Jon341427
Don Juan
the same goes for different places in the US. im from NY, and when in NYC (manhattan), people dont make eye contact with you or say anything to you. now im in florida (tallahassee) for school and people are a TON friendlier.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
The UK Girls Thread and Social Ineptitude
- Thread starter Jon341427
- Start date
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
RBB
Senior Don Juan
That's cos they love your cheesy accent. I work in a hospitality field in the US and people always start conversations with me at work. I don't think it's good for business cos I have other people to serve! When I was there earlier this year I managed to have some great conversations although the old me was AFC in every aspect. I can't wait to get back there now.I'm eager to read some posts on the differences between women in the UK and US as it will provide insight to the DJs who travel a lot. This site has shown me what is socially norm with US HBs but let's see the best & worst the Brits have to offer!
RedPill
Master Don Juan
Shezzler, here is why.
Obviously, society and people's backgrounds, etc all factor in. Having lived in different parts of America I can definitely say it is different regionally. From my experience, there are two main factors that cause these attitude differences: regional economy and the weather.
Where I live in the midwest, the far majority of economic activity in the past has been factory work. Unions had allowed for decades factory workers to be highly overpaid for the labor they provided. Well, now all those companies are packing up and heading for either a different place in America or a country where the labor unions don't exist. Life is getting tough around here for the middle class guy. Factor in the fact that 6 months out of the year the weather is cold and the sky is gray, and during that time everyone has kinda this "survivalist" mentality. People are hospitable, but generally unfriendly and suspicious of everyone else.
Now, when I lived down south, people were not hurting for jobs. Also it never snows down south, and the sun shines a lot more. Most follks are generally in a good mood and outgoing. There is more wealth on the whole, and the local economies are more stable. I don't know what the economy is like in the UK, but I'm pretty certain it's not a "good weather" area. So there's your answer. My guess is that you find people there a lot more friendly in the summer months.
Obviously, society and people's backgrounds, etc all factor in. Having lived in different parts of America I can definitely say it is different regionally. From my experience, there are two main factors that cause these attitude differences: regional economy and the weather.
Where I live in the midwest, the far majority of economic activity in the past has been factory work. Unions had allowed for decades factory workers to be highly overpaid for the labor they provided. Well, now all those companies are packing up and heading for either a different place in America or a country where the labor unions don't exist. Life is getting tough around here for the middle class guy. Factor in the fact that 6 months out of the year the weather is cold and the sky is gray, and during that time everyone has kinda this "survivalist" mentality. People are hospitable, but generally unfriendly and suspicious of everyone else.
Now, when I lived down south, people were not hurting for jobs. Also it never snows down south, and the sun shines a lot more. Most follks are generally in a good mood and outgoing. There is more wealth on the whole, and the local economies are more stable. I don't know what the economy is like in the UK, but I'm pretty certain it's not a "good weather" area. So there's your answer. My guess is that you find people there a lot more friendly in the summer months.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Hey bud
im from south uk and kinda agree with Redphill about the whole weather thing there have also been studies into this and it’s proven that the weather effects peoples moods, I mean animals and effected by the moon and shizit, what makes us so special that we can’t be effected also. But society doesn’t help either.
Another thing, it’s likely that if you give a guy eye contact he’s likely to scowl at you and if you say “hi” its probable that you’d get a smack on the nose cos he thinks your a gay coming onto him, and the women, they don’t even look at you. eyes straight down, but to be honest it you actually make the effort to talk to most people you’ll find their ok, its just their barrier needs to be broken down. I think most people are more of afraid of talking to people encase they get a bad.
im from south uk and kinda agree with Redphill about the whole weather thing there have also been studies into this and it’s proven that the weather effects peoples moods, I mean animals and effected by the moon and shizit, what makes us so special that we can’t be effected also. But society doesn’t help either.
Another thing, it’s likely that if you give a guy eye contact he’s likely to scowl at you and if you say “hi” its probable that you’d get a smack on the nose cos he thinks your a gay coming onto him, and the women, they don’t even look at you. eyes straight down, but to be honest it you actually make the effort to talk to most people you’ll find their ok, its just their barrier needs to be broken down. I think most people are more of afraid of talking to people encase they get a bad.
cant think of a user name
Master Don Juan
I think it's also a "big city" phenomenon -- people have associated more crime, more weirdos and generally more danger in big cities (such as London, NYC), compared to suburbia. As a result people may have more shields up in the city.
RedPill
Master Don Juan
Big city vs. smaller town is a good point. My younger brother had some good words awhile back that may add to this discussion. He said, "If you're physically fit, socially aware, and educated you are treated like a god around here. However, if you, being the same person, moved to a place where there's lots of money and hot chicks and stuff to do, you won't stand out at all."
Culturally, I percieve a gulf between American and UK women.
Yankees may hate me saying this, but I always find UK women far more independent and feminist than their US counterparts. Attitudes in the UK seem generally more modern than the majority of the US across the spectrum.
I guess all I'm saying is, girls in the UK seem to me to be just plain harder-bitten, grittier. Less responsive to a PU generally, until they hit the weekend and get utterly wasted - another symptom of their hardbitten attitude - which is when they become approachable. The whole 'weekend culture' is more formalised in the UK.
Yankees may hate me saying this, but I always find UK women far more independent and feminist than their US counterparts. Attitudes in the UK seem generally more modern than the majority of the US across the spectrum.
I guess all I'm saying is, girls in the UK seem to me to be just plain harder-bitten, grittier. Less responsive to a PU generally, until they hit the weekend and get utterly wasted - another symptom of their hardbitten attitude - which is when they become approachable. The whole 'weekend culture' is more formalised in the UK.
Royal Elite
Banned
NO GUTS NO GLORY!!!
A rapist while give you a explanation that is perfectly logical to him on why he did it did, so too with the wuss!
95% of guys problems is FEAR!
Most of you are not winning because most of you are not playing!
Stop with all of these crazy excuses of whyt you are not scoring, get over your insecurity and fears and the sky will open up!
A rapist while give you a explanation that is perfectly logical to him on why he did it did, so too with the wuss!
95% of guys problems is FEAR!
Most of you are not winning because most of you are not playing!
Stop with all of these crazy excuses of whyt you are not scoring, get over your insecurity and fears and the sky will open up!
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Re: NO GUTS NO GLORY!!!
-Really vague/basic/irrelevant advice
-Paraphrase from the bible
-Advice when they're not asked for it
To (try and) answer your question Shezz - I think the reason why American chicks are more easy going is because England is very much an individualist society, whereas America is more communal. In England people are so wrapped up in their own lives, that they have little time for others. We're also incrediably racist as we're a multi-cultural country. And as England is so much smaller than the US - this has a huge impact. This sense of ethnic competition further drives home the message of individualism the British Media adores.
England: "Sexy and Single"
America: "All together now".
Our humour is also different. There's a much higher emphasis on sarcasm and dark humour.
You notice how KBDJ's always give:
-Really vague/basic/irrelevant advice
-Paraphrase from the bible
-Advice when they're not asked for it
To (try and) answer your question Shezz - I think the reason why American chicks are more easy going is because England is very much an individualist society, whereas America is more communal. In England people are so wrapped up in their own lives, that they have little time for others. We're also incrediably racist as we're a multi-cultural country. And as England is so much smaller than the US - this has a huge impact. This sense of ethnic competition further drives home the message of individualism the British Media adores.
England: "Sexy and Single"
America: "All together now".
Our humour is also different. There's a much higher emphasis on sarcasm and dark humour.
MasterYoda
Don Juan
ITS ALL ABOUT WHERE YOU GO
Chicks from Northern England are much more nicer than the ones from the south of england.
If you go to places like Manchester, liverpool, Leeds etc etc They are sexy and smart and soooo ****ing friendly
If you go to places like London or slough then forget it.
There is an old saying
"People from the north are the salt of the earth"
I remember going to Manchester with some mates and we had gotten lost. So this lady walked up to our car and asked in the sexist Mancunian accent "Are you lost love?" Now people don't do that in london cuz they will think your weird.
Also one time in manchester I started a conversation easily with this chick oon the bus. It was like magic. And she wasn't phased by the colour of my skin either (Since I have brown skin). Now try that in London and there is a good chance you'll get a slap or a dark look.
Anyway thats my opinion.
Chicks from Northern England are much more nicer than the ones from the south of england.
If you go to places like Manchester, liverpool, Leeds etc etc They are sexy and smart and soooo ****ing friendly
If you go to places like London or slough then forget it.
There is an old saying
"People from the north are the salt of the earth"
I remember going to Manchester with some mates and we had gotten lost. So this lady walked up to our car and asked in the sexist Mancunian accent "Are you lost love?" Now people don't do that in london cuz they will think your weird.
Also one time in manchester I started a conversation easily with this chick oon the bus. It was like magic. And she wasn't phased by the colour of my skin either (Since I have brown skin). Now try that in London and there is a good chance you'll get a slap or a dark look.
Anyway thats my opinion.
MasterYoda
Don Juan
Re: Re: NO GUTS NO GLORY!!!
Sorry I have to disagree here. I don't want to digress to far from the subject. We are no where near as bad a racist society as in the US. I'm not trying to be overly critical here but as big as the US is the haven't made any major attempts to eridicate racism as here in the UK. I believe they have even passed law that prevents the use of racist slang such as the "n" word. Any one who does could face a fine or imprisonment. This law has been there since 2001 I think.
Kalel21
Don Juan
I live in the UK and I can go up to women pretty easily. Its not hard just take a deeeep breate and realise she is human like you and she isn't that special.
I agree though that people from the NJorth are quite friendly compared to other big towns e.g. Reading and London.
I agree though that people from the NJorth are quite friendly compared to other big towns e.g. Reading and London.
Think it’s a community thing, or lack of. I live in Chester and the people here talk enough if your part of the same community (sometimes). The community could be in a club, pub, village etc. It’s just basically assumed that you don’t talk to strangers and people don’t like to step outside social normality. Been working down on the Thames (on a boat) a fair bit recently too, and every boat that goes by will have someone on it waving at me, same as in my little village. Don’t think it’s so much a north south thing.
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"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
i agree on this, it is a general thing that randomly approaching people on the street is kinda odd, people are unexpected and probably think your weird.
I am from the south near london and yes people are more guarded bcause of crime in cities, also i went on a school trip and some onld guy in this village we were staying in said hi, goodmorning and we were like, THAT NEVER HAPPENS WHERE WE ARE. I try to initiate eye contact and they never look up or just power stare past you....
its like u dont wanna be that guy just staring at the girl, but u never get the chance to get eye contact/smile at them cuz they just dont look.
and yes they tend to open on on the weekends in clubs, but then u cant really get a relationship from a drunk person in a club who wont remember wtf u are.
I am from the south near london and yes people are more guarded bcause of crime in cities, also i went on a school trip and some onld guy in this village we were staying in said hi, goodmorning and we were like, THAT NEVER HAPPENS WHERE WE ARE. I try to initiate eye contact and they never look up or just power stare past you....
its like u dont wanna be that guy just staring at the girl, but u never get the chance to get eye contact/smile at them cuz they just dont look.
and yes they tend to open on on the weekends in clubs, but then u cant really get a relationship from a drunk person in a club who wont remember wtf u are.
ianlove
Don Juan
this is what i meant with my culture thread i posted recently.
Depending on where you live you have a different variety of women.
It IS all because of social programming, we ARE all the same genetically, its just when i woman is attracted to a guy it may be frowned upon in a certain country
Depending on where you live you have a different variety of women.
It IS all because of social programming, we ARE all the same genetically, its just when i woman is attracted to a guy it may be frowned upon in a certain country
If it was socially acceptable for men to approach women in the street a hot chick wouldn't be able to go to the store without a hundred men casually starting a conversation.
They have to keep their defences up, and personally I do not want to hassle 95 women for the 5 that might be interested.
Having said that it is a shame whenever two mutually attraced people pass in the street and society's conventions stop them from acting on their natural instincts. In a small town you'll probably see them again, in a big city probably never.
They have to keep their defences up, and personally I do not want to hassle 95 women for the 5 that might be interested.
Having said that it is a shame whenever two mutually attraced people pass in the street and society's conventions stop them from acting on their natural instincts. In a small town you'll probably see them again, in a big city probably never.
Ok, in this instance I (mostly) agree with societt's convention that single women walking down the street do not want to be approached by every would-be PUA.
But I agree with the gist of the thread - that people should be friendlier and less suspicious. I blame the fear-mongering media and politicians also.
But I agree with the gist of the thread - that people should be friendlier and less suspicious. I blame the fear-mongering media and politicians also.
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.