I don't know if this is the right place to post this, but I can't figure out how to contact Rollo directly so here it is.
Let me start by saying that I'm a huge fan of RM and have subscribed to the blog for over a year, which is exactly the reason I need to point this out. Rollo has always had an impressive grasp on this stuff and a knack for explaining it to those of us who are still unplugging, and his book has the potential to spread red pill knowledge to a whole new audience - if done correctly.
With that said, I have two critiques:
1. There are editing problems with in this book that are so flagrant that they pose a serious risk to the credibility of the content. I guess we are a little more lenient when reading a blog, but when it comes to the printed word, people expect a level of quality and if it doesn't get delivered they won't take the writing seriously. Here are examples I found in the first ten minutes of reading:
-Misspelling: Introduction ii "bringing" is printed as "brining" ; pg 3 "there may be no ONE" is printed as "there maybe no ONE"
-Incorrect use of apostrophes: Introduction iii "sons of Jaquie's" should be "sons of Jaquies" ; pg 7 "that of my family's" should be "that of my family"
-Incorrect capitalization: pg 6 "Hypergamy" and pg 7 "Build a better Beta" (these work as hyperlinks in a blog post, but on a plain page they just look like bad writing)
-Half a page of text is repeated on page 7 and 8
2. The book, according to the introduction, is supposed to be geared toward beta/plugged in/blue pill readers, yet it is steeped in manosphere terminology. There is some awareness of this - Rollo mentions that he's going to use some jargon and define it as he goes, but that doesn't really happen. He defines some abbreviations like LTR, but assumes we know what he's talking about when he says things "alpha," "beta," "hypergamy," "red pill."
To guys like us who have been discussing these things for years, these terms seem trivial - and yes, a newbie could simply google "hypergamy" and get a dictionary definition, but if this book is really going to be a foundational intro to red pill knowledge, these terms need to be laid out with simplicity so that the reader gets both the dictionary meaning and the contextual or colloquial meaning that the terms have acquired in the manosphere.
Rollo, I want to see this book make some waves, and I want to loan it to my blue pill friends and start some real dialogue, but you can do better than this. If you don't have time to do it yourself, then collaborate with me or other copy editors on the forum (there's got to be at least a few) and let's give this book the presentation it deserves.
Let me start by saying that I'm a huge fan of RM and have subscribed to the blog for over a year, which is exactly the reason I need to point this out. Rollo has always had an impressive grasp on this stuff and a knack for explaining it to those of us who are still unplugging, and his book has the potential to spread red pill knowledge to a whole new audience - if done correctly.
With that said, I have two critiques:
1. There are editing problems with in this book that are so flagrant that they pose a serious risk to the credibility of the content. I guess we are a little more lenient when reading a blog, but when it comes to the printed word, people expect a level of quality and if it doesn't get delivered they won't take the writing seriously. Here are examples I found in the first ten minutes of reading:
-Misspelling: Introduction ii "bringing" is printed as "brining" ; pg 3 "there may be no ONE" is printed as "there maybe no ONE"
-Incorrect use of apostrophes: Introduction iii "sons of Jaquie's" should be "sons of Jaquies" ; pg 7 "that of my family's" should be "that of my family"
-Incorrect capitalization: pg 6 "Hypergamy" and pg 7 "Build a better Beta" (these work as hyperlinks in a blog post, but on a plain page they just look like bad writing)
-Half a page of text is repeated on page 7 and 8
2. The book, according to the introduction, is supposed to be geared toward beta/plugged in/blue pill readers, yet it is steeped in manosphere terminology. There is some awareness of this - Rollo mentions that he's going to use some jargon and define it as he goes, but that doesn't really happen. He defines some abbreviations like LTR, but assumes we know what he's talking about when he says things "alpha," "beta," "hypergamy," "red pill."
To guys like us who have been discussing these things for years, these terms seem trivial - and yes, a newbie could simply google "hypergamy" and get a dictionary definition, but if this book is really going to be a foundational intro to red pill knowledge, these terms need to be laid out with simplicity so that the reader gets both the dictionary meaning and the contextual or colloquial meaning that the terms have acquired in the manosphere.
Rollo, I want to see this book make some waves, and I want to loan it to my blue pill friends and start some real dialogue, but you can do better than this. If you don't have time to do it yourself, then collaborate with me or other copy editors on the forum (there's got to be at least a few) and let's give this book the presentation it deserves.
