"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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The System: is kino anti-challenge?

viking22

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I've been reading a book called "The System" by Roy Valentine. The advice seems pretty sound and is along the lines of: look for eye contact, confirm interest by looking away and seeing if she picks up eye contact and smiles back, start a conversation, connect, then isolate.

The main piece of advice that kind of goes against the other stuff ive learnt on here is his advice to avoid touching or kissing the girl, until you had got her back to your place, as that confirmed to her that you wanted her so any challenge disappeared.

His idea I think is that if the girl is not sure whether you are interested or not, she will be more likely to go a lot further as a way of confirming to herself that she is desirable and you want her.

It sounds pretty good in practice, and there have been occasions where after Ive kissed the girl or touched her in a very obviously sexual way she has immediately lost interest having been very flirtatious beforehand. But at the same time ive read so many times on here that kino is essential for showing you are the man, a sexual being etc, as well as being a way of getting her comfortable and hot for you.

Any thoughts?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Jeffst1980

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Kino is important because it removes the physical "barrier" between you and the girl. This is key for triggering attraction.

Kino shouldn't be done in an overly sexual way, obviously. Start with casual touches on the arm as soon as you meet her--if you don't, it's going to seem odd to her that you're all of a sudden touchy-feely with her. To get to the point where she's ready to be kissed, she must feel comfortable holding your hand. You really can't bypass kino if you want to create genuine, gut-level attraction.

This is also why the phone, internet, etc. are a waste of time for anything other than setting up a meeting.
 

WC2

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Jeffst1980 said:
Kino is important because it removes the physical "barrier" between you and the girl. This is key for triggering attraction.

Kino shouldn't be done in an overly sexual way, obviously. Start with casual touches on the arm as soon as you meet her--if you don't, it's going to seem odd to her that you're all of a sudden touchy-feely with her. To get to the point where she's ready to be kissed, she must feel comfortable holding your hand. You really can't bypass kino if you want to create genuine, gut-level attraction.

This is also why the phone, internet, etc. are a waste of time for anything other than setting up a meeting.
:up:
 

AKA FLEX

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Being a challenge is more of an emotional thing, letting her know she's not getting into your head or your heart easily. Getting into your pants, however, is a physical thing, and I think most women know that will never be a challenge on their part.

Kino falls more under the physical category.
 
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