Spirit Fingers
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 6, 2005
- Messages
- 159
- Reaction score
- 4
This is a post from a special event on my blog called The Sex Blitz: Free Sex Advice for Men. The Sex Blitz is now a free newsletter that you can subscribe to for sex advice and advice on developing your inner game through sexual improvement.
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Originally posted on sexrevolutionblog.com
All of the PUAs I’ve met fall into two categories. Those who seduce for sex, and those who seduce for validation.
Those who seduce for validation are those who use pickup affirm to themselves that they are attractive guys, who really can get hot girls. They don’t care so much about sex, as about the actual triumph of getting to sex. In fact, they don’t even enjoy sex that much — they just enjoy the fact that they are having sex because it strokes their ego.
You can see this personality type in many of the characters in “The Game.” PUA s like Tyler Durden and Mystery, who devote their lives to seduction in order to fill a void of self-esteem inside them.
Now, I’m not saying that TD and Mystery actually practice validation driven pickup. I haven’t met either of them, and their portrayals in the book may be inaccurate. But, the way their characters are portrayed in the book give you good examples of what I am talking about.
There are two problems with validation driven pickup. The first is that by and large, it doesn’t work. You can see this in your local lairs — 95% of the guys are practicing validation driven pickup, and about the same percentage are not getting laid.
This is because girls want sex, and they will sniff out any guys who are not *really* sexual.
The second is that even if it does work, you can never pick up enough girls to make your insecurities go away. You just become addicted to the game – always needing the temporary fix of picking up another girl, but never finding a solution for long-term happiness. Despite all your apparent success, you haven’t eliminated your insecurities. You’ve just learned to mask them well. When nobody is around they still torment you and prevent you from being happy.
Again, you can see this in the characters in “The Game.” PUA s like Tyler Durden show this well – they are successful with women, but come off as robotic and soulless. And, despite all this success, it is readily apparent that they are not happy.
Mystery takes the example to an entirely new level. Despite all his ‘success’ with women, he became so depressed that he needed suicide counseling.
I’ve met lots of successful PUAs, and most of them aren’t happy. They’re caught in the addiction of validation driven pickup, and have only learned to mask their insecurities about their attractiveness rather than eliminate them. All their “self-improvement” work on making this area of their life better actually hasn’t improved their life at all. The only ones that have acheived real long-term satisfaction and happiness from the game are those who are seducing out of pure sexual desire.
Validation driven game is not the answer to your problems. Sex driven game is.
So without further ado, I present to you the Ten Commandments of Sex Driven Game
Part I: Realization
1. Realize that sexual desire does not equal desperation. Sexual desire for a woman is unambiguously attractive – this is why methods like Gunwitch Method are so successful, even though they are primitive. Desperation is when a woman senses that you want her validation, not when she senses that you want her *****.
2. Realize that chasing a woman’s validation by just getting her to like you is a trap, because you can never get enough of this type of validation to make yourself feel attractive in the long term. It is like any other drug, always requiring you to get a temporary fix but never offering long-term satisfaction.
3. Realize that the only real way to build inner game and make your insecurities about your attractiveness go away is through creating great sexual experiences. The only way to really believe you are the prize is to actually be the prize – to be the best lay she has ever had. This is the only long term solution that is effective.
4. Realize that women are inherently sexual, and the only real form of value to a woman is sexual value. Being entertaining, knowing NLP, knowing cool DHV stories, being intelligent, knowing multiple languages, having crossbow skills – this is all useless and devoid of value to a woman, just like it would be to you. It all comes down to your sexual presence – her subconscious perception of how good you are in bed. If you have this down she will be attracted to you, and will justify it by attributing to a laundry list of peripheral things. The point of all your value demonstrations should be to demonstrate that you have the traits of a guy who is good in bed.
5. Realize that if you are good in bed, your value is higher than that of even the hottest girl. If you give this high value away for free, she will be suspicious that it is “too good to be true,” and will doubt that your sexual value is real. Stop constantly trying to DHV, and start letting your woman work for your value.
Part II: Implementation
6. Stop pursuing one-night stands as a long-term goal. While they are better than nothing, they cannot build the inner game and sexual presence that long-term sexual relationships can. It is only in relationships that you can really develop your sexual skills, and thus your inner game and sexual presence (value). Make it a priority in your game to always have at least one long-term partner, and preferably 2-4.
7. Demonstrate value to a woman by demonstrating the traits of a man who is good in bed. These traits are: Dominance, Emotion, Variety, and Immersion. There are two elements to this: actually having those traits, and learning to convey them effectively.
8. Demonstrate attainability to a woman by being in a sexual state when you are around her. This state will eliminate any nervousness or awkwardness from the interaction, and will leave her free to feel sexual herself without looking desperate or slutty.
9. Get compliance with the knowledge that sex with you is the biggest reward you could ever give a woman. If you have this attitude, it is ludicrous that you will work hard for sex with a woman – why should you work hard, when you are the one giving the reward? Instead, structure opportunities for her to work with sex with you. Always make her work for sex, never the other way around.
10. Start on a program of sexual improvement today. As it is the best way of improving your inner game and the best way of building your value to women, sexual improvement cannot be neglected. Make sure that you are having lots of sex at all times, and are actively looking for ways to become better in bed.
---------------
If you liked this post, check out The Sex Blitz: Free Sex Advice for Men for more articles on sexual improvement and sex-driven game.
--------------------
Originally posted on sexrevolutionblog.com
All of the PUAs I’ve met fall into two categories. Those who seduce for sex, and those who seduce for validation.
Those who seduce for validation are those who use pickup affirm to themselves that they are attractive guys, who really can get hot girls. They don’t care so much about sex, as about the actual triumph of getting to sex. In fact, they don’t even enjoy sex that much — they just enjoy the fact that they are having sex because it strokes their ego.
You can see this personality type in many of the characters in “The Game.” PUA s like Tyler Durden and Mystery, who devote their lives to seduction in order to fill a void of self-esteem inside them.
Now, I’m not saying that TD and Mystery actually practice validation driven pickup. I haven’t met either of them, and their portrayals in the book may be inaccurate. But, the way their characters are portrayed in the book give you good examples of what I am talking about.
There are two problems with validation driven pickup. The first is that by and large, it doesn’t work. You can see this in your local lairs — 95% of the guys are practicing validation driven pickup, and about the same percentage are not getting laid.
This is because girls want sex, and they will sniff out any guys who are not *really* sexual.
The second is that even if it does work, you can never pick up enough girls to make your insecurities go away. You just become addicted to the game – always needing the temporary fix of picking up another girl, but never finding a solution for long-term happiness. Despite all your apparent success, you haven’t eliminated your insecurities. You’ve just learned to mask them well. When nobody is around they still torment you and prevent you from being happy.
Again, you can see this in the characters in “The Game.” PUA s like Tyler Durden show this well – they are successful with women, but come off as robotic and soulless. And, despite all this success, it is readily apparent that they are not happy.
Mystery takes the example to an entirely new level. Despite all his ‘success’ with women, he became so depressed that he needed suicide counseling.
I’ve met lots of successful PUAs, and most of them aren’t happy. They’re caught in the addiction of validation driven pickup, and have only learned to mask their insecurities about their attractiveness rather than eliminate them. All their “self-improvement” work on making this area of their life better actually hasn’t improved their life at all. The only ones that have acheived real long-term satisfaction and happiness from the game are those who are seducing out of pure sexual desire.
Validation driven game is not the answer to your problems. Sex driven game is.
So without further ado, I present to you the Ten Commandments of Sex Driven Game
Part I: Realization
1. Realize that sexual desire does not equal desperation. Sexual desire for a woman is unambiguously attractive – this is why methods like Gunwitch Method are so successful, even though they are primitive. Desperation is when a woman senses that you want her validation, not when she senses that you want her *****.
2. Realize that chasing a woman’s validation by just getting her to like you is a trap, because you can never get enough of this type of validation to make yourself feel attractive in the long term. It is like any other drug, always requiring you to get a temporary fix but never offering long-term satisfaction.
3. Realize that the only real way to build inner game and make your insecurities about your attractiveness go away is through creating great sexual experiences. The only way to really believe you are the prize is to actually be the prize – to be the best lay she has ever had. This is the only long term solution that is effective.
4. Realize that women are inherently sexual, and the only real form of value to a woman is sexual value. Being entertaining, knowing NLP, knowing cool DHV stories, being intelligent, knowing multiple languages, having crossbow skills – this is all useless and devoid of value to a woman, just like it would be to you. It all comes down to your sexual presence – her subconscious perception of how good you are in bed. If you have this down she will be attracted to you, and will justify it by attributing to a laundry list of peripheral things. The point of all your value demonstrations should be to demonstrate that you have the traits of a guy who is good in bed.
5. Realize that if you are good in bed, your value is higher than that of even the hottest girl. If you give this high value away for free, she will be suspicious that it is “too good to be true,” and will doubt that your sexual value is real. Stop constantly trying to DHV, and start letting your woman work for your value.
Part II: Implementation
6. Stop pursuing one-night stands as a long-term goal. While they are better than nothing, they cannot build the inner game and sexual presence that long-term sexual relationships can. It is only in relationships that you can really develop your sexual skills, and thus your inner game and sexual presence (value). Make it a priority in your game to always have at least one long-term partner, and preferably 2-4.
7. Demonstrate value to a woman by demonstrating the traits of a man who is good in bed. These traits are: Dominance, Emotion, Variety, and Immersion. There are two elements to this: actually having those traits, and learning to convey them effectively.
8. Demonstrate attainability to a woman by being in a sexual state when you are around her. This state will eliminate any nervousness or awkwardness from the interaction, and will leave her free to feel sexual herself without looking desperate or slutty.
9. Get compliance with the knowledge that sex with you is the biggest reward you could ever give a woman. If you have this attitude, it is ludicrous that you will work hard for sex with a woman – why should you work hard, when you are the one giving the reward? Instead, structure opportunities for her to work with sex with you. Always make her work for sex, never the other way around.
10. Start on a program of sexual improvement today. As it is the best way of improving your inner game and the best way of building your value to women, sexual improvement cannot be neglected. Make sure that you are having lots of sex at all times, and are actively looking for ways to become better in bed.
---------------
If you liked this post, check out The Sex Blitz: Free Sex Advice for Men for more articles on sexual improvement and sex-driven game.
