The most wtf first dates you have ever been on

[CornbreadFed]

1)
Matched on OLD during the pandemic. She said she was “too busy” to meet up because of school, so I figured alright, whatever.
Then out of nowhere, she invites me on a 3-day trip to Cancun on her dime. First time I ever see this girl in person is at the check in line at the airport. I’m standing there thinking, this is either going to be epic or I’m waking up missing an organ. To my luck, she was hot, not a catfish, we got a free trip to Mexico, fvcked a lot, and I ended up dating her for a bit. Looking back, I’m like why the fvck did I agree to that. Then again, free Cancun.

2) THIS IS WHY YOU DON"T ACT BUTTHURT AND DELETE NUMBERS/BURN BRIDGES
In college, I asked this girl to hang out and she didn’t respond. Cool, whatever, I kept on with my life. Two weeks later, after a night shift, she hits me up out of nowhere asking if me and my roommate want to go to the bars. I say sure. She pulls up with two other girls. On the way there they are taking shots and ripping bong hits in the car like it’s a BET rap video. I’m in the back seat thinking this night is going to end with me in jail. We get to the bar, me and the girl start making out, she asks if I want to go back to her place. We drive back, I am drunk, and my roommate completely freezes up and doesn’t make a move.
So I end up fvcking all three of them that night. The next morning, I wake up to roosters crowing and realize that I am in some bum fvck Egypt county that doesn't have an interstate. I ended up seeing the original girl for a couple months, but she kept giving me insane hickies like she was trying to brand me.
Fun while it lasted, but she had a bit too much 304 energy for me.

3)
I asked a girl from class to hang out and we ended up going to a party at my fraternity brother’s place.
We get there, and she tells me she is waiting for her friend to arrive so she does not feel weird being alone at a party with some guy from class. I’m like sure, makes sense. Her friend shows up and I am just trying to run game and not say anything stupid. Then my date gets into a fight with another girl at the party who apparently had a crush on me. I break it up, she says she just wants to go home, and I am like yeah, I get it. However, her friend, the one who arrived later, says she doesn’t want to waste the night for nothing, and if I can get her a ride home, we will fvck. Easy move. Got the pledge to drive us back to her dorm and did not end the night dry after all.

 

[BPH]

Not a first date, but I've got a pretty good story of something that went to sh** that had a heroic recovery.

My senior year in college, I was trying to decide who I wanted to take to our fraternity formal. Every year, my frat would rent out the majority of the rooms in a beachside hotel, you'd double up with another brother and his date, and basically spend the weekend getting wasted on the beach before going to a nearby venue to continue the degeneracy. The girls would design a themed cooler and stock it with alcohol for the weekend.

Anyway, there was a girl I'd hooked up with once or twice who I originally wanted to bring, but she wouldn't be available to come with me that weekend. I ended up asking my 2nd choice, a girl I hadn't slept with who had a boyfriend when I met her, but was now single. She accepted, so she was to be my date.

The funny thing is, the first girl came over a couple of days before formal, we hooked up, and she told me her plans had changed and she wasn't leaving that weekend, and asked if I still wanted her to be my date. I told her that I'd asked somebody else after she'd said no, and told her that I'd have to commit to that choice. She understood.

So my date makes a really cool pirate-themed cooler, since I love Captain Morgan rum, and the brothers all arrive at the hotel and get to drinking. Later that night, I end up sleeping with my date for the first time.

The next day, all the brothers and their dates (myself included) are on the beach getting hammered and playing random games, taking pictures, etc. I noticed my date wasn't there for several hours. She showed up much later, and I don't remember how it came to my attention, but I think some brothers told me that she had just left another brother's room. I confronted him about it, and he admitted that she came onto him, and they hooked up.

This gave me an idea...I called up the girl who was my first choice and asked if she was still available this weekend. I briefly explained the situation to her and asked if she wanted to come. She accepted, but told me she couldn't get there because she didn't have a car on campus. Fortunately, I had carpooled with the brother I was sharing the room with, so my car was still on campus, and my biological, younger brother was also on campus. I then called him up, had him pick up my keys, deliver them to this other girl, and sent her the address for her to drive my car down.

Later, I confronted the other girl and very calmly explained that I knew what she'd done. She initially denied it, but I told her that my brother came forward with everything. I told her that I was having this other girl come down to be my date instead, and that we would be enjoying alcohol that she had stocked for me. I told her that she could do whatever she wanted, but that she was no longer my date. She cried for a bit, then ended up calling her friend and got picked up and driven home.

Soon after, my 1st choice arrived, and we had a very fun night of going door-to-door to each brother's rooms to have fun and get wasted. I don't believe we hooked up at the hotel, but we did after we drove back from campus after the weekend and had a nap. This is the girl who would become my first serious girlfriend...

...but she's also the one I described before who ended up cheating on me when we were dating long-distance while falsely claiming she was r*ped, until I found the truth and she came clean months later...so a little bit of a W, a little bit of an L.

Still, it was a pretty dope story, and my brothers thought it was hilarious. The one who committed the act on the original date was very apologetic. I'm pretty sure he wasn't even aware that she was my date (which made sense, because some dates came as friends and brought their girlfriends).

 

[Solomon]

I've had a few first dates that were weird or from a episode of black mirror, I posted these in another thread but all these happened this year alone

I met the girl on Bumble this was January, short chick but with a nice ass in her late 30s. We went to a bar to have some drinks. Then she started getting into the story of why she and her husband divorced. Come to find out he was a closeted "Crossdresser" who wanted to come out to his wife. She started getting into details of him liking to get pegged etc and seeing her husband order dresses on Amazon. In between sips of her Long Island. Mind you while she is telling the story her voice is loud as ****. I'm trying to redirect the conversation but nope now it's trauma bonding time for her or therapy and keeps going. I'm trying to tell her to keep it down cause the bar is packed and even though we are in a booth, I know people can hear us. She of course says she doesn't care and doubles down on her voice, going louder at this point I know this girl is off, and I'm making exit plans.I try to finish the date as quickly as possible. Ended up walking to her car and she is sobbing about the state of her life then asked me to go home with her(if you catch my drift), I was so turned off that I declined and never saw her again.

Story 2

This happened back in May. I was talking to this girl (on Bumble) She seemed like the nature type, you know, likes to go camping, hiking being in the woods. She was tall 6'1, volleyball player built chick, nice small tight ass. From talking to her I thought she was going to be one of those book worm types, Boy was I wrong! I met her at this dive bar I like to go to. She show's up in a hoodie and sweatpants. hair is not done, not even make up it's like she got up from hours of her couch and straight to the date. I mean it was appropriate for the venue but I was put off, for a first date even sweatpants are low standards in the Midwest. I know I'm not feeling her of the bat. So I'm counting the minutes before I leave. Ended up finding out she was an alcoholic. She is bragging about how much she drinks and is proud to be a self-proclaimed alcoholic. She asked me If I like cigars. I say I do. She says she has cigars from her recent trip to the Dominican Republic. We go in her car to smoke a Dominican cigar. As soon as I enter her car smells like diaper ****, it was disgusting. After 2 puffs from the cigar I couldn't sit there anymore and told her I had to work early. Deleted her number when I got home.

Story 3
I matched with this older chick she is cute but 50. I go to her place and we drink and hook up right after we hook up she tells me that she loves me and asked if she can burrow $2 as a joke. I'm turned off but she flat out says she loves me and wants me to be in here live and she Is willing to do whatever. This girl came of looney I blocked her number didn't see her again.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Just a few off the top of my head. Not necessarily’dates’ per se.

1) Joined a hiking group in SoCal to visit a remote desert area. Drank some bad hotel coffee that am before the meet up. The group was mostly middle aged people, but one young UNLV student, a cute girl. Well the bad coffee kicked in and it gave me the runs. I had to hike to the horizon to take a dump, as there wasn’t much cover in this part of the desert.
I told the leader I was going to head back to town and would meet them tomorrow.

The UNLV girl & I had chatted a little bit earlier. I told the group I’d be leaving. She said she wanted to drive into town with me.
She had a nice mustang. We caravaned about an hour to the little town. In town she said we should get a room at the motel. I told her; ‘You understand why I needed to leave, right.’ She said: ‘I’m sure the motel has a shower.’

We got the room. The next day we didn’t meet up with the group but did our own thing.
We wound up getting together again over NYE in LA.

2) Took a ‘hippie-ish’ auto repair class in SF. One of my fellow students was a pretty girl. We got to chatting. She told me she planned to drive down Hwy 1 to Big Sur after class and invited me to go along. I did. We had a great time. She had one of those VW camper vans.

I got more. Too lazy to post them now. Maybe later.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Not a first date, but I've got a pretty good story of something that went to sh** that had a heroic recovery.

Holy crap, I have a similar fraternity story to that, but I didn’t get laid lol. It was definitely one of my biggest Ls lol. I’ve also did that to other fraternity brothers too lol. Frat life is truly a de-bluepilling experience.

 

[Divorced w 3]

I was on an OLD many moons ago and it was awful - she was absolutely crazy, so I left there blasted, just was downing martinis - she called me the following day and told me nobody ever leaves her like that on a date and that she fvcked another guy that night at the bar - I said good I wouldn’t have even fvcked you with his d1ck - and she absolutely lost her mind - it was very satisfying - my roommate heard the call and spit his drink out

 

[darksprezzatura]

Nothing phases me anymore, I miss the time I wasn’t so jaded