Pecker
Senior Don Juan
I recommend that anyone having trouble with women should buy and read some books on cultivating positive self-esteem. And I'll tell you why.
I was talking to my friend who is a pretty good DJ. We were talking and I forget how it came up, but he mentioned how I was neurotic. He was right. I realized that neuroses aren't exactly attractive and that I needed to fix something.
Being neurotic is a symptom of low self esteem. The neurotic is always over internalizing, thinking too much, seeking the approval of others and coming off as gittery and nervous. Well no wonder I hadn't been getting the quality or quantity of girls I wanted...the signs of the neurotic are almost exactly those of a desperate AFC.
Self-Esteem is a kind of emotional immune system. Those with ample positive self esteem regenerate their positive attitude shortly after a failure, and are soon ready to jump back on the horse and try again. Those with poor self esteem might try something once, fail, and become so traumatized at the failure that they never try again. Sound familiar?
I remember last year, trying to be a big pimp in my first year of college. I took the "Why Not Just Be Yourself" article the wrong way, and used it to deplete my self esteem. I hung out with people waiting to be discovered as a loser at any moment, constantly playing a role. The truth is, "Don't Just Be Yourself" is flat out wrong, I've said this before. I prefer "Improve yourself, Be yourself" which is what the site is really about.
A person with low self esteem often cannot accept happiness because they feel they are not worth it. This is why I felt out of place and awkward the time I landed two dates with hotties in a single weekend. My DJing skills were sharp up to that point, but once faced with real success I blundered.
I forget exactly where he said it, but SexPDX said something very profound with regards to the importance of physical attractiveness. He said (paraphrasing) that good looks aren't the end-all-be-all of attracting women, but good looks make it easier to convince the woman that YOU, THE MAN are convinced of how attractive you are. Ya dig? In other words a woman might assume to begin with that the good looking man has high self-esteem, an inherently attractive trait.
Some guys here have had no success with women for SO long that the idea of attracting a good woman is too far beyond the realm of reality. They will even subliminally sabotage their good prospects so they won't have to face or change their self-images. For the chronically alone masturbators of this site, you need to accept that you are valuable and attractive in a way you haven't yet discovered.
This whole post sounds way too New-Agey, but I just don't think self-esteem is covered enough here. Confidence is, but confidence is a natural subsequence of healthy self esteem, and can't be faked. Ultimately self esteem is the one thing that will make you cool, collected, and keep you from attaching too much importance to any one interaction with women. After all, you don't need their approval, you have your own.
I was talking to my friend who is a pretty good DJ. We were talking and I forget how it came up, but he mentioned how I was neurotic. He was right. I realized that neuroses aren't exactly attractive and that I needed to fix something.
Being neurotic is a symptom of low self esteem. The neurotic is always over internalizing, thinking too much, seeking the approval of others and coming off as gittery and nervous. Well no wonder I hadn't been getting the quality or quantity of girls I wanted...the signs of the neurotic are almost exactly those of a desperate AFC.
Self-Esteem is a kind of emotional immune system. Those with ample positive self esteem regenerate their positive attitude shortly after a failure, and are soon ready to jump back on the horse and try again. Those with poor self esteem might try something once, fail, and become so traumatized at the failure that they never try again. Sound familiar?
I remember last year, trying to be a big pimp in my first year of college. I took the "Why Not Just Be Yourself" article the wrong way, and used it to deplete my self esteem. I hung out with people waiting to be discovered as a loser at any moment, constantly playing a role. The truth is, "Don't Just Be Yourself" is flat out wrong, I've said this before. I prefer "Improve yourself, Be yourself" which is what the site is really about.
A person with low self esteem often cannot accept happiness because they feel they are not worth it. This is why I felt out of place and awkward the time I landed two dates with hotties in a single weekend. My DJing skills were sharp up to that point, but once faced with real success I blundered.
I forget exactly where he said it, but SexPDX said something very profound with regards to the importance of physical attractiveness. He said (paraphrasing) that good looks aren't the end-all-be-all of attracting women, but good looks make it easier to convince the woman that YOU, THE MAN are convinced of how attractive you are. Ya dig? In other words a woman might assume to begin with that the good looking man has high self-esteem, an inherently attractive trait.
Some guys here have had no success with women for SO long that the idea of attracting a good woman is too far beyond the realm of reality. They will even subliminally sabotage their good prospects so they won't have to face or change their self-images. For the chronically alone masturbators of this site, you need to accept that you are valuable and attractive in a way you haven't yet discovered.
This whole post sounds way too New-Agey, but I just don't think self-esteem is covered enough here. Confidence is, but confidence is a natural subsequence of healthy self esteem, and can't be faked. Ultimately self esteem is the one thing that will make you cool, collected, and keep you from attaching too much importance to any one interaction with women. After all, you don't need their approval, you have your own.
Stupendous, Pecker. Good job. Where ya from in Los Angeles, btw? I'm from the South Bay Area.