The Psychology of the First Kiss and the Bytch test, READ!!!

[Pugsley_f5]

Hey fellas, If any of you have been keeping up with the "7 dates to the inner Bytch " thread as well as my "100 approach journal" particularly my last post talking about a recent date I had and the kiss close......well guys I prolly had one of the most enlightening advice given to me from the most unlikely place on the other side of the fence.....MY EX and everything that she said which lines up perfectly with what has always been said on here, ill post the entire convo and break it down for you all where needed, aslo read those two posts mentioned above itll give you more know how of what I am refferring to in these convos.....otherwise youll be lost.....in this convo



(Just fluff talk mainly)

turbopugsleyLX: I need ur help

delirious: with?

turbopugsleyLX: analysation

delirious: how bout we start with spelling?

delirious: lol

turbopugsleyLX: i know ur proll not the best subject to ask , but ur the only girl I know

turbopugsleyLX: that i can aks

turbopugsleyLX: ask

delirious: i'm the only girl you know? ok, thats a lie

turbopugsleyLX: ****

delirious: alright, well hit me.

turbopugsleyLX: im about to post on soo suave u can read it on my journal

delirious: and what do you need me for then?

turbopugsleyLX: its about a date I had I need analysation (i know spelling)

turbopugsleyLX: from a girls perspective

delirious: okee dokee

urbopugsleyLX: itll be posted in about 5 mins

delirious: well i am curious. did it go well or poorly?

turbopugsleyLX: very well

turbopugsleyLX: just i did one thing that has made me very inecure

delirious: k then what do you want?

delirious: whats that?

turbopugsleyLX: its in the post

delirious: tell her you love her or could fall in love with her?

turbopugsleyLX: lol no not that bad

turbopugsleyLX: Im prolly just being overanalytical

delirious: k good, cause i couldnt get you thru that one.

turbopugsleyLX: lol

turbopugsleyLX: emotional guillatine (sp)?

delirious: saying that? yeah pretty much

turbopugsleyLX: yeh I know....

delirious: i'll tell you what...

turbopugsleyLX: you wont be mad though reading the post will you in a jealous type of way

turbopugsleyLX: ?

delirious: be chill, play your cards close to your chest.

delirious: not at all.

turbopugsleyLX: k

delirious: play your cards close to your chest and even when she pours her heart out, be nice, but dont reciprocate.

turbopugsleyLX: let me finish typing it, the last bit I need to type has nothing to do with the date but I need to put it all in one post

delirious: grrr. i dont have time to wait.

turbopugsleyLX: k well itll be 5 mins

turbopugsleyLX: the post is up

delirious: i know, im reading it.

delirious: k

turbopugsleyLX: k

delirious: you're prolly gonna get a lot of "wait it out" kinds of responses from the DJs, cause they are all about playin the game.

delirious: but i know you, and i know you dont care about getting ass.

delirious: and ultimately, you ARE looking for a gf, correct?

delirious: yes/no/i just want *****/i just want tons of women?

turbopugsleyLX: Im not necessarily looking for a gf, but if something worth my time comes along I would get into a
relationship

delirious: k then what are you looking for? girls to go on dates with?

turbopugsleyLX: yeh but dates are mainly just a filter to see if she is worth the time for a STR or LTR

turbopugsleyLX: so I geuss then you sould say i am going
through the filter process for a STR LTR

delirious: exactly what i just said, but ok.

delirious: anyways, you need to at least call her and tell her you
had a great time, and you look forward to seeing her again, and then see how she responds.

delirious: if she agrees, suggest a date 3 or 4 days out.

turbopugsleyLX: so knowing she made the moves to setup the first date and I didnt even call her you would do that?

turbopugsleyLX: me make the move

delirious: yeah bc she is gonna start to think you dont like her, then she'll put her walls up

delirious: cause if she had to do the work the first time, she prolly wont go to the trouble of doing it again, she'll figure if you want it, you'll go for it. and if you dont, she'll move on

turbopugsleyLX: how long should I wait to call

delirious: AND, the deep and real conversations dont make you "friend" material.

delirious: when was the date?

delirious: if it was saturday, you should have called within 24 hours. call today.

GOOD INFO HERE!--------------------------------------------------------------

delirious: if you didnt call me within 24 hrs of the first date to say you had fun, then you arent interested.

delirious: in a girls mind anyway. thats the general rule of thumb. 24 hrs, NO MORE than 48 or you are out the door.

turbopugsleyLX: I dont want to come off as needy though

delirious: its not needy at all.

delirious: its called INTERESTED.

delirious: playin hard to get aint the way to go. maybe with expressing your feelings it is, but not with contact. trust me. just had this convo with a guy the other day.

(Good Point) ^

turbopugsleyLX: do you see anything there that could have been a negative buying sign on her part

delirious: no

delirious: but some girls really hate the ****y thing, so lay off that for a while

turbopugsleyLX: just knowing what I should or not have done with the last convo got me insecure and doubting

delirious: well dont worry about it

turbopugsleyLX: now heres the question......did anything you read about give you the LJBF from mine or her part

turbopugsleyLX: like she was putting me in the friends zone or if I gave off that vibe

turbopugsleyLX: ?

delirious: 1 sec

delirious: what does LJBF stand for?

turbopugsleyLX: Lets just be friends you know that infamous nice guy excuse line

delirious: i dont think so, but i mean, i dont know how she was touching you.

delirious: thats the telltale sign.

delirious: why no kiss? that could be a big indicator

turbopugsleyLX: I wanted to kiss close but I didnt want to be too pushy and as soon as the last convo was over the insecurity set in

delirious: but she didnt kiss you.

turbopugsleyLX: liked she touched my arm when she was saying something important

turbopugsleyLX: she playfully hit me when I teased

turbopugsleyLX: I put my arm around her shoulder walking out and she put her arem around my side

delirious: those arent definitive,could go either way i guess.

turbopugsleyLX: bets, not very many girsl will initiate a kiss close

turbopugsleyLX: they wait for the guy to..

delirious: no but they will say something that insinuates that they want to be kissed.

turbopugsleyLX: like what?

delirious: like, in a moment of silence "what are you thinking
about" when you know you're both thinkin about kissing. or joking around about getting a goodnight kiss, something like that

(Good point) ^

turbopugsleyLX: nah, we didnt even really talk about relationship stuff at all

delirious: that might not be a good thing

turbopugsleyLX: nothing along those lines so the convo didnt
even come within 1000miles of talking about kissing in any way

delirious: another reason you need to call her, cause she might
be getting the "friends" vibe from you

turbopugsleyLX: but if she did get the friends vibe and then I
showed interest in other ways and thats what she wanted
wuldnt that be a good thing

delirious: you need to call her. bottom line. "i had a great time,
looking forward to taking you out again, blah blah blah"

turbopugsleyLX: if she complies and wants to is it safe to say
that she is interested in "being more than friends

delirious: well most likely. but if you dont kiss on the second
date, you are just friends.

(Take notes on that one) ^

turbopugsleyLX: I always kiss on the second date if I dont get
any buysigns from her

turbopugsleyLX: cause I dont want to overstep the bounds

delirious: if you dont get buying signs?

delirious: what if you do?

turbopugsleyLX: then I do

delirious: and you do it ify ou dont as well?

turbopugsleyLX: like susan we playfully bet on the frist kiss,
sarah no buying signs, I Initiated it second date, you we had soo
much rapport that I could kiss on the first date

delirious: i dont get it. basically, you kiss on the 2nd date either
way?

turbopugsleyLX: if I do get buyinf signs "beyond a shadow of a
doubt stuff" then i will kiss close otherwise ill wait till the 2nd date

delirious: shannon, he kissed me on the second date bc we got in
a situation where we had to, more or less. anthony, it was
silence for a while, i asked hiim what he was thinking, he said he
wanted to kiss me, then he kissed me. brad, first date. and of
course, you and frankie first date.

delirious: but everyone else has been 1st date.

turbopugsleyLX: I know exactly how Im going to initaite the kiss
second date with her

delirious: how?

turbopugsleyLX: ask her "do you like suprises?"

turbopugsleyLX: and of course shell say yes then ill pull her to me
and pause and look at her then kiss

delirious: imo, i dont dig that.

delirious: but if it works for you, roll with it

turbopugsleyLX: lol why

delirious: i think its corney and planned.

delirious: dont plan it.

turbopugsleyLX: I like spontaneity though in my actions

turbopugsleyLX: I wont plan it, just at the right time ill spring it

delirious: wel like i said, ifyou like it, go with it.

delirious: its not my style, but im not your date.

turbopugsleyLX: whats a girls take on kissing?

delirious: what do you mean?

 

[Pugsley_f5]

CONTD






ABSOLUTLEY GOLDEN INFO FROM HERE ON!!!--------------



turbopugsleyLX: ur a girl what are girls ops on kissing like what
uve heard from freinds and stuff, do they like a first date kiss

delirious: of course. cause then they dont have to wonder
whether or not he is intothem.

delirious: and he doesnt kiss them, he isnt intothem, unless he
has made it known, like shannon did, that he doesnt kiss on the
first date

delirious: but you didnt do that.

turbopugsleyLX: u think most all girls hold that opinion

delirious: not a question in my mind.

delirious: im sure of it.

turbopugsleyLX: hmm learn something new everyday

delirious: and that post "7 dates til i found her inner *****" that is
gold. take that as gospel.

turbopugsleyLX: lol i havent read the entire thing whats it about?

ARE you Ready GUYS!!!!!_________________________________________
____________

HERE IT COMES!!


delirious: the ***** test. TRUER WORDS HAVE NEVER BEEN
SPOKEN. nip it in the bud and you've got your dream girl for life.

turbopugsleyLX: what u mean?

delirious: the first time a girl is *****y to you.

turbopugsleyLX: what happened?

delirious: just read the post, but especially player_supremes way
of dealing with it.

delirious: worked like GOLD on me when shannon did it

turbopugsleyLX: what did you do?

turbopugsleyLX: and what did he do

delirious: i didnt do anything, i just had an attitude one night.
nothing major, just not my normal bubbly self.

turbopugsleyLX: and what did he do

delirious: he said "look, to this point, i think you are amazing. but
you're being a *****, and i know it has nothing to do with me. if
something is wrong, be an adult and put it on the table without
*****ing, whining or complaing. or, if you are just testing me for
attention, cut the **** cause you wont get any. you get attention
when you are your cute, loveable self. if you want to continue to
act like a kid, i'm leaving and i'll see you tomorrow". i was
stunned, but totally appreciated his honesty. so i straighened
up, he NEVER mentioned it again, he treated me normally, and he
gives me all the attention i need, therefore i dont have to pull ****
to get it.

delirious: i mean, of course there was more to it than that, but
thats the jist.

delirious: but if he let me get away with it, and played the "whats
wrong baby?" game and tried to cheer me up, i'd be like "i win"
and i'd pull that **** everytime i wanted love.

turbopugsleyLX: hmmm Im going to post this convo on soo suave
this will help alot of guys

delirious: oh god, they'll think i'm insane.

delirious: dont put his name. bleep it out, k?

turbopugsleyLX: no, ill post it cause these questions get asked all
the time

turbopugsleyLX: why lol

delirious: just dont, thats weird.

POINT HERE bELOW READ!!!!! Take Notes


delirious: girls usually try that **** within a week or two, or 4 or 5
dates. usually cause they want to see the reaction.

turbopugsleyLX: I cannot remember the first time you got *****y
with me can u I asl cannot remember how I handled it

delirious: and its true what they say on there, PMS is not an
excuse. not even close, if you are a mature adult, you dont let it
control the words that come out of your mouth.

delirious: well it was obv online

turbopugsleyLX: I prolly handled it very afc though i imagine
knowing how I used to be

delirious: i dont rmember exactly when, but im sure you played
into it, cause i used it for the rest of our relationship

turbopugsleyLX: what u mean?

delirious: and even when you got stronger, you still responed to
my quiet, sad moods.

turbopugsleyLX: state ur opinion in full again not scatterbrained

delirious: huh? opinion on what?

turbopugsleyLX: state the last few things u said in a complete
thought not scatterbrained

delirious: idont remember the first time i gave you the ***** test,
but you obviously failed becaused i used it to get attention for
nearly 3 yeras and it always worked, either negative or positive.
and it doesnt matter if its negative or positive, cause the
negative always resulted in at least SOME attention, which i
rarely got from you, and then a makeup conversation, which
included hugging and kissing and i love yous... everything i was
after in the first place

delirious: and if you post my screen name on sosuave, i'll KILL
you.

delirious: i mean it.

turbopugsleyLX: lol ok

turbopugsleyLX: I wont

delirious: so does that help you out?

delirious: dont take the *****y **** for one second.

turbopugsleyLX: hey hold one sec

delirious: k

turbopugsleyLX: hmm

turbopugsleyLX: do you think that the convo was a little too deep
for the first date? and should have been kept lighter

delirious: yes

delirious: keep it centered on the two of you.

delirious: plenty of time for that other ****




MORE GOLDEN INFO HERE GUYS!!!!!!


turbopugsleyLX: yeh as ur were saying playersupreme hit it on
the head

turbopugsleyLX: hes a No BS type of guy

delirious: which is ultimately what every girl wants, unless she is
a dike or a control freak

delirious: both of which are no good anyway

turbopugsleyLX: yeh.....so if the ***** test comes up just shut it
down right there

delirious: shut it down HARDCORE, but then dont bring it up again
or else she will be embarrassed and pull away

turbopugsleyLX: what do you mean dont bring it up again

turbopugsleyLX: just resume talking

delirious: yeah, treat her normally, dont treat like less than you,
dont act all authoritative and superior, and be sure that you tell
her how wonderful she is, if you tihnk she is.

turbopugsleyLX: you know I never though I would say this.....but
thank you, you have really enlightened me and helped me with
something that will impact how things in the future go for me

delirious: what are you referring to?

delirious: this conversation?

turbopugsleyLX: this whole convo

turbopugsleyLX: it was enlightening

delirious: its true though

turbopugsleyLX: and it has really taught me from my mistakes
and made me looks back and know what needed to be changed

delirious: well, if you want to not have to deal with shutting it
down, then keep it from happening by giving enough attention.
girls are like dogs. reward good behavior. dont reward bad
behavior. attention is attention, whether it is good or bad.

delirious: give them attention and make sure they always know
they are special, dont leave them wondering, bc that is when
they start to pull **** to test you, to see if you care

turbopugsleyLX: are women conscious when they are *****
testing and do they purposfully ***** test, or do they just get
moody and they guy striaghtens them out?

delirious: well, they know they want attention, but the way in
which they try to get it may or may not be subconscious

turbopugsleyLX: well if he straightens them out they still dont get
attn.....

delirious: then game over. he should give them attention when
they are together.

turbopugsleyLX: what do u mean?

delirious: he needs to give them attention so they dont feel the
need to fight for it

delirious: with you, i had to act out to get it.

delirious: i tried that with my boyfriend now, and it didnt work.
now, if i feel like i need attention, i'll straightup say it. but
usually, he can tell, and he is gooda bout it, and then everything
is cool

turbopugsleyLX: well say if you tried to get attn by being *****y
with me and I straighten you out then what happens

delirious: you leave it at that, but be sure to give the girl lots of
attention

delirious: not neccesarliy when you arent out with her, but if you
arent with her, drop her an email, text message her, give a quick
2 second phone call to say you are thinking of her...stuff like
that. but thats only if she is a gf, not just a chick you are dating.
tho it helps with dates as wel.

turbopugsleyLX: yeh but even if she straightened out and all she
wants is attn, shell just throw a ***** test again

delirious: not if you shut her down.

delirious: and give her attention

delirious: if you leave your girl hanging and dont pay attnetion
toher, she'll try to get your attn any way she can, but eventually
she'll stop trying and bail.

 

[Pugsley_f5]

CONTD




turbopugsleyLX: yeh but all girls want is attn\

delirious: so?

delirious: i've made this very clear

turbopugsleyLX: I geuss is she was straightened out and she
trys other avenues when you think ur giving enough attn, then
shes prolly just an attn ***** and u need to move on

delirious: or you need to learn what kind of attention she wants.

turbopugsleyLX: you mean as is "the five love languages" attn?


(IM REFERRING TO THE BOOK "The Five Love Languages" if you havent read it you need to!!!!! It will save your relationships and make them last, I cannot understate this.....READ IT!!!!)




delirious: sorta, yeah

turbopugsleyLX: hmmm very enlightening

turbopugsleyLX: never though about that

delirious: but its true.

turbopugsleyLX: hmmm

turbopugsleyLX: she may not want listening type attn she may
want cuddling type attn

turbopugsleyLX: that type of stuff

delirious: or words of affirmation

turbopugsleyLX: yes that makes sense

turbopugsleyLX: well I never though I would be getting advice
from my ex on women...lol

delirious: the world is full of surprises

turbopugsleyLX: lol


turbopugsleyLX: well thanks for helping

turbopugsleyLX: im gonna prep this for post cause it will help
many many people

delirious: just dont get sucked in by charm.

turbopugsleyLX: what u mean?

delirious: dont get so ***** whipped cause she seems
so "perfect" that you are afriad to be strong causeyou dont want
to lose her

turbopugsleyLX: yeh true

turbopugsleyLX: ive seen that there is always a "bigger fish" out
there

delirious: no girl is that good. and she'd be all the better if you
cut the ****, ie, myself.

turbopugsleyLX: well I was pretty cut the **** at the end of our
realtionship, but in the beginniing the bad stuff had already been
done that set the tone for the rest of our relationship


delirious: and besides chris, i was gonna keep pulling that ****
cause you never gave me any attention.

delirious: and things got some much worse when we got into the
business, cause you have to balence your responsibilities in a
relationshiop with those of the business, and it was totally out of
balence

delirious: now, for me and my bf, things are smoother than butter
and moving quickly bc htere are no roadblocks and i am the true
betsy that God created me to be.


turbopugsleyLX: but u knew that they would be out of balance
devoting my time to my business

turbopugsleyLX: I told u this

delirious: but its gotta be balenced, even if the hours arent
baleneced, the effort has to be.

turbopugsleyLX: ok

turbopugsleyLX: let me prep this convo

turbopugsleyLX: I need to post it b4 I leave

turbopugsleyLX: from work



Well guys i hope that post helped you all as much as it did me its all the info you get on SSuave but from a Girls Psychological perspective and some of the info in here is albsolutley Golden , I hope everyone gets to read this post it will help their transformation in these areas 100 fold.....



Pugs

 

[Pugsley_f5]

Bump for everyone to see

 

[Adam See]

I do like this. And also your ex is a very down to earth girl.

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Adam See
I do like this. And also your ex is a very down to earth girl.

agreed.

and by the way, i skipped the first post entirely. WAY too long

 

[dearsappho]

A summary is needed as this is abit disjointed....

 

[RedKnight04]

A summary is needed as this is abit disjointed....

I AGREE

 

[Oxide]

very good stuff.. i always believed that being straightforward with a girl is the best way to go.. because if you start piling BS and excuses on top of each other you are just playing some b1tch game...


i remember my teacher telling us a story how he was with his girlfriend back in the day riding in a car.... she said "Oh, look, a pottery shop!" ... so he replied "Do you want to go in?" and she said "No, its ok"...

So then they ride for awhile, and he said "You can see, she is sitting there all quiet and looking like she is pi$$ed off.. but when you ask her what's wrong she says ... Nothing".

What would you do? ..........










I raised my hand and said "Take her to get the fukk out of my car is she is gonna act like a baby".

Guys, if you let a girl's emotions control you, she will always think she can pull a scene to get attnetions/things from you.. I see this in my mom, she used to do this sh1t every week.. and my step dad would fall for it....

In order for a relationship to work, neither team should be using strategies...

 

[RedKnight04]

I see this in my mom, she used to do this sh1t every week.. and my step dad would fall for it....

Funny you should say that Oxide, the same thing has been happening to my father for the last 30+ years they've been together. I even talked to my mother about this and she said "Thats the only way I can get him to notice what I'm saying." I was stunned.

 

[aolsuxs]

I thought it was...funny how you try to use Sosuave slang with her and then had to explain it, LJBF...kiss close etc. Wasn't one of the rules here not to share this site with girls you know?

 

[Fenderules]

yeah it kinds portrays you as kinda desperate 2. I dunno but wutever i know your not from your cold approaching so screw wut any chick thinks. If she's so conceded about becoming a better man then she can go **** some emo cause she ain't gonna get any from real men (us changing ourselves)



yeah your posts were long but it was worth it