Then she asked "How old are you?"

[bigneil]

I met a real beauty in NYC one Saturday this month. She made eye contact and smiled so I said hello. She quickly approached me. We spoke for no more than 3 minutes when I cut to the chase scene and asked if she was single. "Yes" she said and asked for my phone. She programmed in her first and last name and phone number.

I texted the next night and told her she had pretty eyes and she wrote back and asked me out for the next time she was in town. We texted a lot after that, exchanging photos and she wrote about 25 long messages, most on Christmas day. She wanted to share every detail.

Then she asked how old I was. Even though she is 24 I told her the truth: I'm 42 (having been dating the now 21 year old for over a year (and who is now talking children together) I took a chance).

She said she thought I was 35 and had never dated older but that "it's just a number".

Never heard from her again.

I hate that it encourages me to lie but I never will.

It's especially discouraging she would let it override our having hit it off the way we did but know that women are like that.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

Ah yes, another example of how texting KILLS relationships!

Do you really, REALLY think your age was the reason she deaded the conversation? Far from it. There are actually two reasons here that she stopped it: one is because you spent all that time messaging her back and forth and she started to get bored of you; and two is because of distance - when you're not able to see a girl face to face on a regular basis they can become easily distracted by other guys who actually live NEAR them.

When she asked you your age, that was her way of searching for an answer from you that would allow her to convince herself to stop talking to you. Her response to your age - "I've never dated older" - is a lie: almost every guy she's dated has been older than her. Maybe not 18 years older, but older nonetheless. Heck, I knew 17 year old girls back in high school who were dating 35 year olds. Plus, I live in L.A., where a 20+ year age difference happens all the time. Don't let the "age" thing fool you - when they like you, they like you regardless of how much older you are.

Of course, there's always the chance that she still DOES like you - how long has it been since you've heard from her, a day? Two days? Have you been messaging her but not hearing anything back? You're not giving us all the details to the story. In general, though, excessive texting + long distance tend to be relationship killers.

 

[bigneil]

I meant she had never dated older than 35. Granted 18 years older is a lot. We only sent 2-3 messages per day on average, and not every day. Met on the 15th. I replied to her last text the day after Christmas and sent one more today but its been 6 days. Long distance is a factor as she lives in NC and I live in TX and we both travel to NYC for work.

 

[omega05]

And you think it's your age that's the reason you havent heard from her in 6 days? But on the flip, 42 and 24 is kind of spaced out. Also, you live in TX and she in NC? that's fail written all over it

 

[Mr. Bond]

When I'm asked how old I am, I always smile, look her in the eyes, and add 40 years to my actual age.

Girl: How old are you?
Bond: 67.
Girl: Hahahaha come on, really?
Bond: 67! What?
Girl: SERIOUSLY! How old!?
Bond: I'm offended. I'm 67! I exfoliate!
Girl: (laughing, eventually gives up...old man jokes and role playing follow)

 

[zekko]

If she disappeared once she found out your age, that does sound suspicious. But I do respect that you didn't lie about it, and were comfortable enough with yourself to tell her the truth. So kudos for that. But let's face it, long distance relationships seldom work.

 

[lamobatsman]

Ah yes, another example of how texting KILLS relationships!

Do you really, REALLY think your age was the reason she deaded the conversation? Far from it. There are actually two reasons here that she stopped it: one is because you spent all that time messaging her back and forth and she started to get bored of you; and two is because of distance - when you're not able to see a girl face to face on a regular basis they can become easily distracted by other guys who actually live NEAR them.

When she asked you your age, that was her way of searching for an answer from you that would allow her to convince herself to stop talking to you. Her response to your age - "I've never dated older" - is a lie: almost every guy she's dated has been older than her. Maybe not 18 years older, but older nonetheless. Heck, I knew 17 year old girls back in high school who were dating 35 year olds. Plus, I live in L.A., where a 20+ year age difference happens all the time. Don't let the "age" thing fool you - when they like you, they like you regardless of how much older you are.

Of course, there's always the chance that she still DOES like you - how long has it been since you've heard from her, a day? Two days? Have you been messaging her but not hearing anything back? You're not giving us all the details to the story. In general, though, excessive texting + long distance tend to be relationship killers.

I dont completely agree with harry. I think some girls are put off by the age difference especially by 20 hours or so. I know most of my girl mates wont date 42 year olds. FACT

 

[lamobatsman]

And also i dont believ in this excessive texting and long distance- i have had friends do this and work out. Iv had friends message and talk hours a day on text/watsapp/fb etc for weeks and even a cupl of months before meeting up and it working out

 

[Stagger Lee]

I dont completely agree with harry. I think some girls are put off by the age difference especially by 20 hours or so. I know most of my girl mates wont date 42 year olds. FACT

I agree. It's pretty clear she was in to bigneil and once she realized his age cut contact. Age matters a lot to younger girls today no matter how much guys want to blame it on other things.

 

[bigneil]

Some girls have no problem with it. The 21 year old started talking kids and I said "I'm twice your age" but she said "So what? You don't look it. We match. Don't you think we match?" Other girls have noted that. Also, if the age difference feels ok today they only catch up to us over time.

I just hate that the other girl (4 years older than a girl I've dated for over a year) blatantly promotes lying by dropping me on the spot.

 

[st_99]

anytime a girl has asked me my age i ended up fvcking her so i take it as a really good signal if asked.

i lied twice because the girls were 10 years younger and to me, it was more important that i fvcked them and less important that i remained honest and perhaps established something longer term.

i fvcked one of them in my car and never saw her again, and the other one actually found out my real age and i still
fvcked her a few more times after.

 

[spang]

shiat ill be 32 this month. call the fvckin nursing home and get me a room.:crazy: i think ill lie and tell the 20 year olds im at school with that im like 25 from now on.

 

[zekko]

I think most girls will say "I won't go out with any guy older than xx". But when they meet the right guy that will usually go right out the window.

I've never understood why it would be so vitally important to fvck a particular girl that you would lie about your age to pull it off. Seems like it smacks of desperation to me, there are always other women. I'd rather have a girl fvck me for who I really am. But I know there are lots of guys who do this sort of thing, I guess it just depends on where your priorities lie.

Seems to me that if you lie about your age (or whatever) you are saying "I'm not good enough as I am for you to have sex with". But that's PUAs, I guess. Plus I know a lot of people lie just as naturally as taking a drink of water.