Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

The Seven Deadly Sins

tmpgstx

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Fear starts out as a small flame for some people and is later amplified into a towering Inferno! Instead of putting out the fire, they pour fuel on it by worrying and playing to their insecurities.

Fear is often the result of anxiety. Anxiety is often the result of bad past experiences. It takes courage and blind faith in getting through fear. Once conquered, a new sense of confidence takes ahold and things become easier and synergy is set in motion.
 
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Duke

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Fingers!!! I am crying tears of joy to see you back! i haven't even read your new post yet, but I definitely am! I'm just so fvcking happy to see you back. How's your musical career going man?
 

Duke

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As expected, excellent post, and I love how you identified what's wrong with the the inhabitants of this board AND suggested solutions to the myriad of problems that people are letting hold them back.

It became quite obvious to me, at least 6 months ago, that sosuave had become a cesspool of negativity and the battleground of keyboard warriors everywhere. It's great to see you back and infusing some no-frills, straight-to-the-point, bare-bones wisdom and truth that a lot of people have been wont to see or admit :box:

I personally got a lot out of this post as I've found myself in a few of those categories you bolded, and it was a definite wake-up call.

My hope is that the people who really need this post will read it and have an internal shift and BUILD MOMENTUM off of it by taking action, rather than just temporarily "feeling good" and then, a few hours later, "continue to work on their computer tan" (lmao :crackup: ).

Your posts have always inspired me to go beyond the archetypes... the PUAs or the AFCS or the Players... and to just be one of those rare, cool, confident, positive, together guys :cool: .

BEING that guy really is a lost art, as guys have forgotten who they are in the race to be whatever women want them to be, according to the latest and greatest internet seduction televangelist. Fvck that shyt! Long live real men.

This... is... SOSUAVE!
*hears the cheers of a thousand oppressed men who are vowing to free themselves from the 7 deadly sins Fingz posted by undertaking the solutions and actively applying them*
*kicks weak, wussy, self-pitying, procrastinating keyboard warriors into a bottomless pit and hears them screaming like the girl-boys they are on the way down*
 

Void

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Void comes out of the corner...

I decided to come out of the corner, I can't hide anymore. I'm battle-scarred and mangled like a third-world hooker. But that post, wow, I havn't seen that kind of truth hasn't been brought to the table on this website in a LONG time. That's what I've been thinking, and trying to put in words but couldn't.

What you said in your post has been said before, but everyone forgets and you presented in wonderfully.

Everyone has to deal with their problems head on, you can't run away from life forever. And fears that arn't physically endangering your life, are made up by you.

Because all fear really does is prevent you from achieving goals in your life.

Two sins that really spoke to me: addiction and self-pity.

*void drops various drugs*

Addiction I knew about, but not the side he presented on how to stop it.

Addiction is NOT limited to drugs, tv and the internet.

You can be addicted to anything.

You can be addicted to ideas, goals or anything that lets you escape from reality or could bring you happiness.

You can be addicted to losing weight, gaining muscle, masturbation, or trying to get girls.

You just have to realize (I) that to achieve a goal you can't be cutting corners, because in real life there isn't a hack or cheat to get what you want.

There's one route to the goal you want, and you may start farther than others but you still have to work for what you want.

And the worst thing ever is having regret, because your stuck in limbo thinking "what if" I had done this and that.

Maybe she would like me.
Maybe I wouldn't be such a mess up.
Maybe I would have the career I wanted.

My epiphany while reading your post, Senor, was the most fulfilling and best way to go about living is to do the things you feel you should do.

Not wants, but those ideas you have where you say "I should..."

"I should go talk to her."
"I should stop my addiction..."
"I should go persue my dream of...."
 

Señor Fingers

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Thanks for the warm welcome back yall. It really has been ages.. I was wondering how many of my old school Dons were still holdin it down..good to see familiar faces.

Duke said:
How's your musical career going man?
It was going swimmingly, till my hard drive crashed and I lost my last 6 songs..DOH!! Note to everyone here: If you haven't backed up your important files in over a month do it now!

Duke said:
My hope is that the people who really need this post will read it and have an internal shift and BUILD MOMENTUM off of it by taking action, rather than just temporarily "feeling good" and then, a few hours later, "continue to work on their computer tan" (lmao :crackup: ).
You just hit on another major problem. Sosuave can be like a feelgood drug... the excitement that you experience here (which was meant to push you to act) can almost become all the stimulus you need.

Duke said:
BEING that guy really is a lost art, as guys have forgotten who they are in the race to be whatever women want them to be
Very much on point there, Duke. I have another post dealing with exactly this subject matter so stay tuned!

Void said:
I'm battle-scarred and mangled like a third-world hooker.
LOL...ouch!

Void said:
Addiction is NOT limited to drugs, tv and the internet.

You can be addicted to anything...ideas, goals or anything that lets you escape from reality or could bring you happiness.
Very good point, and one that's easy to forget when you are doing something productive. Workaholics are a perfect example of this.. I know because if I have any addiction, this would be it. I often have a rough time just chilling out and leaving my work out of mind.

Void said:
You just have to realize (I) that to achieve a goal you can't be cutting corners, because in real life there isn't a hack or cheat to get what you want.
Okay this is getting spooky... you also just touched on something that I wrote in my next post. I need to hurry up and finish this beast!
 

Void

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da dynamically said:
All escape is an ego mechanism to get away from the moment of Now. Escape to the future, escape to the past, escape to an alternate reality. The only thing that exists is right here, right now. The ego needs "time" to survive. But stay in this moment and you will start being yourself again. All addictions and troubles arise from a lack of presence in the moment. If no one is home, then your body and mind is vulnerable to manipulation from the media. Most failed pickup attempts also arise from a lack of presence in the moment.
Yes, yes and yes. Right on. The way I've always thought of being a man, regardless of one's interests or occupation is their character that says:

I know what I want, and I'm going to try to get it.
 

Holland

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Da dynamicly,
I like what you're saying.
You happen to be familiar with Eckhart Tolles 'Power of Now'?
It's exactly about the stuff you're talking about.

@Void

Exactly, there is no such thing as something for nothing. You have to be willing to do all the little things in order to achieve greatly. And then, other people notice the great things you've accomplished and say: "Ow wow, you sure are lucky."

It happened to me some time ago. It was about 2-3 months after I got together with my current GF and things were going really well.
One of my buddy's had a lot of problems with a some weird chick, basicly because he's waaaaay to needy and clingy.
So he said to me: "**** man, why can't I just get a girl as easily like you do?"
I was insulted to say the least. After 1,5 year of hard studying the mating sequence, trying things, pushing and changing myself and making shiit happen this dude starts telling me that I'm 'just lucky and things came to me very easily???
I told him: "Hey look man: IT DID NOT COME EASILY TO ME. I took the time to learn and made it happen, so stop *****ing and start learning."

Off course, he did not like that. And he went about acting all like a needy fool and lost the girl and ending up heartbroken for a week or two (because of a girl which he got into a relationship with instantly and lasted for about a month.)

Just a classic example about how people only see the good results of other people and then conclude that they we're lucky/gifted/talented/other BS.
They fail to notice all the small things that contributed and added up to the succes. And if you make a suggestion to try something small they'll say:
- "Huh, that's pathetic" or
- "Ow, no, I don't need that kind of stuff, that is for losers" or
- "Something small like that won't make a difference."

And that's because they only think in the short term. Indeed, if you start practicing eye-contact when you're an insecure nerd it won't land you a chick in your bed in the short-term. But if you're willing to continue on that path, take action and learn it will in the long-term.
The same applies for everything in life. And you can only take action in this moment. Not in the past, not tomorow. NO, you take action NOW!~

START LIVING, in all areas of your life.
 

Zerix

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I think I'm going to have to make it my duty to read this post daily. In fact, quiet a few posts in here actually.

Thank you Fingz :)

And big props on your WoMS ebook, was great.
 

Styles

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Señor Fingers said:
It's more than "just do it" at this stage of the game. The first time someone throws cards everywhere and sees that they don't get ahead they have two choices.

1. Learn from their mistakes and tweak their game accordingly
2. Whine about how the game is too hard and unfair.

Overall I can't disagree with your post. You made some good points and yes, it is wise to surround yourself with good people who will give you love and support. But not all of us were granted that luxury and the point I am trying to drive home is that these influences can easily become crutches to one's development.

Case in point:

I grew up in a tough neighborhood in Brooklyn. Half of my childhood friends are either dead or in jail, most of the rest never really did anything with their lives and still reside in that neighborhood. A couple of years ago a ran into a few of these folks and we went out for drinks. At first I was happy to chill with them but that was short-lived.

We ended up going out to a local bar and once they had a few drinks in them, I had to endure the endless whining of people who never took a lick of responsibility for their lives. These fools blamed everything for their problems and at first I tried to ignore it, but then they started pulling the race card, like being ethnic was a handicap and the Man wouldn't let them get ahead. Feeling a little tipsy myself, I had to scream on them.

Here we were, a group of young latino fellas, all from the same hood, no-father-having bastard childs with welfare moms... statistically they were right. Society wouldn't give us an ice-cube's chance in hell. But how does that explain my success? What about the other handful of people who did escape the hood and do something with their lives? What made us different?

The difference is that we never used our handicaps as excuses. We looked at the obstacles in front of us and only saw hurdles we had to hop over, and it made us stronger. Most heads just sat on the sidelines, forgetting that they had all the power they needed to jump for themselves. Their main problem is that they have simply accepted their own suffering. Why? Because it's familiar... it's comfortable.. these dudes do not want to grow up and take life by the balls because, ironically enough, they fear success and the changes it will bring.

That my friends, is not manhood. It is unadulterated chumpery in its purest form.

I see this attitude a lot on this forum. So-called DJs post on and on about how messed up their upbringin was, or how they were treated unfairly..how society is brainwashing them with feminist and gay media, making us all less of men. I won't sit here and deny that a lot of these things are true. We live in a fukked up, complicated world and when you grow up you really see how unfair life is. Sometimes you will get dealt a sh!tty hand.

But so fukking what?

When all is said and done, who is really responsible for how you handle your life and the challenges it brings? Is it bad luck? Is it the Mommy who never gave you hugs? The kids who made fun of you in grade school? Nah man... it falls squarely on YOUR shoulders as a man to take whatever hand you are dealt and play it to the end. Even if the odds are against you, there is a great power that comes from knowing you gave something your all. nobody can take that away from you.

Life has taught me that we are not victims of the tides of fortune, but masters of our own destinies... every one of us. A shame so few ever realize it.
Thanks!

You are a little farther down the road then I am. I am just at the tip of the iceberg of this thing and realizing my dreams and rising above my circumstances, being a life pimp, etc. I am presently breaking off my support systems, and alot of people are sad to see me go, maybe because they liked being a crutch...but that is a whole different story. It's good to see somebody down the same road I'm traveling with a similar situation as me looking back and showing what can happen when you put your mind to it.

And you do music too? WTF!
 

Void

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Styles said:
Thanks!

And you do music too? WTF!
fvck guys, stop saying you guys do music. i ACTUALLY do and it makes me scared that im so similar
 

Señor Fingers

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Void said:
fvck guys, stop saying you guys do music. i ACTUALLY do and it makes me scared that im so similar
With all the free software out there (and availability for hacks on paid software) Audio producers are a dime a dozen these days. It's been a tough one for me because I grew up in a culture where DJs and producers were well respected and talented

You had to be because having your own studio setup required a lot of overhead and some serious dedication. Since this barrier has vanished, we are seeing a record number of artists and record labels popping up all over the place like fungus.

In principle i think it's cool, but in practice it has been a real bummer. There is so much mediocre music out there these days I dont enjoy record shopping like I used to. To make matters worse it seems like everyone and their little brother is a DJ and I don't get the same respect I was did as a professional.

Will that stop me? Naw...this sh!t is way to fun! I don't know what I'd do without my music.
 

LovelyLady

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Just want to share Ghandi's Seven Deadly Sins:

Wealth without Work
Pleasure without Conscience
Science without Humanity
Knowledge without Character
Politics without Principle
Commerce without Morality
Worship without Sacrifice
 

Void

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Señor Fingers said:
With all the free software out there (and availability for hacks on paid software) Audio producers are a dime a dozen these days. It's been a tough one for me because I grew up in a culture where DJs and producers were well respected and talented

You had to be because having your own studio setup required a lot of overhead and some serious dedication. Since this barrier has vanished, we are seeing a record number of artists and record labels popping up all over the place like fungus.

In principle i think it's cool, but in practice it has been a real bummer. There is so much mediocre music out there these days I dont enjoy record shopping like I used to. To make matters worse it seems like everyone and their little brother is a DJ and I don't get the same respect I was did as a professional.

Will that stop me? Naw...this sh!t is way to fun! I don't know what I'd do without my music.

Oh your an audio producer? That's interesting.

I completely agree with you on the mediocre music these days...

The level at which musicians now play their instruments in the business is well, really low.

Why would they have to learn their instruments? All the pop bands use Pro Tools.

I just hope these people realize that if they want to keep music human and still have concerts they can't have a computer do all the work.

For people like me and you :) :)

and uh all the musicians on sosuave hahah

And think about it just like in the thread how we discussed sneaking around/ avoiding the real work, you don't really achieve what you want to. Just like in music, if you write songs wishing to share them, these computer rockstars can't go on tour.

:D
 

Void

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double post ---delete this
 

Styles

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I'm not a producer, I am a singer/songwriter/arranger/composer

I play acoustic piano and keyboards, drums, and I want to learn a little guitar too

I know chord charts and sheet music

Been playing piano since I was knee-high, been taken classical lessons for 6 years, I know how to play blues and jazz, so pop is no problem. I have several awards for composition and performance, been in festivals, recitals, concerts. I can transcribe any song(that means hear it and write down a chart, go to a piano and play and sing the song)

I've composed the background music for a play, which is another practical use of music that you probably have never thought of

I have a 4 octave range as a singer, although you might as well say three because guys usually don't get but so high anyway, I've sang in a gospel choir, school groups, quartets

I'm also a rapper, I take rapping seriously, I have never lost a battle in my life. I can honestly say I am a better rapper than 60% of the rappers you hear on the radio. It would take some Eminem freestyling dude straight outta Queens to rip me, seriously. I'm no joke with a pen and a pad. Rapping is a legitimate vocal art.

I've performed in theatres, clubs, coffee houses, churches, and my next goal is the arena.
-------

I am transferring to a 4 year college where I will continue training under some of the best singers(they have jazz vocals there, so pop vocals will be like ABCs compared to that ****) and best classical and jazz pianists in the world.

Right now I am so busy, I simply stay in the groove musically by being a session musician and going to lessons when I find time. I have worked with 4 producers with their own real studios. REAL STUDIOS. The kinds you DRIVE TO. I have NEVER TOUCHED ProTools in my life. I'd rather do music without it personally. The college that I am transferring to has an IN HOUSE RECORD LABEL, so I will be releasing EPs and perhaps an LP in less than 4 years. I am only 20, so I have lots of time in the industry.

So yeah, I don't "do music", music is my life and blood and my passion, and my #1 woman catcher. I don't even talk or even sing sometimes I just play piano and all the work is done for me...***** shields, LJBF, simple disinterest have all been crushed...I don't even care what a woman thinks unless she is a special woman, and those only come around so often....

Fingers said it himself, make whatever you do art...Just another of good advice falling on deaf ears

My **** is so deep, I could just bang my head on a keyboard and people would burst into a standing ovation.

So yeah, I know maybe a few things about women, again this is just the internet here guys
but attracting women is no problem, its as simple as get a life problem solved...if you can't maintain a good smell, a haircut, a shave, and semi-white teeth then damn....

But please don't ever ever ever ever ever disrespect music by saying you simply "do music" because music is MY LIFE. Really...don't. I'm not even saying this like I am sitting in my basement with some speakers, a keyboard, and a mixing board and a computer, I am talking professional musician. PROFESSIONAL.

REAL ACTION AND PROOF VS. INTERNET FAME

Take your pick
 
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