"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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The Unintentional Field Report

Kailex

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Alright, I had a much longer post set up with the explanation of this evening for 4th of July and it erased itself.

Here's the shorter version.

HB-8, that's 40 years old, attends a BBQ with a bunch of fellow co-workers. Other single thirties, hit on her for most of the afternoon. I was just there for beer and fireworks. She comes over to me, starts talking to me... I'm laid back.

We work together some times, but I never knew her age. She voluntarily gives it up to which i respond:

"Really... 40? Wow..."

She seemed to expect some comment about how good she looked for her age."

"...I thought you didn't look a day under 45."

She seemed shocked but laughed.
Night continues, I'm subconsciously dropping neg-hits and then kino. I thought this was normal as I WASN'T TRYING to get with her. I was just thinknig: Co-Workers = Friendly.

Apparently, SHE didn't.
And it didn't hit me til I was talking to her about how I love rollercoasters but I'm afraid of heights and said she'd love it if I called her so we could go together next weekend.

THAT'S when it hit me that all the neg-hits, C&F, Kino had her invested, specially since I wasn't trying. She inputed her phone into mine and pressed Send so she could have it.

At this point, I blatantly realized what was happening and tried to pull away from the situation. That made it WORSE.
She was even MORE into me because of that.

Now, the double whammy of single mom (kid's 17) and co-worker were what were keeping me from realizing what was going on. I truly wasn't interested. At the end of the night she told me she had a great time (wtf, this wasn't a date) and leaned in for a hug and as I pulled back, she gave me a kiss.

Great.

Now, you might be asking, what's the point of this thread... it's basically for me to recognize that even though I wasn't trying... I was subconsciously laying down the DJ field tactics and it worked to a certain degree. Other men were trying too hard to talk to her and get her number, but here I was, not even TRYING and she gave me the number. Had I truly pushed this further, she would have ended up at my apartment with her ankles wrapped around my neck.

Secondary point of this thread is to discuss with the other Mature Men in this forum: Has this happened to you? Have you become the "victim" of unknowingly displaying DJ tools even though you haven't tried and what results has it garnered foryou?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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SoldMySoul

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I went out with a cougar several years ago when I was about 35... I think she lied about her age and was probably late forties, but was pushing mid forties.

I was not really trying anything with her. She made comments about me not commenting her on her appearance and crap like that. I was cordial throughout the night, laid back and was not totally into the experience. She looked pretty good for her age.

Wound up drunk back at her apartment and did the deed half a$$ed due to being so drunk.

Disinterest works wonders that is for sure. It seems to work especially well on those that are declining in their value and know it!

Later on I went back again with this psycho nut and she showed her a$$ to the bar staff and left all pissed. This is when I started opening my eyes to what was out there. The older women seem to have the majority of issues from my experience or it could be that the older I get I start to see more stuff.
 

jophil28

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Kailex said:
Night continues, I'm subconsciously dropping neg-hits and then kino. I thought this was normal as I WASN'T TRYING to get with her. I was just thinknig: Co-Workers = Friendly.
Yes, after a few years of consciously practicing c&f, one starts to do it habitually - with results that are oftentimes unwanted.
I do believe that you resisted wisely - those flings with "older women at the office" rarely end well, take it from me.
I used to tell them that I had a fiance "back home".

At least, back in the day, a guy could get a BJ in the stationary room. I am not sure that stationary rooms still exist do they ?
 

ThunderMaverick

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jophil28 said:
Yes, after a few years of consciously practicing c&f, one starts to do it habitually - with results that are oftentimes unwanted.
I do believe that you resisted wisely - those flings with "older women at the office" rarely end well, take it from me.
I used to tell them that I had a fiance "back home".

At least, back in the day, a guy could get a BJ in the stationary room. I am not sure that stationary rooms still exist do they ?

What's a stationary room?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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jophil28

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ThunderMaverick said:
What's a stationary room?
Opps, I meant "stationery" (sp) room where various paper supplies were stacked on shelves - invoice blanks, order forms and printer paper and so on.
It was a small room like a large closet and often had a convenient lock on the door.
 

Jitterbug

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Kailex said:
Secondary point of this thread is to discuss with the other Mature Men in this forum: Has this happened to you? Have you become the "victim" of unknowingly displaying DJ tools even though you haven't tried and what results has it garnered foryou?
Yeah I do it naturally and when it's unintentional, it can get me some unwanted results. Last time, I got a girl so keen that she kept calling me late at night on weekends asking how I was and what I was up to. Then she came to visit my mother (her mum & mine are acquaintances) a few times to find out more about me...

All because we caught up for a drink one time with a few other friends and I was teasing, flirting & kinoing her and getting her to talk about herself a lot without realising what I was really doing.

Other times, it's not so bad. I've unintentionally done the same to a few bangable older women, and when they got to the game-on stage, I realised what I was doing, shrugged and thought "oh what the hell!" and went for the full ride.

Rarely that I managed to game attractive young girls (my real targets) unintentionally, but the few times it's happened, it was quite memorable.
 

zekko

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Mojogoat

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For the record, stationery rooms still exist, we have one in our office. Glad to be of service.
Haven't had a bj in it though...
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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