The thing I struggle with the most.

[RazorAzoth]

It's inevitable when you first start off approaching and dating you're going to make mistakes, look awkward, creep the girl out, look stupid, etc. You learn from your mistakes and gain experience. However, the thing I struggle with is knowing that the girl will tell everyone. People talk about people, everybody does it. If you do something incredibly stupid when you approach a girl and look like a complete douche, she's going to tell someone about it. Then that person tells someone. People like to gossip. I've heard stories about people and I then get upset because I dread to think about what people say about me.

How do you get past this? I could see if you live in a big ass city with 100,000 people but a lot of people here are like me and live in small town with like 20,000 people.

Also, is there an updated version of the DJ Bible? I just got done reading it and it's amazing, but really stops at the dating part and doesn't explain getting the chick back to your house and good sex techniques and tips and stuff. I have the .PDF version of the Bible and in 277 pages, doesn't contain this information.

 

[Effington]

God knows we've all said some bad lines, I know that I've had them thrown back at me through the grapevine a couple times. I've also said things I regretted after several drinks.

The best thing to do is just laugh with them. It's not that big of a deal, and the fact that they're talking to you about it is likely a test. The worst thing you can do (or at least, one of the worst) is to get nervous and insecure, because you'll probably just say something else stupid. Been there, done that.

I've blamed alcohol before but it just felt kind of cheap and lame, most people can see through that. All drinking does is bring out a dosage of brutal, honest truth, and spares no feelings.

As is the answer for pretty much any question posed on this board, just handle like you think a confident, secure person would.

 

[BlakeW5]

Laugh it off. There's no such thing as bad publicity. I'd rather have people bad-mouth me than be nonexistent or an afterthought.

People may gossip, but most people know not to believe the gossip 100% too.

If it really, really, really does bother you though, just go somewhere where no one knows you. Use this place to practice, and then put your new, improved skills to the test back home. It's a little extreme, but it's the only real option if you can't get over your fear IMO

 

[RazorAzoth]

I'd rather have people bad-mouth me than be nonexistent or an afterthought.

That's an interesting way to think about it. I never thought of it that way. I still have remnants of social anxiety left...which is basically worrying WAY too much of what people think of me. I've been trying EFT(http://emofree.com) to try and get over this without medication. I'm not as bad as I use to be though.

Also, anyone know about the DJ bible question?

 

[Warrior74]

If you can't deal with that...how are you gonna deal with chic gossip. You know they tell each other everything...if you have a small dyck, if you came to quick, if your pits stank. So what! gonna live your life in fear? Your a man dammit! Man up and stop being afraid. As long as you are real with yourself who cares what they say.

 

[GoodButNotGreat]

good post from DonS.

yea, since ive decided to become a pua/don juan ive realized that many things are indeed fcuked up in the dating/attracting world. just like how the subject of death is scary/hard to accept, it is one thing that will happen no matter what. you will get talked about, and nothing you can change it, unless you NEVER wnat to have a girl and be locked up in a room till ya die...

ive had HORRIBLE things happen that are embarrasing, like throwing up @ a girls house on her couch ruining it...BUt, Ive realized that it doesnt matter, i am who i am...and I WANT TO GET WITH HOT WOMEN, so i am OK with embarrasment/bad talk...because if it gets me the pvssy, then I NEED TO ACCEPT IT!

 

[RazorAzoth]

Thanks guys, I'm definitely trying to accept this and not care about it.

 

[Aragon034]

there's no such thing as bad publicity.

be it scoring a hot chick, or winning a chocolate milk chugging contest (and then spending the next 4 hours rolling around on the floor in lactose shock... ironically i met my best friend in this state) it'll still get your name out there.

 

[Lord Shinra]

"Life isnt as sweet without the sour"

 

[Snow Plowman]

One thing people really forget is that you can always change a chicks mood...I recently read a well known insturctor spent 6 hours plowing just to hook a set and ended up having sex with her...

From my personal experience, most of these chicks won't even remember you whether it goes good or bad...I've opened a super model 3 times...1st time blownout, 2nd time we chatted until she realized I approached her before, 3rd time she forgot who I was...

You shouldn't take anything personal, because these chicks don't even know you...