The most annoying thing about being unsuccessful with women

[Exhumed]

is having to hear idiotic advice from everyone you know on how to become better with women. Especially when anyone who has ever had sex thinks they have a valuable opinion you couldn't possibly have heard. Wow, confidence is important? Really? Gee thanks.

I just wanted to vent and see if anyone else experiences this on a regular basis and hates it...I've been working on my game and appearance for roughly two years, and I've made a hell of a lot of improvement, but it can be a slow process.

 

[iliketennis]

maybe you should listen to your friends.. they probably know you pretty well

 

[COD]

Generic Advice..........spare Me

well U might ask SPECIFICS..........it's a skill set like most things in life........if u want to improve ask others SPECIFIC ADVICE.

THIS PICKUP ARTIST THINGY is, are you ready.........A WAY OF LIFE.

I AM SO NOT A FAN OF GENERIC ADVICE.........just be your yourself, confidence and humor are qualities chics dig,get 6 pack abs, use back handed compliments.......blah blah blah.........OYE VAY!!!!!!!

I guess starting out and even fully understanding this whole process is best referenced with MASLOWS TRIANGLE MOTIVATIONAL CHART. You have to be successful in ALL AREAS of your life to get to the next level of success.

It begins with INNER GAME AND that means research, doing emperical testing and making adjustments. You have to COMPRHEND how attraction works and know which targets are most likely gonna find you entertaining.......LET ME SAY THAT AGAIN.......TARGET SLECTION IS YET ANOTHER SKILL PUA's should posses in their toolkit.

Once you do your homework and have a profound understanding of the "game" works you can move FROM THEORY TO PRACTICALITY( REAL LIFE SCENARIOS).

Most of the advice you find here or in most places for that matter, WILL CONFLICT with each other..........sad, unfair, CONFUSING........and IN reality true. So how do u proceed, which advice do u follow...........ANSWERS vary with each individual and or scenario.

BUT what we all have in common is basic foundation of "default settings". Once you achieve success on any level, time to move up........but never stop improving. We all started off inept with the opposite sex, only when we reached the "i'm am sick of this life" level did we seek improvement.

You will arrive at the conclusion, becoming a social artist has little to do with women.......seduction is a by-product, an added bonus if you prefer.

IT TAKES TIME TO BECOME A MASTER, sure you can use cheat-codes.....but in the long run you short change yourself. If you just want to get laid every weekend........best to stick with cheat codes. IF YOU WANT TO BECOME A MASTER, THEN do the work.

TONS OF SPECIFIC HELP OUT THERE TO CHOOSE FROM.........BUT doing it all by yourself all the time is exhausting. IF YOU ARE REALLY SERIOUS.......i'd say seek out people who are already social artists and hang with them.

 

[Scion]

yes it's annoying but what are you gonna do?

 

[Sir Psycho Sexy]

You must be giving them a moment in the conversation where they feel it would be appropriate to offer "advice"

You should practice controlling the conversation when with your friends, it would get rid of this annoying thing for you and is a good social skill to have.

 

[Exhumed]

Sir Psycho Sexy: I like your response. Perhaps you're right...do you have any suggestions or resources for controlling the conversation when with friends? It's easy enough when talking to a girl you're comfortable with--just take whatever she's saying and use it to tease her or turn the conversation to something sexual--but I don't know how to do it very well with my friends. Also, amongst my high school friends, one of my friends ALWAYS talks way too much and controls the conversation, until one of the rest of us comment on it, and then he usually continues. Any way to counter that? Ah well, I'll be going back to college in two months.

tobylikestennis: True, they do, and occasionally they tell me something about myself that makes me go "Hm, I've never looked at it that way" but it's usually new friends who don't know me too well yet that like to give vague, ****ty advice. Like, "All you need is a smile and a comment. Make a flirty comment, smile, and walk away, then come talk to her again later." (This came from a 20 year old who has had sex with a total of 3 women)

COD: I wonder if you even read my post. I'm not a social retard who knows nothing about women, and I'm familiar with all the theory; I just need some practice and a little luck. That's why I roll my eyes when people give me vague or obvious advice.

 

[Maxtro]

Most advice is generic simply because most people really don't have a clue. Instead of telling you, "I'm sorry, I don't know." They say you need to be confident and talk to girls etc. In all honestly a person can get that advice from their mother.

 

[Nygard]

Even if they really really know, most of them won't be able to give you good advice. For example, I have friends who are learning english. When they ask me to teach them stuff, I just can't. It's how my brain works! How do I teach how my brain is wired?

 

[moneyisking]

All I can tell you is... be the best of your self first, then girls will follow. It took me long years to understand what this meant, and I am still on the path. But like I said, no matter how much you try, girls will not be yours until you understand that you must spend everything (time, money, energy, reading, effort, etc) on yourself first to become a better, successful person with corresponding attitude. Until then, no you won't get girls easily if any.

 

[Kirro]

All I can tell you is... be the best of your self first, then girls will follow. It took me long years to understand what this meant, and I am still on the path. But like I said, no matter how much you try, girls will not be yours until you understand that you must spend everything (time, money, energy, reading, effort, etc) on yourself first to become a better, successful person with corresponding attitude. Until then, no you won't get girls easily if any.

Seriously this. This all the advice most guys even need,

 

[Just a Shot Away]

Seriously this. This all the advice most guys even need,

That guy's a virgin, dude. I don't like to rain on anybody's parade since this site should be about helping each other, but virgins really have no place giving guys advice on how to get laid.



To the OP, I have the same problem and two similar quotes come to mind for this dilemma:

"I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand."

- Confucius

"The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires."

- William Arthur Ward


I believe the takeaway message from these is that you can only learn so much from this site and the advice people give you. Perhaps the best way to truly become better with women is to actually go out into the field, with a mentor at first, and then gradually on your own and just learn via trial and error.

 

[Zarky]

Want some real advice?

The vast majority of guys will not have much luck with women until they (the guys) are at least in their late 20s, and often not until they're in their 30s and sometimes 40s. So just relax, don't marry the first tart who spreads her legs for you, don't accidentally knock up some chick, don't get arrested for anything major, concentrate on your education, and you'll be doing fine in 10-15 years.

 

[Cinamon]

All I can tell you is... be the best of your self first, then girls will follow. It took me long years to understand what this meant, and I am still on the path. But like I said, no matter how much you try, girls will not be yours until you understand that you must spend everything (time, money, energy, reading, effort, etc) on yourself first to become a better, successful person with corresponding attitude. Until then, no you won't get girls easily if any.

I think this is really good advice. As for what Just a shot away said, even if the guy is a virgin, it probably means he is struggling to put it in to practice, but the advice is excellent.

 

[kingsam]

Want some real advice?

The vast majority of guys will not have much luck with women until they (the guys) are at least in their late 20s, and often not until they're in their 30s and sometimes 40s. So just relax, don't marry the first tart who spreads her legs for you, don't accidentally knock up some chick, don't get arrested for anything major, concentrate on your education, and you'll be doing fine in 10-15 years.

and a LOT of the younger guys who act naturally like a DJ, wont be able to explain it, they just do it...!

 

[Schwank]

All I can tell you is... be the best of your self first, then girls will follow. It took me long years to understand what this meant, and I am still on the path. But like I said, no matter how much you try, girls will not be yours until you understand that you must spend everything (time, money, energy, reading, effort, etc) on yourself first to become a better, successful person with corresponding attitude. Until then, no you won't get girls easily if any.

No offence, but aren't you the dude that makes thread after thread regurgitating the same rehashed theme -- i.e. "I can't get girls"?

 

[Schwank]

There's nothing but rambling diatribe, for the most part, on these boards concerning peoples lack of success with women. Look, you don't need to read book after book on bull**** "Pick-up Theory". Nor do you have to scrutinize every little aspect of your "game" (god, I hate that word in this context). MOST guys NEVER read anything about how to get girls, because you don't have to. It boils down to three simple things: Decent Looks, Social Skills, Humour, A Decent Sized Social Circle.

I think most you guys on these boards who are dateless and layless, if you aren't physically unappealling, are lacking social skills. And I think that should be one's #1 priority. Get that in tune and something WILL happen with the fairer sex. 'Nuff said.

 

[Scion]

It boils down to three simple things: Decent Looks, Social Skills, Humour, A Decent Sized Social Circle.

that's 4 things dude :crackup:

I think most you guys on these boards who are dateless and layless, if you aren't physically unappealling, are lacking social skills. And I think that should be one's #1 priority. Get that in tune and something WILL happen with the fairer sex. 'Nuff said.

Maybe. But what do you think the cause is if your attractive and have social skills?

I personally put more effort into my social circle than into girl mainly because I actually enjoy myself when I'm hanging with friends. I don't have as much fun with most girls.

 

[Schwank]

that's 4 things dude :crackup:



Maybe. But what do you think the cause is if your attractive and have social skills?
.

Oops! Quite right. Yes, 4 things...

As for your question, that I can't explain, since nearly all of the attractive, socially ept folk I know DO get girls. However, there is an exception. I know one good-looking dude who's socially smooth... except with the girls. With girls he lacks confidence, and that, as most know, is unappealling.

Moreover, I think many guys who claim to be hot, aren't as hot as they think they are, or else they would be picking up signals from girls constantly. Trust me, for the most part, if a girl is interested, she WILL give "approach me" signals.

 

[Scion]

Oops! Quite right. Yes, 4 things...

As for your question, that I can't explain, since nearly all of the attractive, socially ept folk I know DO get girls. However, there is an exception. I know one good-looking dude who's socially smooth... except with the girls. With girls he lacks confidence, and that, as most know, is unappealling.

Moreover, I think many guys who claim to be hot, aren't as hot as they think they are, or else they would be picking up signals from girls constantly. Trust me, for the most part, if a girl is interested, she WILL give "approach me" signals.

yay, the guy you described is basically me, except that I do have some confidence with women (but this is something I've only been able to develop in the last year or so)

 

[teacha]

All I can tell you is... be the best of your self first, then girls will follow. It took me long years to understand what this meant, and I am still on the path. But like I said, no matter how much you try, girls will not be yours until you understand that you must spend everything (time, money, energy, reading, effort, etc) on yourself first to become a better, successful person with corresponding attitude. Until then, no you won't get girls easily if any.

This.