The Power Of Charisma

[theSpeculator]

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THE POWER OF CHARISMA

"I’d like to touch on a very special topic today.
When you understand the dimension of attraction
being discussed here, suddenly everything else
seems like baby stuff, really.

I’m talking about charisma.

Charisma is the stuff that blows apart everything else.

Charisma is how a supposedly “little” guy walks into
a set where a super hot girl is surrounded by a bunch of
steroid-juiced bad-assed dudes, and he seems to have
no method to his madness, and a few minutes later,
he walks away with her, and she is THANKING HER
LUCKY STARS for it.

Charisma is the closest thing to MAGIC in this
field that actually exists for real. And to the
untrained eye, it simply doesn’t make sense.
It sounds bizarre. Kind of like how if I told you
that you yourself are not the same you as you
were a second ago, that a molecule that was,
say, part of your brain a second ago, is now a
molecule belonging to the seat you are sitting on.
Sounds strange, but it’s true. Quantum physics
says so. I want you to start opening your mind
to the idea that things DON’T always follow the
logic you are used to.

Reality is NOT what it seems, so don’t let the
picture of reality that you have been brainwashed
into believing by your past experiences dictate your
vision of what is possible.

Charisma is a PULL.
It makes people around that charismatic person want
to be CLOSE to that person, they can’t HELP it.

The reason for this is because they are RADIATING
something insanely powerful, something that
BYPASSES all the weak superficial stuff of
our logical minds and goes DIRECTLY for our
EMOTIONAL REGION, the region which counts.

Now, obviously, the entire topic of charisma is
a HUGE topic, but let’s just take a look for
a second at some living proof at how physical looks
are not the end all and be all of attraction.

Instead of focusing on male stars, I want to
actually do this a bit in reverse here, to
make my point even CLEARER. Now,
Britney Spears for example is clearly
considered by millions of guys as a really
sexy and super hot girl. When a lot of guys
are asked “who would you sleep with if
you could sleep with anybody” a LOT of
guys would say something like Britney Spears.

I mean, most guys would sell their mother for
a chance to be with good ol Britney, especially
the guys who say “she’s not that beautiful” lol.

Now, don’t get me wrong, she IS kind of pretty,
but there have been TONS of OTHER girls,
far better looking who have simply not come
even CLOSE to her success. If Britney wanted
to have become a model, she would have had
the door slammed in her face. She hasn’t
made a movie so far that anyone really
respects either. And apparently she isn’t
the greatest singer. But yet, she is the star
to which other girls and other women
WISH they could be.

Let me tell you the reason Britney was/is number
one for so long while other teen “queens” came
and went.

Britney understood the power of CONSTANTLY
SHARPENING HER IMAGE AND REINVENTING
HERSELF.

And, if you are to be successful at attraction,
you have to be very aware of the IMAGE
you are sending out through everything you
do, wear, and say, and of course be aware
of HOW you are doing all this.

Maybe Britney learned a lesson from her mentor,
Madonna, who herself was the master of this.

You see, now matter how cool or desirable you
NATURALLY are, people get DESENSITISED
fast. That’s why even good looking guys need
to learn this stuff if they plan to have any type
of long term success with a woman. Anyway, my
point is, I swear to you, if you could snap your
fingers right now and have any woman who you
ever dreamed of, or ever considered the SEXIEST
in the world, right now, if the ONLY thing she
had going for her was her looks, I swear you would
not think she is even CLOSE to as sexy as she was
the first time you were with her by the next MONTH
of being with her, never mind by the next year.
(unless you have learned the art of appreciation)
This is because of something known as desensitization.

If you want to make an EMOTIONAL IMPACT,
you have to KEEP BLASTING OUT NEW
EMOTIONAL STIMULI so that people can’t
get USED to you. That means if you are
chatting up a girl, you better not be the same
old, same old as she has seen a thousand times
before. Same old lines, same old personality,
same old clothing, same old attitude, same
old ZERO mystique. And just because you are
ORIGINAL is not enough either. A lot of guys
come to me and show me their choice of clothing
and keep telling me that it’s ORIGINAL.
But it has to be original AND cool.

By the way, Britney doesn’t get out of bed
looking the way she does in her videos.
There’s a ton of work involved in her
wardrobe, hair style, makeup, even the
exact ANGLES used to film her.

And then there’s the brutal physical workouts
and probably a pretty strict diet.

Of course, the same can be said about
any MALE star out there, obviously
a little less on the makeup though.

How much effort does the average guy
put into his basic self-presentation?

Okay, onward:
Britney started out as this cute innocent girl
that no one could hate. That’s NOT
a coincident. She was innocent BEFORE
she teased that she was “not so innocent”.

Now, I want you to think of the “innocent” image
and use it as an ANALOGY to YOU not coming
across as a total jerk.

When STARTING an interaction with a girl,
it makes NO SENSE to START OFF as a prick,
because the automatic reaction of a woman
will be to shut you down. She has nothing
invested in you, and unless you seriously
are some kind of absolute movie star, you will
be shut down before you can finish your sentence.

Back to Britney and the power of IMAGE:
Along with the innocence, came this sexy edge,
that was kind of controversial and unpredictable,
who is this crazy chick wearing an innocent
schoolgirl uniform and yet brazenly showing
her tummy?

Think of this as saying something to a woman
that THROWS HER A BIT OFF BALANCE,
while conveying value, confidence and sexuality
at the same time. Kind of like a friendly tease,
or dressing in an original and cool way, or making
a comment like using your skills of perception to
tell her something about herself that even SHE
probably didn’t know. Bottom line is you
are creating an emotional IMPACT, specifically
the emotion of attraction by conveying superiority.

Now, with Britney, of course her strategy of being
more original and cooler than her rivals, and keeping
people guessing where she was heading next,
WORKED TO PERFECTION.

This helped get her more attention, so she kept
on pushing the envelope in that direction,
CONSTANTLY BREAKING NEW GROUND
in terms of being provocative for a “good girl”
while still maintaining JUST ENOUGH of her good
girl image (not being a total jerk that people
would get pissed at and fed up with) so that
she didn’t make people think she was completely
fake, there was a tiny kernel of “good girl”
still left in her image, which was crucial for
her success.

It’s a real skill to ski these slopes because
too far in any direction and you can become
a cartoon of yourself, predictable, or worse-
hated, and you could really screw things up.

And then finally, when she finally took
it as far as people could saturate, going so
far as to kiss Madonna on tv, she then REVERSED
everyone’s expectation, becoming all spiritual
studying Kaballa, getting married, and now
supposed to have kids as a young mom in
Hollywood unlike her young singing rivals,
which makes her stand out once again and makes
her kind of a “good girl” again. Ahh, how sweet.

Madonna did the same thing, from Material
Girl to Ethereal Girl. Now, I really don’t
know for sure what her intentions are, and it
really doesn’t matter, the fact is, by
CONSTANTLY TWEAKING AND
SHARPENING AND ALTERING
AND EVOLVING HER IMAGE OF
COOLNESS AND SUPERIORITY,
she made more impact than her rivals.

She knew how to do it all without LOSING
the audience. She never became TOO
“dirty” like her once famous rival,
Christina Aguilera, who had far more
innate talent, and a far better voice,
and even won a Grammy.

Think of this as something similar to you
CREATING JUST THE RIGHT AMOUNT
OF TENSION with a woman, so that she
becomes interested, emotionally engaged,
but NOT fed up.

When a guy is going to chat up a girl, most guys
do the SAME OLD thing, creating almost NO
emotional impact. Or they get caught up on
ONE aspect of some guru’s methods, and
they beat that technique into oblivion, and
then they wonder why they don’t get anywhere.
This is why I keep on advocating being
THE MAN, in the ENTIRE sense of the
word, of really being the best, because it’s not
about just one thing. Or, some guys will
overcompensate for being a nice guy in the
past by becoming total jerks in the present,
and that is kind of like the famous celebrity
who acts like a TOTAL CREEP or TOTAL
SLUT or TOTAL JERK, and then no one likes
them and they lose their fans.

This is like when I see guys going too far with
girls and the girl just kind of makes this look
with her eyes rolling like “whatever, loser”.

 

[theSpeculator]

The successful celebrities know they have to
project just the right mix of being a good person
so that they can be liked, but yet also push the
line so that people can’t BE ABSOLUTELY
SURE they have the person “figured out”,
the successful stars push the envelope so that
people are INTRIGUED with wanting to
FIND OUT more about them. They keep
people CHASING, emotionally. And most
importantly, the best stars know how to
CONSTANTLY keep coming up with
AWESOME AND NEW “STUFF”,
whether it’s music or movies or whatever,
that manages to tie their IMAGE into
their art so that they blend as one, thus
even their art is really just another dimension
of their IMAGE. That’s why people go
to the concerts, not for the music, they
can get that on cd, they go because of
the BUILT UP IDENTITY – the IMAGE.
A chance to BE NEAR the PERSON.

These people know (or their managers, etc)
how to CREATE emotions get people a bit shocked,
all the while EXUDING an aura of superiority
through their looks, talent, publicity, brilliant
videos directed by the best in the industry,
usually not themselves. They also know how
to EXPRESS THEMSELVES using even
the most SUBTLE of things, like little expressions
on their face. You think I’m kidding here?
These folks are TRAINED to the point where
it is natural now for them. Watch a music video
and notice EXACTLY the expressions on the
star’s face, or watch a movie with a real bonafide
talented actor or actress, and you will see that
they exude charisma in everything they do.

If a guy were to bump into Britney in say, a mall,
chances are he would feel overwhelmed, all because
of the impact her IMAGE has made on him.

When Arnold was in his heyday, in the early 90’s,
even the coolest guys thought this guy was cool,
because his movies were COOL, original, they
make emotional IMPACT. The stories were cool,
the settings were cool, the look and style of these
flicks were cool and original. Then, after the guy
started making kind of mediocre movies, slowly
the same guys that made him a hero would make
jokes about how dumb guys must be to go to his
movies. Of course, they forgot that they were
part of the same crowd. They didn’t even realize
that it was Arnold who changed, it was his
IMAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Suddenly the idea of hanging out with Arnie wasn’t
as cool. See how people are?

This has EVERYTHING to do with ATTRACTION:
YOU ARE ONLY AS ATTRACTIVE AS THE
IMAGE YOU ARE GIVING OFF, RIGHT THIS
VERY SECOND.

Yesterday is pretty much history, and that can be a
good thing if you’ve screwed up a lot in the past!

What matters is the image you are GENERATING
AT THE MOMENT, for that’s all people remember
or care about.
Oh, YESTERDAY you were cool?
Nobody cares.
Oh TOMORROW you know you’ll be cool?
Nobody cares.

Can you say Ricky Martin?
That dude came on the scene and girls were
NUTS about him. This guy had the looks,
the voice, etc.

So how come he vanished into thin air while
other dudes, FAR LESS good looking, keep
on rockin and keep on appealing to women?

Because he kept repeating the same old, same
old, and had no COMPLEXITY to his image,
he was too easy to “figure out”, while the other
dudes KNEW/KNOW HOW TO KEEP
CREATING EMOTIONAL IMPACT
through their FRESH CREATIVE CONTENT
and their ability to RE-INVENT themselves,
thereby giving people, and chicks, ENDLESS
EMOTIONAL HIGHS and “addicting them”.

That’s the other point – if you can CONSISTENTLY
do enough attractive things, whether it’s a
confident sense of humor, or your ability
to capture someone’s imagination or fantastic
body language or vocal tonality or a host of
other things, if you can consistently do
attractive things, then somehow YOU become
attractive. It just works this way.

Anytime you ever watch a good movie, you
DON’T know exactly what’s going to happen,
yet you are CONSTANTLY being bombarded
with stimuli, via a powerful story, powerful
sound effects, special visual effects, music,
etc. You are on the EDGE OF YOUR SEAT
AT ALL TIMES.

The masters of attraction understand that human
beings are EMOTIONAL CREATURES and
EVERYTHING they do is designed to create
impact, on every level, the visuals, their choice
of clothing, the way they come across in their
voice, the way they handle situations with
women including things known as “****-tests”,
and of course the ability to generate the overall
psychological frame of superiority, and a ton of
other things as well, while SIMULTANEOUSLY
not being a jerk-off which would RUIN the
attraction.

Now, the problem is that a lot of guys hear
some basic good advice about being attractive,
like “be confident” or “have courage”, but they
don’t know what that REALLY means.
And even though this is basic stuff, far from
the most advanced information, it could still
make a a big difference for guys, if they
really took it to heart.

Like, for one guy, confidence might mean
having the guts to approach a woman and
say something to her. And that’s great, to
have the confidence for that, but honestly,
that’s just the starting point for REAL
CONFIDENCE."

From the datingwizard.com

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[Mixah]

That was Awesome!

Great tip. If there's one thing I could never understand it was charisma. Some people say it's natural, some say you can change it, the question being how can I just go out and be charismatic? I'm condfident, but sometimes I find myself unable to "captivate" a crowd. Thanks!

 

[Skullcrusher]

Paris Hilton and Carrot Top does this, yet I am incredibly repulsed by them.

Because of that, the author's two posts made no sense.

I'm going to eat some chow mein now.

 

[cinephile]

This is more a technique to help maintain charisma, not so much to develope it. As for movie stars, what they do is more or less draw on diferent sides of their own image, not so much reinvent themselves. A perfect example is Julia Roberts who deliberately took a role like Erin Brockovich not so much to reinvent herself but further deepen her ties to the average, middle american film goer. Its more finding a diferent way to express the same old values.

As for charisma in itself, well I really don't know. Some people just seem to have it, and most don't. It would seem to me that a truely charismactic person has the following qualities:

1. Is unique and indiviualistic
2. Is positive and interesting
3. Can develope deep rapport with anyone seemingly effortlessly
4. Can make you feel like the center of attention.

I sure don't know who do it

 

[The Illumi-nation]

Mystique is quite the attribute to keep with the people you associate with on a daily basis, such as co-workers.