"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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The main bottleneck

tmpgstx

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Most guys encounter a bottleneck at the phone number. In other words, once they get the number (if it is the right one), problems such as said woman not being home or screening calls etc. is all too common it seems.

I think you'll often find that women doing this (flaking out) also have many other 'guy friends', and give their number at a club quite a bit. If she detects you're to serious aka responsible, she'll avoid you.

On the other hand, if you come across as a flaming idiot to these types of girls with not a care in the world, and you're remotely cute, then you might bed her down. It's almost a fact. It seems these girls have sex with these guy friends, but have no respect for them. The ones they do have respect for, they don't get involved with

This type of girl, by having sex with a guy she respects will not feel right about it. Why? Because she doesn't feel worth it, and knows her nature and that will be sleeping with other guys while dating someone she respects, puts her in a bad position in both terms of worthiness, and at a crossroads she's not ready to face (or ever will face responsibly).

So therein lies the answer why the nice but not submissve guy fails with flakey women and the flaming bumbling morons do not.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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sapphire

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It seems counterintuitive but I see that you make a good point.

I have encountered some women who seemed intimidated by my success and status but at the same time respected and admired my accomplishments. Yet, they would usually wind up fycking some pathetic loser instead.
 

tmpgstx

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Oh no doubt Sapphire. I've seen it over and over again, and not just with myself. It's usually the immature girls though that do this. Mature ones know what they want and usually it's stability and success wrapped up in a cute or handsome guy. The only problem here is that most of these girls are taken and stay committed. They usually get a pretty good guy too, so they are tied up in the long term.

The flakey ones are usually available, and they do get intimidated by someone they feel is out of their league, there is no doubt about it. Guys are different, we could give a **** if a girl is out of are league or not, if they want to ****, then we're right there, but girls are the other hand do not have that impulsive nature when it comes to sex. They do however if it feels right, and that would be impulsive with someone they feel on the same level with.
 

sapphire

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It is quite frustrating that this happens and yes it usually is with the immature low self esteem girls. It is frustrating because on paper at least I should be scoring left and right with the hot women. I am a lawyer making really good money, I have properties, a good car, etc and women have always complimented me on my looks. So what gives?

They don't feel good enough for you so they settle with someone who is more on their level. It is like going to a job interview and the employer rejecting you because you are overqualified.

The problem is that the hottest girls at least the ones that I like are usually the ones on the lower end of the social/economic scale and can't relate to a highly educated professional as myself. So when I tell them what I do and my background, they appear to get intimidated and write me off. That is not always the case but it happens alot. Sometimes they will say or wonder why I am interested in them as if to suggest that they are not good enough.

The hot high status confident women are usually taken so that makes things more difficult.

Looks also play a factor. If you look really good they will associate you as being a player so often times they will also write you off and settle with someone who they consider to be more of their league.

However, I think I discovered a niche that may suit me well. It is older but hot, independent and successful women who typically are well into their 30's and even 40's. I have been dating a couple and they seem to lack the hangups of the younger crowd. They know what they want and are not easily intimidated. One is a Venezuelan woman who is in her late 30's but looks at least 10 years younger and has a body most 20 year olds would envy. Another is a Colombian woman in her 30's who also is quite hot. These women are mature and much more interesting and not as boring as the younger girls I have dated in the past.

But I agree that being good looking and successful at the same time can be quite problematic.
 

tmpgstx

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They don't feel good enough for you so they settle with someone who is more on their level. It is like going to a job interview and the employer rejecting you because you are overqualified.
You said it. They will even come out say 'why would a guy like you be interested in me?' or, 'You are too hot for me'? I was actually having sex with a girl that told me this (the latter). I've also heard the first part.

Yeah, it's too bad they all can't have that maturity at 20 that they do at 30. Some never grow up, and oddly enough there are some that are mature at 20 and basically have the 30 maturity then.

As for communicating, yeah, that's a big disadvantage if you're much more educated then they are. Sometimes they'll even think you're trying to be arrogant by talking down to them - and yeahp, have heard this too.

At least some will leave a boyfriend knowing it's not what they want for a relationship, to be with someone they do want. These women are again mature, and usually get married to the guy they initially left their previous boyfriend for.

In this instance it's trial and error, and not just trial (like say for a week or two).
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Technical1

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This is something I have also encountered but only recognize just now reading this thread in hindsight. Its possible to be "too good" for some girls...

perhaps.
 
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