"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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the ship be sinking

kim jong chill

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There is a young lady I know who I met through a friend. We went on a coffee date in February, which went ok but nothing ever came of it in terms of a follow up. Basically, it was the "I'm too busy" excuse. I'll spare you the story but there's a thread I made back then describing the situation: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=192013&page=3

Last month I saw her in the library and figured what the hell, so I approached her. We had a brief chat, and I suggested getting together that weekend. Again she said she was busy. I simply said ok and went on my way. She texted me about an hour later, asking me to join her and her girlfriend for a drink that night. I was going out with a group of friends to the same bar anyway and we all wound up sitting together. There, we chatted occasionally (small talk) but she rejected my attempt at physical contact (hand). Last week I saw her again, when we went out for a mutual friend's birthday (same friend who tried to set us up at first). Again, small talk but she spent more time playing with her phone. When we do talk, it is always me who initiates the conversation. I haven't been needy - I don't call or text her. When we see each other, I keep the mood light, joke around, tease her in a friendly way. But she basically keeps the same polite but distant demeanor.

In short, things don't look good. But there is just something about this girl...This is not a "girl of my dreams" infatuation, nor have I stopped approaching other women during this whole time. But, simply put, I am very attracted to her.

Odds are that I will see her again at the beginning of August, as she is moving in with our mutual friend and they are planning on throwing a housewarming party. Is there anything that I can do in the time between to arouse her interest? Or are things too far beyond recovery at this point?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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bcolon

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In short, she isn't interested. Move on. Spin more plates. That's good YOUR attracted to her. But SHE isn't attracted to you. Find girls who are similar to her looks i.e. dress code, makeup, etc.

To many rejection cues in this situation.

Please move on. And find someone else.
 

Iceberg

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Some girls just don't want to date you, kim jong. No matter how hard you try.

Not to be mean, but how many rejections does it take to get the point across?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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