The ONLY question you need to ask yourself. (Dealing with fear)

[Gubby]

I'll keep this short and sweet.

When you're scared of something, you search desparately for an excuse you can use to relieve the tension. Some logical reason why it's a bad idea. Rationalising your fears, you probably already know, is bad.

But sometimes it's hard to tell the rationalisation from real issues you should address. For instance, telling yourself that the babe doesn't want to be disturbed is bad rationalisation. However, if she has a 300-pound boyfriend (all muscle), and he says to her, "I'm sure glad no-one's trying to hit on you because then I'd be forced to hurt my knuckles", well, you get it. Actually, it's very rare to find a situation like that. But when you get your poor mind in a twist over your fears, it can still be difficult to tell a bad rationalisation from common sense.

So, make it simple. When fear comes, stop and ask yourself, do I WANT to do this? The first word that comes to your mind will be your decision. After that you might get the words "..but this and that".. BUT NOTHING. Yes or no. Let that seal it.

 

[Gubby]

This has been for me one of my most useful inner game techniques... so I'd be interested if you told me what you think, dammit. XP

 

[flippinfreak]

It's a womans technique... they call it intuition. It draws directly from emotions. Mainly fear. So most of the time, it is fear that answers, and fear, or lack of it, that says approach, or don't approach. It's not logic that answers first, it's premade patterns of emotions that were rationalized.

What you have to do, is just think, is this girl a total b!tch, "let's go find out" or is this girl happy "let's go find out"

There should never be any logical explanation why you SHOULDN'T approach a girl that is approachable. The ONLY time you should be thinking about NOT approaching a girl, is when you KNOW that you will only make it worse.

 

[Gubby]

It's a womans technique...

What are you referring to? Did you actually read the post?

 

[flippinfreak]

Yes, and it IS intuition you are hoping for.

The first moment you ask yourself whehter you want to approach or not.

When fear comes, stop and ask yourself, do I WANT to do this? The first word that comes to your mind will be your decision. After that you might get the words "..but this and that".. BUT NOTHING. Yes or no. Let that seal it.

Most of the time, there IS NO relization you can come to, that will be TRUE that will limit you from approaching her.

Womens intuition, and mans, are based on the strongest emotion, fear. The strength of the fear, if this works for you, is low, will determine if you approach or not.

 

[Gubby]

The fact is, if you see a hot babe, you WANT to approach her, or you wouldn't have to agonise over it. The question, "do I want to do this", cuts through the bull**** and makes it clear what the course of action should be.

But approaching was just an example. It works with any sort of fear. Approaching was a bad example.. Procrastination is fear, for instance. If you ask yourself, "do I want to do this", you have two courses of action: don't do it and face the consequences of not doing it, or do it.

 

[flippinfreak]

Ah, now your post makes sense.

rewrite it better as a tip

 

[thefonz]

What you have to do, is just think, is this girl a total b!tch, "let's go find out" or is this girl happy "let's go find out"

I do this too, it stops you from living in your head.......I'll just refuse to let myself think about it any longer by saying, "Alright, either your going to go over there and find out for yourself, or your going to focus your mind on something else." This is a very good habit to get into.