The power of EMOTIONAL RELEVANCE

[speakeasy]

I don't know what guru I first heard the term "emotional relevance" but I realize that this is a major part of learning the game. You will NOT attract serious interest in a woman unless you are emotionally relevant to her. It is in this mindset that a girl starts thinking about you when you're not around. Or wishing you spent more time around her. Or being eager to call you up and tell you about something important in her day.

There is a woman that I like, but I'm stuck in the friends zone and I know I'm not emotionally relevant to her. That's fine, I've pretty much just accepted that nothing is likely to ever come between us so whatever, plenty of fish in the sea... Tonight, I ran across some postings she made on this dude's myspace page. The guy is as gay as the sky is blue so nothing is going on between them. But all her posts were full of "I love you, I miss you, I'm going to come over and spank you, can't wait to hang with you again... gagagaga..." Now I've known this girl long enough to know that she's not a faghag or anything and I know she wants a relationship with a nice straight guy. But my point is, I have never seen her act or talk like that to ANY guy, and this one gay guy somehow pushed emotional buttons in her that make her animated and excited, fun and emotional anytime he's in her presense. I don't know what it is that guy does, says or acts as I'm not around him, but he has somehow become emotionally relevant to this girl. I don't think the his gayness plays any role, he just happens to be gay, there's no chance of romance between them. I'm only talking about the state of mind he puts her in. If I had the ability to evoke in this girl in the same mindset, which I haven't yet figured out, she'd likely have been mine long ago.

DJs, what are examples of ways you've acted around women, things you've done that have put her in that mindset which I describe above? I need to get this part of my life handled as I think that's my sticking point. I need to start figuring out how this segment of the game works.:woo:

 

[socalrunner]

i would also like to know, thanks in advance to anyone who puts some thought into posting an interesting piece of advice for us.

 

[rockwoods]

read some advive by mystery about transition from let's just be friend phrase

 

[tmpgstx]

Alot of gay men can tap that 'emotional G-spot' with a woman by identifying with them. They'll rehash their feelings with them etc. To us guys, they are clearly gay as they are like women. Yet, some women can't see through that or don't want to. It's like another woman, yet with a dyck.

There is nothing like good 'ol raw masculinity, something most gay men can't provide. Get her emotional motor running with non-verbal male sexiness.

 

[speakeasy]

I have to wonder if the guy was straight would she be acting this way around him. Or is it that a gay man provides a certain level of "safety" for them. I was at a birthday party last year where this same gay guy was present. He was able to feel up on the girls while freaking them and they were loving it. I turned to one of my female friends he did this to and said, "you would NEVER let me do that", and she just laughed. I then told the gay guy, "I guess being gay has it's advantages with the ladies!" Then I remember in The Game where Style made a pickup on an HB by pretending he's gay initially, then turning straight later on.

But anyway, I'm trying to figure out what it is about flamboyant gay men that women just get all mushy and emotional for and want to be around these guys. Now I'm not going to walk around wearing skinny jeans and limping my wrist, but could there possibly be a lesson in here somewhere to be learned from gay dudes?

My only guess is that women already love the idea of being felt up by a guy, but don't like the fact that the guy actually wants that to lead to something. So maybe a gay man gives them the best of both worlds. A guy that's sensual with them, but they know he isn't into p*ssy so it's totally safe. I don't know, just a theory. I'm trying to figure this sh*t out.

 

[oranges]

"I guess being gay has it's advantages with the ladies!"

No, if hes gay, touching up a woman isn't going to do anything for him.

 

[speakeasy]

No, if hes gay, touching up a woman isn't going to do anything for him.

Well I think he enjoyed it quite a bit from what I could see, though I'm sure he'd have preferred it was a guy he was freaking. He just was having a good time out there on the dance floor and the girls were too.