"The List Of Rules For Dating" aka the AFC checklist

[Soprano]

someone sent this to me on MySpace lol:



This was written by a guy who has years of experience. Believe you me, most of them are true about girls....

1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at herr house...she runs around in their underwear just like we do.

2. DON'T CHEAT ON HER. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, she WILL find out and you will be mud.

3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat.

4. Never miss an opportunity to tell her she's beautiful.

5. Don't refuse to kiss her in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's just because they're jealous.

6. If she slaps you hard, you deserved it.

7. Don't be afraid to touch her if you want to. If she's going out with you in the first place, it's because she likes being in your arms.

8. If you don't sleep with her, DON'T tell your friends that you did.

8.5 If you DO sleep with her, DON'T tell your friends that you did.

9. You can be dirty minded in private, really...most of them are not offended by it...

10. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.

11. Most of them don't mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a *****..

11.5 Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!

12. Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship.

13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.

14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to beat the **** out of him.

15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.

16. Never, EVER slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.

17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.

18. You're dead meat if you can't get along with their pets, parents, and best friends. Be prince charming to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.

19. Don't flirt with their moms...that's just freaky.

20. Don't be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like ****, so be understanding.

21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.

22. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend.

23. Don't stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.

24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.

25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle.

26. Memorize their god damn birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.

27. Don't marinade the cologne, but smell good.

28. Don't give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. Jewelry is always nice.

29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.

30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.

(If you have read this and you are a girl, then some of these things are actually really true...am I right?! And if you read this and you are a guy, then these are like the mother ****in best tips you could ever get!)

You now have 2 options...
1) Repost this bulletin and you will have good luck in all your relationships.
2) Ignore this, and you will have bad luck in all your relationships...now you wouldn't want that, would you?

 

[Docs]

Originally posted by Soprano
someone sent this to me on MySpace lol:



This was written by a guy who has years of experience. Believe you me, most of them are true about girls....

1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at herr house...she runs around in their underwear just like we do.

2. DON'T CHEAT ON HER. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, she WILL find out and you will be mud.

3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat.

4. Never miss an opportunity to tell her she's beautiful.

5. Don't refuse to kiss her in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's just because they're jealous.

6. If she slaps you hard, you deserved it.

7. Don't be afraid to touch her if you want to. If she's going out with you in the first place, it's because she likes being in your arms.

8. If you don't sleep with her, DON'T tell your friends that you did.

8.5 If you DO sleep with her, DON'T tell your friends that you did.

9. You can be dirty minded in private, really...most of them are not offended by it...

10. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.

11. Most of them don't mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a *****..

11.5 Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!

12. Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship.

13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.

14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to beat the **** out of him.

15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.

16. Never, EVER slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.

17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.

18. You're dead meat if you can't get along with their pets, parents, and best friends. Be prince charming to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.

19. Don't flirt with their moms...that's just freaky.

20. Don't be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like ****, so be understanding.

21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.

22. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend.

23. Don't stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.

24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.

25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle.

26. Memorize their god damn birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.

27. Don't marinade the cologne, but smell good.

28. Don't give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. Jewelry is always nice.

29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.

30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.

(If you have read this and you are a girl, then some of these things are actually really true...am I right?! And if you read this and you are a guy, then these are like the mother ****in best tips you could ever get!)

You now have 2 options...
1) Repost this bulletin and you will have good luck in all your relationships.
2) Ignore this, and you will have bad luck in all your relationships...now you wouldn't want that, would you?

This is one of those email forward chain things. Some points are good, some are just crap. There are no rules.

 

[ethnomethodologist]

Re: Re: "The List Of Rules For Dating" aka the AFC checklist

Originally posted by Docs
This is one of those email forward chain things. Some points are good, some are just crap. There are no rules.

A) Some of the points that are crap, are actually gold if you learn like a DJ

B) True there are no rules, there are only guidlines at best. PS, this is not for seduction purposes, this is for dating, but can be applied to dating to a degree

C) Pook and Adump pokes fun at guys who are looking for a quick lay, this checklist will draw many guys who are truly lost with harsh words.

D) Great find, I hope somebody takes the time to break it down.

 

[Docs]

Re: Re: Re: "The List Of Rules For Dating" aka the AFC checklist

Originally posted by ethnomethodologist
A) Some of the points that are crap, are actually gold if you learn like a DJ

B) True there are no rules, there are only guidlines at best. PS, this is not for seduction purposes, this is for dating, but can be applied to dating to a degree

C) Pook and Adump pokes fun at guys who are looking for a quick lay, this checklist will draw many guys who are truly lost with harsh words.

D) Great find, I hope somebody takes the time to break it down.

Sorry, rushed post .

 

[Docs]

I love how we (even myself...) quote the whole damn thing. Should work on that.

 

[dipset_mafia]

problems::

Okay, if she's really your girlfriend - then you shouldn't be paying ALL the time - you should pay 1/2 the time, but not split everything, i.e. "I'll get it this time"...

a pretty ring is not necessary! unless you're very serious..... and then it should be an engagement ring!

maybe i'm cheap - or maybe I'm a university student on the grind...

never slap her?? 2 words... JAMES BOND...

just kidding...

 

[Soprano]

Originally posted by dipset_mafia
problems::

Okay, if she's really your girlfriend - then you shouldn't be paying ALL the time - you should pay 1/2 the time, but not split everything, i.e. "I'll get it this time"...

a pretty ring is not necessary! unless you're very serious..... and then it should be an engagement ring!

maybe i'm cheap - or maybe I'm a university student on the grind...

never slap her?? 2 words... JAMES BOND...

just kidding...

KILLA..........

 

[Kuhlraum]

I was going to post a new thread about that stupid chain letter.

I particularly like the "do you really need all your money? Pay all the time!"

Whatever, I am hardly successful with women, but I have learned one thing the hard way. That is DO NOT spend money on them. Every girl that I have ever spent money on has walked all over me. I won't do it anymore. Of the two girls that I have been with, one of them I have never spent a cent on and the other I bought her a bday present once, like $20, but I had known her for over a year.

If a girl walks out on your date because you don't buy her everything she is a golddigger anyway and most likely would not have given it up for you regardless. Better to get rid of her before she spends all your cash.

Anyway, that list was obviously either written by a girl or a DJ who is trying to thin the competition a little.

 

[THE_ADDMAN]

1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at herr house...she runs around in their underwear just like we do.

All the more reason to show up at her house

4. Never miss an opportunity to tell her she's beautiful.



6. If she slaps you hard, you deserved it.

See #16

10. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.

See #11.5

11.5 Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!

Feed the Whales! :crazy:

12. Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship.

aww how precious... and what do we get in return??

14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to beat the **** out of him.

not just be a lap dog, but a GUARD DOG too

15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.

what if they're both my girlfriend?

16. Never, EVER slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.

see #6. thats ok, I deserve it. cuz I'm a dumb male. riiiiight?

17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.

I care whether I enjoy it or not


20. Don't be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like ****, so be understanding.

Thats what she has friends for. I'll call her next week


23. Don't stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.

I could probably have some fun with this one

24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.

of course. and I expect it to be reciprocated


28. Don't give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. Jewelry is always nice.

As previously said: nice jewelry is expensive. buy cheap jewelry and ur screwed

29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.

Probably the best point on here

30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.

Until they cheat on you with a guy they just met

THE END

 

[Teflon_Mcgee]

I was going to post a new thread about that stupid chain letter.

I particularly like the "do you really need all your money? Pay all the time!"

Whatever, I am hardly successful with women, but I have learned one thing the hard way. That is DO NOT spend money on them. Every girl that I have ever spent money on has walked all over me. I won't do it anymore. Of the two girls that I have been with, one of them I have never spent a cent on and the other I bought her a bday present once, like $20, but I had known her for over a year.

If a girl walks out on your date because you don't buy her everything she is a golddigger anyway and most likely would not have given it up for you regardless. Better to get rid of her before she spends all your cash.

Anyway, that list was obviously either written by a girl or a DJ who is trying to thin the competition a little.

I think that can be modded to never spend money on a chick you aren't
a.) Fvcking
b.) does not have an emotional attachement to you (you, however, do not need one.)

I learned the same lesson as you back in my AFC days. I noticed a pattern after a few women. Then I went to the polar opposite and would avoid spending money on them at all cost. But I truly do enjoy treating my women good as long as they don't mistake my kindess for weakness.

 

[Warboss Alex]

The Alex view: (I've been in a successful relationship with my missus for years)

someone sent this to me on MySpace lol:



This was written by a guy who has years of experience. Believe you me, most of them are true about girls....

1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at herr house...she runs around in their underwear just like we do.

I KNOW. YOU SHOULD SEE THE ASS ON MY MISSUS. I ACTUALLY INSIST SHE WALKS AROUND IN HER UNDERWEAR.. SHE DOESN'T MIND AS LONG AS I DO TOO!

2. DON'T CHEAT ON HER. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, she WILL find out and you will be mud.

TOTALLY AGREE, CHEATERS ARE SCUM. IT MAY SEEM 'COOL' BUT IT'S REALLY REALLY NOT.

3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat.

AT MY SIZE I'VE NOTHING TO FEAR.. HOWEVER IF YOU'RE A JERK TO HER THEN THEY HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO HATE YOU AND KICK YOUR ASS. I WOULD TOO.

4. Never miss an opportunity to tell her she's beautiful.

AGREED. IF YOU DON'T THINK SHE'S BEAUTIFUL WHY ARE YOU WITH HER? SPEAKING YOUR MIND IS GOOD. HINT: TELLING HER SHE'S BEAUTIFUL IN FRONT OF HER FRIENDS/FAMILY SCORES POINTS!

5. Don't refuse to kiss her in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's just because they're jealous.

PDA IS PARAMOUNT. WHY SHOULD YOU REFUSE ANYWAY?

6. If she slaps you hard, you deserved it.

THIS IS PROBABLY TRUE. AND IF YOU SPANK -HER- HARD, ALL THE BETTER.

7. Don't be afraid to touch her if you want to. If she's going out with you in the first place, it's because she likes being in your arms.

EXACTLY! COULDN'T AGREE MORE.

8. If you don't sleep with her, DON'T tell your friends that you did.

NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS, AGREED.

8.5 If you DO sleep with her, DON'T tell your friends that you did.

AS ABOVE

9. You can be dirty minded in private, really...most of them are not offended by it...

IF SHE'S WITH YOU, SHE -WANTS- YOU TO BE DIRTY WITH HER.. TREAT HER AS A LADY IN PUBLIC AND AS A SLUT IN PRIVATE.

10. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.

TOO RIGHT. MY BABY AND I OFTEN HAVE EATING CONTESTS. AND SHE'S LESS THAN HALF MY SIZE AT 120.. AND SHE -STAYS- THAT SIZE, DAMN HER.

11. Most of them don't mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a *****..

GOING HALVES IS FINE, ALTHOUGH TREATING HER SOMETIMES IS GOOD TOO

11.5 Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!

AS ABOVE.. I SPARE NO EXPENSE IF I'M GOING TO TREAT HER OR BUY HER A GIFT. IT WILL BE APPRECIATED

12. Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship.

SHE HAD ALL THOSE FROM ME EVEN BEFORE WE MOVED IN TOGETHER, LOL. ONLY IT WAS SEVERAL STUFFED ANIMALS, SEVERAL OF MY SHIRTS (WHICH SHE STILL SLEEPS IN) AND -LOTS- OF JEWELRY.

13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.

DO YOU -NEED- TO BE TOLD THIS?

14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to beat the **** out of him.

I HAVE DONE. MANY TIMES.

15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.

-ALWAYS- HAVE YOUR GIRLFRIEND AS CLOSE AS CAN BE.

16. Never, EVER slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.

WE WRESTLE A LOT. SHE ACTUALLY WINS SOMETIMES, BECAUSE I'M A WUSSBABY *****. BUT NEVER HURT HER.

17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.

AGREED. WE WATCH CHICK FLICKS A LOT.

18. You're dead meat if you can't get along with their pets, parents, and best friends. Be prince charming to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.

AGAIN AGREED. I WAS MORE WORRIED ABOUT IMPRESSING HER PARENTS THAN HER. LOL. WE BOTH LOVE ANIMALS SO NO PROBLEM THERE. I COULD CARE LESS ABOUT HER FRIENDS ALTHOUGH I'M ALWAYS NICE TO THEM.

19. Don't flirt with their moms...that's just freaky.

NO IT BLOODY WELL ISN'T. I DO IT ALL THE TIME.

20. Don't be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like ****, so be understanding.

AGREE AGAIN.

21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.

SHE ACTUALLY DOESN'T LIKE THE WAY -I- DRIVE.. LOL

22. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend.

WHY WOULDN'T YOU?

23. Don't stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.

EXACTLY!

24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.

AGREED.

25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle.

NOT NECESSARILY. BUT AGAIN, DON'T HURT HER.

26. Memorize their god damn birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.

.. IF YOU FORGET HER BIRTHDAY, WHAT DO YOU ACTUALLY REMEMBER!?

27. Don't marinade the cologne, but smell good.

VERY UNDERESTIMATED. WE LIKE OUR GIRLFRIEND TO SMELL PRETTY, THEY WANT US TO AS WELL! FIND OUT WHAT SHE LIKES AND WEAR IT.

28. Don't give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. Jewelry is always nice.

SHE ALWAYS GOT JEWELRY FROM ME.. AND A STACK OF OTHER STUFF WHICH WASN'T TRADITIONAL BIRTHDAY/CHRISTMAS FARE BUT VERY 'USSY' IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. MEANINGFUL GIFTS MEAN MORE THAN ANY AMOUNT OF MONEY SPENT.

29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.

WHY SHOULD YOU BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WHEN YOU THINK IT WON'T LAST? GET OUT QUICK IF THAT'S THE CASE.

30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.

AGREED. DO NOT ABUSE THEIR FAITH IN YOU.. IT'S THE WORST THING IN THE WORLD. DO NOT TAKE IT FOR GRANTED EITHER.

(If you have read this and you are a girl, then some of these things are actually really true...am I right?! And if you read this and you are a guy, then these are like the mother ****in best tips you could ever get!)

You now have 2 options...
1) Repost this bulletin and you will have good luck in all your relationships.
2) Ignore this, and you will have bad luck in all your relationships...now you wouldn't want that, would you?

*cue 'AFC! BURN THEM! BLASPHEMY' from the DJ-bible-bashers.. and cue wise nods of agreement from people who've actually been in a successful relationship before.*