they go out with me, but no hold hand or kiss on 2nd date? why

[joe45]

ey

i met a few girls randomly on the street , malls. and i got her number
and we go for coffee. second date we might wathc movie and i would
sometimes try to hold her hand and she would brush it away or try to
hold her by her waist and she would brush it off. so im guessing why
did she even accept going out with me in the first place



i had another one who would let me hold her hand but at the end of the
second date i tried to go for a kiss and she just reject it and moved
away after 4 attempts. why did she even bother going out with me



after how many dates can you hold her hand and get a kiss.

these 2 girls are japanese overseas esl students

 

[jtlancer]

Although it may not seem like it, I suspect what is happening
is that you are skipping steps in kino escalation. IME number of dates,
time spent with them, etc, is irrelevant if you are not doing light kino
from the beginning. Holding her hand/kissing is not step one.

 

[joe45]

Although it may not seem like it, I suspect what is happening
is that you are skipping steps in kino escalation. IME number of dates,
time spent with them, etc, is irrelevant if you are not doing light kino
from the beginning. Holding her hand/kissing is not step one.

k what is step one then. what is light kino
thanks

 

[SandHawk]

Light kino is the act of touching up the girl. Touch the side of her upper arms, walk with arms hooked.

When a girl brushes off your attempts at holding hands or holding her, you didn't create enough attraction. There are several ways to up the attraction building, and one of them is eye contact(and giving her 'the look'. Don't ask me how, but there's a certain way to look at girls that will make them blush instantly). And the other one is kino. And kino is VERY important, because is causes the release of oxytocin, also known as the cuddle hormone. It causes bonding, relaxing and the urge to touch to occur in the brain.

How to do it? When you're bouncing from location to location, just walk next to her, extend your arm and look at her. 99% of the time, she'll hook her arms in. Voila, you're touching her, and at the same time appear coming off as a real gentleman. When sitting down, try to sit down to her, instead of across the table. Gives you a bit off excuse to every now and then brush against her, and when you're teasing her, touch her arms/hands. Even a fistbump is a form of light kino.

Once you got some light kino mixed in, up the kino some more by tickling(only when she's comfortable), brushing hair out of her face, that sort of things. And when she's all comfy with that, get real close and move in for the kiss. Go read the DJ Bible and Bootcamp for information and background information on kino. There's a lot of background info on this, much more well explained than what I did.

 

[maqnetik]

did you buy these girls free stuff?

 

[f283000]

listen to what sandhawk said.

The reason she didn't let you hold hands joe is because that was probably the first time you had touched her the whole night! Because you didn't get her used to your touch by the time you first touched her she found it weird!

The moment you first meet a girl for a date you need to touch her! Whether it be a hug, light touch on the side of the arm or whatever. If you do this from the start of your date it will give you a license to do it throughout the date. If you first touch her after an hour into your date she might likely find it weird and creepy. If you touch her from the start of the date she will assume that's just the way you are and see it as a natural thing.

You need to keep this up throughout the date. You need to go on with the mentality that you are going to touch this girl dozens of times throughout your date.

If you're just starting out with kino just do the classic touch on the side of her arm. Don't keep your hand there for more than a second or 2. Do this a bunch of times throughout the date. If you keep doing this throughout the date soon you'll be comfortable doing more advanced kino.

When first doing kino on girls you might feel nervous and it might not seem natural and it might seem scripted (which is likely to creep her out). That's why just do the classic light touch on the arm to start with and you'll become a guy that is just natural and girls will never notice what you're trying to do to them.

 

[BobMo']

Next time you see her, touch her on the back of the upper arm, look into her eyes, and say "How are you, I missed you." Then lead her toward where you're going next by putting your arm around her lower back and guiding her in the general direction. Watch some old movies. It still works.

 

[loonik]

dont be afraid of kino. as an aspiring dj i can vouch for the success of light kino.
the trick is you have to take successive escalations of kino. Here are some examples that i use:
if she hurts her finger, ask her to let you see it. hold her finger in your hand, massage it gently, if you have the balls kiss it
when you bounce from one place to the next, take the LEAD. walk a few steps ahead of her; this will confuse her and get her thinking: "is he leaving without me?" then look back at her and extend your hand for her to take.
use hugs as your default method of saluting girls.
share a "secret" handshake that only u use with her.
high five her when she does something that you like, or when she agrees with something you said.
when she asks you a question, tell her you have to whisper it to her because its something personal to you that no one else can know about. this gives you an excuse to be physically near her.
when you set up a future date, seal the deal with a pinky promise.
these r just things i do. they are arranged in no particular order but are intended to give you some ideas.

 

[Maximus Rex]

The Pick Up Artist, The New and Improved Art of Seduction by Mystery p.18-19

When you are interacting with a woman, touching should be a normal part of the interaction from the very beginning. Even innocuous little social touches, such as gently pushing a woman's shoulder, or touching her forearm, or throwing, your arm around her-you must be constantly doing this with her. That way, physical touch becomes, a normal way part of the way that the two of you behave together. It would feel weird not to touch.

If you wait too long, if you don't start touching her and her friends when you first meet them, then even innocuous touches will seem weird later on.

So you see, the reason it feels so weird when you try to make a move at the end of the night is that you waited too long, you should have been touching her the whole time.

Lesson Three:​

Force yourself to start using innocuous social touches as normal part of your conversation with a woman, such as touching her shoulder as you say something to her. Just force yourself to use more touching during your social interactions.

 

[Alien]

after how many dates can you hold her hand and get a kiss.

If you dont kiss on the first date you can throw away her number.

 

[blackwolf]

shes prolly not that into you. im on my third date tonight.. first date we made out like crazy - she holds my hand a lot too, heh. last night (2nd date) she gave me a hand job and was talkin dirty. i cant imagine what she'll do to me tonight... anyway, i think it depends how much the girl is into you.

 

[mustfirstregister]

If you dont kiss on the first date you can throw away her number.

I agree

 

[Huffman]

Hey, since the OP went on coffee dates...
How do you do any kino when you're sitting opposite to the girl? I mean you can fool around with the legs, but I think you'd first need to build up to there. Ideas? Other than "don't sit there all the time"

Also about HUGS: I can support what others have said here! You must start with it and not worry whether she'll accept it! She probably expects it! And she can see right through you if you hesitate! So both as a HI and GOODBYE hug her. Just hug and start/keep talking. This way she has no chance to complain (or whatever you fear). After 5sec it's forgotten and you are the winner. Now that I think about it, this is actually the case with any "ballsy" move, if you want to call it that!

 

[Lucifero]

If you dont kiss on the first date you can throw away her number.

I say Second.

 

[omkara]

You're complaining about not getting a hand hold?

Dude, I totally hand-hold closed this girl last night!

One time a girl tried to initiate kino with me by challenging me to a thumb war. I declined because I thought it was childish and stupid. Knowing what I know now though, I probably would have accepted, even though I still think it's stupid.

 

[J Roc]

LOL @ hand hold close!

 

[escaleraroyal]

ey

i met a few girls randomly on the street , malls. and i got her number
and we go for coffee. second date we might wathc movie and i would
sometimes try to hold her hand and she would brush it away or try to
hold her by her waist and she would brush it off. so im guessing why
did she even accept going out with me in the first place



i had another one who would let me hold her hand but at the end of the
second date i tried to go for a kiss and she just reject it and moved
away after 4 attempts. why did she even bother going out with me



after how many dates can you hold her hand and get a kiss.

these 2 girls are japanese overseas esl students

Where were you guys at when you try to kiss her?

 

[WhatdoyoumeanAIDS]

hey.... youtube a video called "how to kino 1/10"