The Lowdown on Looks

[California Love]

A short, straight-to-the-point post -


Looks matter. A lot.


As we know, girls often say things contrary to their actions. Girls often say how much personality matters to them. The truth is, when they see an attractive male, the deal is done already.

DJing is based on inital attraction and that is accomplished purely out of appearance. I do have a few friends who are just decent looking and can pick up some alright chicks, but it does take them more effort, and they have low-moderate luck at social occasions with minimal talking, like dances.



One thing that does magic though is the way you walk. Always look up, and casually scan your surroundings. Do not avoid eye contact and do not end it until u walk past someone. Girls are totally intimidated and impressed by a guy who never looks down at the ground. It generates an aura of power around you.


Although the complexion of a face is hard to improve, definitely work on your body. A lean, atheletic body is universally attractive.


On clothes, women are split. There are huge differences in their opinions depending on race, age, and personality, so you will need to experiment around, or better yet, just ask your prospective partner what she likes. Girls love talking about clothes, especially with guys.

 

[jakethasnake]

This is so obvious. What's the point of this post?



The only deal-breaker is when an otherwise average looking male has the highest social status (this of course includes fame) - whether it's within a circle of friends/people or society in general. Otherwise, average guys can't always get hot chicks.

 

[Dirtheart]

Looks do count, as does one's whole appearance, but it's not everything. I used to think it was, and so everytime I was given the elbow I'd work more on my physical appearance (work out, buy new clothes etc).

I was seeing somebody not so long ago and when we first met, she treated me like a god. Said I was the best looking guy she'd ever been with and her friends agreed. She was constantly complimenting the way I look and I figured she'd never dump me.

However, she did dump me. She told me that my appearance posed a dilemma for her, but she wasn't "psychologically" attracted to me - basically due to me placing her on a pedestal and getting nervous in her presence.

I wasn't even sure whether to be hurt or flattered, but the important thing is I came to realise where I kept going wrong, why I could attract lots of women to begin with, but why I could never keep them interested.

Good looks will get you a head start, but as the bible and most people here will affirm - attitude is the key.

 

[tristan22]

I am here to tell you first hand, looks do not matter. I am a really good looking guy and either have a bad disposition or a terrible personality b/c i struggle to find women attracted to me. People can't believe that i don't get girls. I don't approach girls often, but when i do they usually show hostility, arrogance, or rudeness. Keep in mind, i've only approached females in a bar/club setting.....maybe this is why i'm failing?

I swear to god, when i approach a lot of women, they act as if charlie manson broke out of prison and standing right in front of them. Average Joes seem to be doing a lot better then me attracting the females.

Any suggestions?

 

[slipstreamer83]

Once I was speaking with a woman about this issue.

I asked her: "what is physical attraction for you?" And she told me that it was a calm man, good body language, not disturbing vocabulary, the way he looks, his physical appearance.

So I said "hang on, are you telling me that physical attraction is a combination of traits and not only looks?" She said yes, in a "you know, it´s evident" way. That puzzled me.

I asked her if her girlfriends would consider physical attraction the same way. She thought about it for a moment and said yes.

I told her that for me physical attraction is looks, 100%. So she said, "I can´t understand why a man can go out with a beautiful woman with nice body, but has horrible clothes!! I´ve seen it several times." And for me it was like "If she is hot and you get pvssy, who cares?"

So, our brains are different. There´s no way we can see their view, and they can´t understand ours. It´s really, really difficult for us to believe that physical appearance is just one more factor when considering if a guy is attractive or not. I still can´t understand it very well.

 

[Kineti[C]harm]

Its biology/chemistr 101....


Lets just put it this way. Looks is a factor.... If you have good looks (Your face and preferably also your body) then you have an extra factor going for you. Now the thing with looks is that we humans instinctivly trust people with good looks more because of good genes and stuff like that. One is also easier physically or sexually attracted to a person with good looks.

Good looks HELP YES, it doesnt matter as in its important but its a big plus!

Now if you add inn good bodylanguage, confidence, attitude and general Aura and presence, now you have more physical attraction!

Aslong as you arent buttugly do not worry. Yes if two guys have the same game and one is better looking he has it easier but thats life.... Good looks is often a curse because many of the guys with good looks have very bad confidence and are pvssies.... Not to mention many of good looking guys get really selfconscious about how they look (Trust me, looking in every second window you pass just to check your hair is a curse...)

What one SHOULD do is try to looks the best one can.
This means have NICE uptodate clothes that FIT YOU and YOUR PERSONALITY. Even try to experiment if you want to with some "Hipper" clothes, just aslong as you feel CONFIDENT.
Make sure your skin-complexion etc is nice. That is its not attractive if you have razorburns all over your neck or spots/zits etc....
Try to be wellgroomed as in get a nice stylish haircut that fits you and your facial structure (round, oval, square etc). Remove unecessary facial hair and keep it wellgroomed if you need to have some.
Wear a good cologne too (CK, Jean Paul, Lauder for men, whatever just a good one)..

Good tip :
Have a couple of CLOSE GOOD FEMALE FRIENDS take you out to shop etc. Get their opinion on what looks good on you + the saleslady or some other girl in the store shopping... Also get them to help you pick out a fragrance (cologne...) but make sure its a cologne YOU feel comfortable wearing.. You dont want to almost puke by drawing air do you?

So stop psyching yourself out and do what you can and just have fun

 

[hb]

Looks do matter, but dont you guys come accross those rare few that at first site you mistake them for "herbs" but once they start talking and smiling and joking around, you can just feel theyre confidence? I love watching guys like that...... Looks do matter but like someone said before, aslong as your well groomed all you need is charmmmmmmmmmm.


O and guys, I've been in a dilemna............
Out here you basically have to groups, the thugs that dress all baggy and ish and the white boys, who dress tight and pretty........ I came up with the idea to dress right in the middle and alot of people have noticed this, but ive noticed that im too thuggy for the white girls and too white boy for the thuggy girls......... It aint workin. I want BOTH!! wtf should i do.

 

[DJ_Dork]

Who the heck says LOOKS DO NOT MATTER? That is a false statement. Let me know when Cruise, Depp, and that Elf guy from LOTR stops getting catcalls.

 

[Derek Flint]

Good looks help, but they are not a requirement to get HB's

There are plenty of good-looking AFC's out there who can attract, but not keep HB's

Confidence, attitude and "game" are more valuable assets than looks, and are easier to obtain.

But one should improve the external things that they can, such as physique, clothing etc...

One can always use the excuse that "I'm not ________enough", but that type of thinking is counter-productive.

Improve on what you can, and don't worry about the things you can't.

 

[WhAcKeD!]

Looks matter a hell of a lot, we are all shallow whether we admit it or not. Its true our first impression (and also the one the sticks with us the most) is physical appearance. Thank God Im Blessed with good looks, just makes it hard sometimes to get in the correct mindset that I have the looks, now I need the charm, Ill admit, im reall paranoid about the way I look and Im always checking the mirror, but hey, thats life.

 

[ScrewIt]

Originally posted by Kineti[C]harm
Its biology/chemistr 101....


Lets just put it this way. Looks is a factor.... If you have good looks (Your face and preferably also your body) then you have an extra factor going for you. Now the thing with looks is that we humans instinctivly trust people with good looks more because of good genes and stuff like that. One is also easier physically or sexually attracted to a person with good looks.

KC, this is quite true. very often almost everytime im in the street or subway station ppl come up to me and ask for directions expecting me to know.

good looks will only get you so far, it'll get you through the door, but personality is what keeps you in hte door.

many times i've seen average to ugly looking guys have HB gf's in the streets countless times, there are so much other traits that add up to our attractiveness to a woman.

 

[drumr2]

I agree..

Originally posted by tristan22
I am here to tell you first hand, looks do not matter. I am a really good looking guy and either have a bad disposition or a terrible personality b/c i struggle to find women attracted to me. People can't believe that i don't get girls. I don't approach girls often, but when i do they usually show hostility, arrogance, or rudeness. Keep in mind, i've only approached females in a bar/club setting.....maybe this is why i'm failing?

I swear to god, when i approach a lot of women, they act as if charlie manson broke out of prison and standing right in front of them. Average Joes seem to be doing a lot better then me attracting the females.

I wish this weren't my first post here, but I totally agree with this guy. The few times I was drunk enough to conjure up the confidence to even look at a girl, they looked at me like I was trying to stab them or something. I've NEVER , in my entire had a half-way attractive girl flirt with me, yet I know guys who are butt-ugly who are always the center of attention. Meanwhile, I'm always the one standing in the corner, casually smilnig at all the people walking past me.


I have been told that I could get any girl I want...and sometimes I have (in the past), but I cannot keep a girl interested to save my life. I work on my appearance constantly, and the way I dress, but it gets me no attention at all. Oh well....I'll just keep reading this "DJ Bible" for now, but so far, it's all pretty hard to believe.

 

[ScrewIt]

same happens to me, i dress a little better than the average guy. and still it gets me nowhere. last time this guy asked me where my gf was i told him i didnt have one, he thought i was lying!
and he says he thinks i should be president of the club he's in, probably cause of my personality.

it's rare for a girl to flirt with me, the last time i recall one was at a party where this HB8 was pulling the "hey, have we met before" line on me.

last weekend i went to another party and i was socializing and chatting up with this HB6 who had bucktooth, right after getting her name, (bf was 2 feet away) her bf looks me in the eye for 1 sec then makes out w/his girl in front of me, this guy was only 16....i go in my mind..."ok...." then i walk away. he was pretty young and a little insecure, probably thought i was hitting on his girl.

i think women portray good looking guys to be player material and often dont give us a chance and instantly put up their ***** shield, or try to seem like they do...

 

[TonyTheTigerOI]

I love this topic. Hi, I'm Anthony, and I'm the best looking guy @ my school of 1,700. I'm 16 and I look 22. I charmed 15 women into signing a bill @ a model UN meeting... that won my school the championship. I've been asked to model 6 times.

I met a girl who I really liked. She was a lesbian (I didn't know at the time). After chatting with her for a week, I asked her out on a friday. She declined hanging out at the mall, saying she would prefer to go to the movies. We all know why high school girls want to go to the movies.

But I ****ed it up. I always **** it up when a girl I really like is on the line. Do looks matter? Of course. I have options most men never will. But can looks alone achieve ANYTHING? Nope. When I don't have my wits about me... when I'm truely baffled by a woman... I suffer the same fate as any man, ugly or not.

Looks provide options. Looks make things easier. But its how you present yourself and how you make her feel that ultimately decide the outcome of your relationship.

 

[So pimp its scary]

1. If looks matter that much, how can an ugly dude hook up with hot chicks?

I'll quote 'the Tao of Steve', "Some people can get by on just their looks, but for people like us, we need a little bit of skill and some intelligence." (paraphrased anyway)

 

[CLOONEY]

Originally posted by TonyTheTigerOI
I love this topic. Hi, I'm Anthony, and I'm the best looking guy @ my school of 1,700. I'm 16 and I look 22. I charmed 15 women into signing a bill @ a model UN meeting... that won my school the championship. I've been asked to model 6 times.

hahaha, you have counted exactly how many times you've been asked to be a model? Your the best looking guy at your school, according to who? Different girls go for different looks. Wheres your pic?

As for the debate, everyone knows the truth, no need to debate this topic again.

 

[TonyTheTigerOI]

Clooney - My pic is on ashley angels website [the 'masters' forum]... and my AIM handle is tonythetigeroi I'll send pics to whoever wants em.

So pimp - I've never seen 'ugly' guys with super hot chicks. A lot of times you hear people dibate this and they exhagerate how bad the guys looks and how good the girl looks. They do that to give noobs hope. BUT an AVERAGE looking guy who works hard on his appearence can get with most any woman he finds at the mall or downtown if he is confident charismatic and charming. But do you honestly think you could bag Brooke Burke? I think it would be a stretch for a guy with looks equivillent to ME.

 

[drumr2]

I honestly do think people should stay in their own leauges when it comes to looks. Sooner or later, we're all gonna have to face reality if we're not up to par with the kinds of people we want to be with. Some call it lowering of standards, but I just call it maturity.

 

[CrazyGoNuts]

ya know I actually posted a very similar topic about a month ago and I pretty much gave up on trying to meet attractive women because they are all shallow. I am no longer convinced that good looks are always needed. I see myself as an average looking guy at best and I recently started seeing a HB9. She's openly admitted to wanting me from the very beginning and most of her reasons are because of my personality. And her feelings are strong enough that she already cheated on her boyfriend with me so I wouldnt agree looks are everything as others have said.

 

[40quid]

Originally posted by So pimp its scary
1. If looks matter that much, how can an ugly dude hook up with hot chicks?

I'll quote 'the Tao of Steve', "Some people can get by on just their looks, but for people like us, we need a little bit of skill and some intelligence." (paraphrased anyway)

I'd have to agree with this statement. Now that I'm on the job market, I find that interviewing for jobs is a lot like PU. Your looks are like your resume that gets your foot in the door.

Some companies have automatic filters, where they don't even interview someone who falls below those standards (e.g., school pedigree, GPA, work experience). For both sexes, this is where the looks come in -- most of us have standards where we just won't even look at a girl if she doesn't have a certain amount of physical attractiveness. So, if you're in a club, concert, or some other loud environment, your physical attractiveness is just about the only thing you have going for you. Naturally, if you're average or below-average in the looks department, you're just not going to fair very well in these types of environments.

So to answer your rhetorical question, average and below-average guys can hook up with hot chicks, but you have to find your environment where you can demonstrate your value. And you have to foster a personality that is attractive to women. This means that you have to be not-needy, and supremely confident (IMHO, much more confident then your better-looking counterparts).

To paraphase Voltaire -- "give me ten minutes to talk away my ugly face and I will bed the queen of France."