"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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They kind of KNOW what you like them...

Babnik

Master Don Juan
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When you approach a woman and start talking to her then she already knows you like her...she knows when you start flirting.

Some of you say that you should pull back at some point and show disinterest to make her want you more.

So, you're saying that I don't do that and still end up making out within 10 minutes of meeting her then she is likely to flake as far dating goes because she knows for sure that I like her?

What if she already likes YOU?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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ObieJuan

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If she likes you she will make it known by returning your calls. If she flakes and makes excuses then you know her interest level wasn't as high as you thought it was.
 

Cod3r

Master Don Juan
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When you approach a woman and start talking to her then she already knows you like her...she knows when you start flirting.

Some of you say that you should pull back at some point and show disinterest to make her want you more.

So, you're saying that I don't do that and still end up making out within 10 minutes of meeting her then she is likely to flake as far dating goes because she knows for sure that I like her?

What if she already likes YOU?
You have a SERIOUS flaw in your game, I've been reading your posts and I'm not sure exactly what it is yet... Give me a while, I'll figure it out


-Cod3r
 

Babnik

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Cod3r said:
You have a SERIOUS flaw in your game, I've been reading your posts and I'm not sure exactly what it is yet... Give me a while, I'll figure it out


-Cod3r
I don't have a game, and not planning on having one. I'm out of it. I do things how I like and want, and if it works then it works. If it doesn't then it doesn't.

I feel that doing NOT what I want downgrades me down to some level of pu*sy-chaser. So far it kind of works, btw. Not always, but it does.
 

danielzxc

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Cod3r said:
You have a SERIOUS flaw in your game, I've been reading your posts and I'm not sure exactly what it is yet... Give me a while, I'll figure it out


-Cod3r
I get the feeling he's just not really a very sociable kinda guy. You know those stone-faced types who hang in the background at parties with a beer in their hand? And an I-don't-take-any-shyt look on their faces that is believable enough that not only don't people give them shyt but they don't even bother talking to them? That's Babnik, imo. And he likes it that way. Fine. But then he wants to pick up chicks to and <clunk> he has to shift gears and suggest that he's a fun guy to hang out with. Not easily done. His problem is compounded because, as he says, he's Russian and isn't fully comfortable socializing the "American" way, or, said differently, socializing "in English" (even though he's clearly fluent in the language TECHNICALLY--it's not him CULTURALLY).
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Babnik

Master Don Juan
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danielzxc said:
I get the feeling he's just not really a very sociable kinda guy. You know those stone-faced types who hang in the background at parties with a beer in their hand? And an I-don't-take-any-shyt look on their faces that is believable enough that not only don't people give them shyt but they don't even bother talking to them? That's Babnik, imo. And he likes it that way. Fine. But then he wants to pick up chicks to and <clunk> he has to shift gears and suggest that he's a fun guy to hang out with. Not easily done. His problem is compounded because, as he says, he's Russian and isn't fully comfortable socializing the "American" way, or, said differently, socializing "in English" (even though he's clearly fluent in the language TECHNICALLY--it's not him CULTURALLY).

Right. Almost. I am not like that with Germans and Austrians and Brits. Its so much easier with them.


THING IS. My friend, an American kid, is also like me and he pulls girls like crazy. He is even MORE of an outsider. I'm serious. You can barely see him talk.
 

Jay Jay

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Some confusion here methinks...

Its okay for a girl to know you are "interested" in her. In fact it is a massive turn on for girls.

Its when you start pulling out all the stops to win a girls approval when all you know about her is that she's an attractive female that you have a problem.

Its in the attitude.

So good attitude is: This chick seems interesting. I'll see what she's like and find out if she's fun. If she meets my standards I might even gift her some lovin'.

Bad attitude is: This chick is what I am desperate for. I will do anything to make her like me.

There are no absolute rules in these kinds of things. You don't HAVE to do any particular thing when dealing with girls. There are just various tactics that can be used depnding on the situation. Sometimes the situation requires you to show active disinterest, sometimes it isn't necessary. With practice you develop the intuition to know when to play it cool and when to turn up the heat.

So no, a girl isn't more likely to flake if she knows you're "interested" in her. But she is more likely to flake if submit to her in order to win her approval.
 

Babnik

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Jay Jay said:
Its okay for a girl to know you are "interested" in her. In fact it is a massive turn on for girls.

Its when you start pulling out all the stops to win a girls approval when all you know about her is that she's an attractive female that you have a problem.

Its in the attitude.

So good attitude is: This chick seems interesting. I'll see what she's like and find out if she's fun. If she meets my standards I might even gift her some lovin'.

Bad attitude is: This chick is what I am desperate for. I will do anything to make her like me.

There are no absolute rules in these kinds of things. You don't HAVE to do any particular thing when dealing with girls. There are just various tactics that can be used depnding on the situation. Sometimes the situation requires you to show active disinterest, sometimes it isn't necessary. With practice you develop the intuition to know when to play it cool and when to turn up the heat.

So no, a girl isn't more likely to flake if she knows you're "interested" in her. But she is more likely to flake if submit to her in order to win her approval.
I never submit to anyone. I just make it like a flirty interview where I am the one checking her out and she either has to pass or not pass. I make it reasonable, but if the chick passes then I kiss her. WRONG?

Its just I never had girls TRY to submit me. They never try to walk over me. They THEMSELVES often accept what I say or they just disagree and choose the other. None of them EVER forced their ways upon me.

Why is that? Possibly not comfortable enough and not trusting enough to even start her own game?
 
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