"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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The Wise Older Brother

evolvingnerd

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i'm the elder brother, but i need some help
now, brothers are always competing and comparing each other in every respect.

and to date, i've pretty much beaten my brother in every respect, be it related to studies, sports, jobs, music, whatever. however, i've been quite the nerd, and i think he felt it nessesary to believe he was better than me socially, and more importantly, at getting the girls.

now, a few nights ago, we were at a mutual party, and i rocked :D

i was funny, spontaeous and witty, and i had one girl throw herself all over me. now, he was pretty much attached to one girl, and even then, i upped the C+F on her, and i had her continuing to try to get my attention, infront of my brother

now, i haven't spoken about any of this, but i think i'm starting to realise that my brother resents me, because he's always been in my shadow

i've also started to notice that he's very passive agressive, and he takes no hesitation in calling my a dumbass or d!ckhead or anythign like that, and when we're out together, he outright insults me in front of company - not too often, but often enough to piss me off

so how can i go about being a good brother, without pitying him (that'll no doubt make things worse)
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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JT47319

Master Don Juan
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Well, first of all, haven't you heard of "Bros before hos?" Why were you mackin' on her if your brother was interested?

I'm all for stealing and wooing girls away from random dudes. Competition makes you better, but I never game a girl that one of my friends is interested in unless it's pretty obvious that she's totally disinterested in him AND he gives me the ok.

Everyone else is fair game.
 

Bonhomme

Master Don Juan
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... he takes no hesitation in calling my a dumbass or d!ckhead or anythign like that, and when we're out together, he outright insults me in front of company - not too often, but often enough to piss me off

But if you c0ckbloced him on the one gal, he has reason to be pissed off. Let him do his thing with his gal, and you concentrate on yours. If you just happen to be socializing normally and the gal gets attracted to you, then you haven't done anything wrong, and he should learn from you, rather than hold it against you.

The public insults hurt him more than they do you. That's typical low-status behavior. The others may even think he's a bit nuts. Perhaps -- after this thread fades a few pages back -- you can tell him about this site, and start mentioning -- in private conversations -- that his attitude is holding him back and you know he can do better if he quits being jealous of you an starts to make the best of what he's got.
 
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