disgusted with your sexual attraction to her, and your connection and alignment with your desires???!!

If so, leave her alone.
Shes too uptight, and doesnt 'get it'.


Now, it may be weird if you try to escalate when you 'lied' to her....

The only thing I can offer is try to make your SOIs more and more present in your interactions...
but only when she starts giving you something that really intrigues and interests you.

So for now, maybe you can play it 'safe' and as you two interact, slowly introduce how much you're starting to 'like her'.
Look at this is a qualificaton stage.

ie youre just like every other chick until proven otherwise..

her: so the other day I was (watching , doing, seeing, whatever ) XYZ and....
you: hey, I didnt know you liked XYZ...thats sexy..I like that...."

that way you may be able to dig yourself out of that hole...


good luck, hope it helps

 

[aix237]

so if say yes it wont fvck up everything considering i stopped the challenge right there and exposed my cards? so next time i see her should i say listen hb i lied i want to get in your pants?

 

[Warrior74]

so if say yes it wont fvck up everything considering i stopped the challenge right there and exposed my cards? so next time i see her should i say listen hb i lied i want to get in your pants?

that's lame man, do not say that lame sh!t. its too late now. just start all over with this girl, get in some kino and having fun.

or move on to a new one.

 

[LeComteDeMonteCristo]

so if say yes it wont fvck up everything considering i stopped the challenge right there and exposed my cards? so next time i see her should i say listen hb i lied i want to get in your pants?

No way man. Too late for that now. I was just saying for future reference.

Look, women are not stupid. Forget all the business about not playing your cards. They KNOW you want to sleep with them, you're not kidding anyone.

 

[BeyondCharm]

aix, you only read HALF OF MY ADVICE. The other half said you need to stop seeing her as the prize. By approaching her and saying "I lied, i really want you", guess what, you just TOLD HER SHE'S THE PRIZE. Pay attention!!!!


Her: "ARe you just trying to get into my pants?
Me: First you must win me over.

Hahahahaha!

 

[Interceptor]

so if say yes it wont fvck up everything considering i stopped the challenge right there and exposed my cards? so next time i see her should i say listen hb i lied i want to get in your pants?

Dude, use common sense...
Of COURSE you CANT just all of a sudden start hopping up and down and shouting "I meant YES!!! Dear God , I lied! I meant YESS!!!!"

C'mon now, man.....



Challenge is either a made up superficial 'challenge' that is 'acted' by insecure guys....

OR.....

you are a REAL Challenge because of WHO you ARE. not what you 'say'...


I think you may want to re investigate the notion of 'exposing your cards'.

Men dont act out of fear . we act out of proper reflection and weighing the pros and cons..

You like women , dont you?


Wheres the DANGER in revealing THAT?


"Hey WORLD, I like WOMEN!!! All sorts of women!!!! I want to bang women!!"

Youre a Man. Heterosexual, no?


I think you may need to look at how the 'challenge' and the 'showing of cards' is REALLY not helping you the way you are hoping it will.


Being a challenge is a natural part of BEING for the active, ambitious sex worthy man, whom cna make things happen, and is dedicated to his life and has PASSION for life.
He dorsnt need to 'act' challenging....he simply IS challenging.

He isnt going to waste time with some time waster, man.

 

[DonGorgon]

LOL.. she wants you to want to be in her pants... but se doesnt not want you to know she is a ho.. flip it on her... tell her you hope she wants you for more than just F'ing

 

[aix237]

well after she said that stupid sh1t we were getting food and she touched me on the arm and i said "you cant just touch me like that it will cost you 5 dollars each time"




i dont know my ex was a huge sexual aw. plenty of dudes chasing her and throwing themselves at her. i did not show any sexual interest in her (slept in her bed with her 2 weeks straight without making one move) and honestly just wanting to be friends with her at first. well she got so fvcking crazy in the beginning and was calling me up asking me to be her bf and other crazy sh1t. she pulled out all the cards to try and get me. during the early time she kept on saying i hate it i dont want to be just someone a guy fvcks i want more than that. well i was that guy who just didnt want to fvck her and i let her know it and i let her know that i enjoyed her company.

that situation somes pretty similar to this in that she said the same thing of im sick of just having guys wanting to fvck me only.

 

[Interceptor]

Then what I suggest is look at this as a qualifying stage.
And slowly introduce your "newly discovered' SOIs into your interactions

Slolwly start 'discovering' her, and show her that you actually DO appreciate her as a Woman
But be careful with the 'friend' angle. Youre a man.
Never be too 'safe'.

 

[aix237]

so your talkin a3 stuff right, bait hook reel release? giving her ioi's after she tries to qualify herself right? what is sois? signs of interest?

i was just thinking, if i just said yes i do want to get in your pants when she asked she thinks she already won me over without her qualifying herself or doing a single thing to win me.

 

[BeyondCharm]

LOL.. she wants you to want to be in her pants... but se doesnt not want you to know she is a ho.. flip it on her... tell her you hope she wants you for more than just F'ing

Hence my comment: I'm more than just a sausage with feet.

 

[aix237]

sfda

 

[Interceptor]

she thinks she already won me over without her qualifying herself or doing a single thing to win me.

You can read minds???!!

You are not responsible for what she thinks about you.

You 'lose' nothing by simply being blunt when she straight up asked you.

So you want to be 'different' by denying your sexual desire?
OK, if it works for you.
Good luck.

 

[aix237]

well another thing is that she knows im selective because my roomate always cracks jokes in front of her about how i dont fvck every girl that i get in bed with. she even seems bothered by that. shes like

"thats fvcked up to get a girl in bed with you and not mess around with her, why dont you just not let her sleep in your bed? why do you do that"

me:"if shes not hot enough then i dont, if my back is to you in bed that means you need to leave"
her: "wonder what you do with me i slept in your bed"

thats honestly what was said before.

so she i think she asked the pants question cause she knows i dont fvck anything. she could be trying to see if she is worthy enough for me to fvck her....thats why i think she asked now that i think of it.